Pennames
by Bittersweetbloodbaby
Summary: Jess and Rory are 25 years old, living on opposite ends of the country, and both happen to have books on the bestseller list. Jess never came back East after leaving for California, until now. Epilogue up: Mr. and Mrs. Mariano
1. Pilot

**Pennames**

Rory/Jess fanfic

By: BullenRose / BitterSweetBloodBaby

Summary: Jess and Rory are 25 years old, living on opposite ends of the country, and both happen to have books on the bestseller list. Jess never came back East after leaving for California, until now.

Chapter One – Pilot (you tell me if you want more)

It's funny how you prepare yourself, mentally and physically, for something that changes in the blink of an eye. You spend most of your childhood picturing the perfect member of society you want to be, and the path that is most likely to get you there. For Rory Gilmore, that path had always taken her through Boston for a few years, and then overseas. She was going to go to Harvard, and become an overseas correspondent. But then the letter from Yale came, and she chose the security of being close to home over the sprawling campus that was Harvard. Not that Yale wasn't sprawling. In fact, it was just as good of a school as Harvard, with the added benefits of being close to home.

During the summer after her sophomore year, she got an internship with Channel One news. She'd get to spend two months in Indonesia, covering terrorist preventions. The opportunity of a lifetime? Oh yes. Except, when Rory got to Jakarta, she didn't want to write about things on a large scale. She didn't want to cover only government precautions, and leave the citizen's plot alone. And she didn't want to sit back and observe. So she did her own research whenever she had a chance. She talked to any English-speaking locals she could find. She wrote constantly in the plain composition book she'd brought from the States. And when she set foot back on American soil, and jumped into her mother's awaiting arms, she had four words to express how happy she was: "I'm writing a book!"

Majors were changed, classes were adjusted, and Rory finished her novel before finishing her junior year. It wasn't an instant hit, Archipelago Of Life, not by a long shot. All it basically did was score Rory a publishing deal and give her and her mother a chance to mull over long lists of could-be pennames.

"Agatha Christie!"

"Taken."

"Alice Sebold!"

"Also taken."

"How about you be a guy? F. Scott Fitzgerald!"

"Are you trying to annoy me, or is there a part of your brain that actually believes you're helping?"

"I'm just trying…OH, how about Rory Gilmore?"

"Mom! I wrote a book! Okay, so it's my first book and it won't end up on Oprah's book club anytime soon, but this is the most important thing I've ever done, and you are not assisting."

"Hey, sorry, just me being me. And your book will SO end up on Oprah's book club if I have to cross out The Bell Jar myself!"

"And write my book in it's stead?"

"That was the plan, yes."

"Mom, you fell asleep trying to read my book."

"It was late!"

"You couldn't pronounce the title!"

"I didn't graduate high school for a reason, babe"

"How about an Anna? I look like an Anna, don't I?"

"Yuck"

"You're no help"

"Well what do you expect from a woman who names her daughter after herself just to avoid going through all this?"

"Lorelai."

"Oh…"

"What the- LOR!" The elder Gilmore's love interest, Luke Danes, had just walked over to their table to take their order, and found the two looking at a baby-name book.

"What do you think of Arnold, Luke?"

"What the hell is going on here?"

"Oh, calm down Sparky. We're picking a penname for Rory," she announced with glee.

"Oh. Well, in that case, go with something simple. That way it'll be easier to remember. Maybe a variation of your own name. Leigh, maybe. I dunno, you two get back to that. Coffee?"

"Yes please!" Luke nodded and shuffled off, heart still painfully thumping at the sight of Lorelai leafing through the book. Meanwhile, the Gilmores looked at each other.

"He's so smart!"

"Well, he IS dating me."

"Of course! Leigh! Why didn't we think of it? It's brilliant!"

"Because...we were naming my and Luke's baby?"

"I need a last name! Think of one quick before the Muse runs away again!"

"We have a Muse?"

"Yes, and she's about to leave because she's scared of you. Think!"

"Gilmore!" Rory looked at her mother for a long second, before downing almost half the cup of fragrant coffee Luke handed her. It wasn't until she was in bed that night that the other half of her name came to her, because it was technically her other half. Leigh Hayden.

It took two more failed books before Rory struck gold. She stayed with the international fiction theme, writing about the dying rooms in China and infamous Swiss boarding schools. But after living with a tribe of Amazon-dwellers for a few weeks and taking notes on everything, her first note-worthy book came into being. Oprah approved, critically acclaimed, and audience adored, Rory became the star of Star's Hollow, where she still lived with her mother and wrote day after day.

She had a lot of friends in and around Star's Hollow, but hadn't had many boyfriends. Actually, since Jess, she hadn't been in a relationship. Try as she might to get over him, every time she opened her heart to a guy, she discovered the wound to her heart was still very present. So she didn't let anyone in. It was better that way.

Lying across the country, in the hot Californian sun, Jess Mariano formed the words to his next sentence in his head. Something about her eyes…that would conclude the paragraph. God, those beautiful blue eyes…

"I swear, if you get any tanner, you'll smell like that soup Lily made…remember the tomato? She burned it. How could anyone burn soup? Well, it's not like it's in the damn genes or anything, but even I can do Campbells."

Jess, also known to many as J. M. Danes, lifted his head off the sand and looked at his step-mother. Sasha was carrying a laundry basket full of his bed sheets, and frowning at him again.

"Jesus Jess, there's sand in the sheets! You can love the beach ON the beach, but tell it to stay outside!" He shrugged, and settled back into his hammock with his laptop.

"Would it kill you to brush yourself off before coming in the house?"

"My house."

"Someday, you're going to get over small-town girl, meet some hot young thing, take her home, and-Oh, wait, what's this? Jess has a sandy bed. Girls don't want sandy beds, Jess!" She drew out the word sandy both times, making it seem like she meant 'smelly' or 'filthy'.

"I like it, okay?"

"True. God knows it'll be the day when you'll get over your princess." Jess rolled his eyes and returned to his work. He had a few books on the circuit already, and they weren't selling too badly. Actually, his structured American literature was selling like hot-cakes. From the plight of a young working mother to the life of a border-hopper, he just pulled these ideas out of his ass and ran with them. Made some decent money. It's how he could afford the cute little beach house near his Dad's.

Dad. There's a word that was never really in his vocabulary. But after coming to stay for a month, and falling for the sea and surf the same way Jimmy had, he fell in with the family. Jimmy, Sasha, and Lilly, Jess's 16-year-old step sister. Lily's father had gone through a mid-life crisis a few months back, and tried to get custody of his daughter, so Jess had quietly stepped in to fund the court events. He did it just to be nice, and because he never really cared for extravagance, he was happy with his beach house and Chevy, but Sasha insisted on playing housekeeper in return. And she always scolded him about the sand.

In truth, he didn't mind having family obligations. It was nice to have someone who'd always watch your back, and they grew on you. Out East, he had Luke. He hadn't talked to Luke since he moved, hadn't talked to anyone there. But Luke had been there for him

during some tough times. He'd taken Danes as his penname more for Luke than his flaky mom. Liz would call about once a month, talk about how the fair was going, ask him how life was. She didn't know he wrote, and it was probably best that she couldn't tempt herself with Jess's money. But she was doing better. Maybe someday, they'd talk face-to-face again.

Jess returned to his book. This one was going to be titled, if nothing more clever came to him, City Boys and Small Town Girls. His editor had liked the name, even though it was supposed to be more of an autobiography than a love story. But his life before Star's Hollow didn't matter much. It was just filler for the first few chapters, and his life in California was the last few.

The rest of the book could have been called "Rory" simply, though Jess had changed their names for personal reasons. He stayed Jess, and she was Lauren. Everyone in town had names – Luke was Robert, Taylor was Patrick, Kirk was Rudolf (Lily's idea; Jess had been drunk and babysitting at the time he wrote it. Jess often wrote best drunk, and Lily often ended up stuck with him for the weekend so Jimmy and Sasha could do whatever Jimmy and Sasha did alone), and Lorelai was Lana. Not the most creative bunch of characters, but he couldn't think of anything else to call them without revealing their identities.

He smiled as he continued writing about Rory aka Lauren, letting the floodgate on his emotions open and spill out his guts onto the screen. It felt good to let them out. He hadn't really talked about Rory much. It took six years of prying for Sasha to learn there was a girl. He wondered what she was up to now, wondered what she'd say if she could see him here, happy. He hadn't cleaned up his act, but his attitude had changed. And in some people, that made all the difference.

They'd each read something by the other, although they didn't know it. Each had distinctly heard the echoes of the other in the passages, but never thought of putting two and two together. In the black and white of Rory's book-jacket photo, her eyes didn't shine enough to let on that she was the small town girl. And Jess's ungelled hair and tanner skin lead to a sad smile, and a thought 'that looks so much like him'. But he was almost smiling in the picture, so it couldn't be him.

Let me know if you want more!


	2. But it was

Oh my poor little heart...when I checked my reviews today and found 17 lovely little surprises waiting for me...I died and went to happy heaven. But I'm back now, as people seem to prefer me being alive and well so I can write for them. I'm so thrilled that so many people reviewed, I can't tell you how happy it makes me after coming from a smaller, less review-friendly site like I wasa little confused by some people telling me my idea was original, and others telling me it had been done before, but at least I didn't get any hate mail.

Wild Orphan: Thanks for telling me about the review thing!

JediPirateElfyDude: Thanks for your review of course...but I mainly wanted to tell you I loved your name!

Sony31: Yours was my favorite review. Thank you for loving!

Everyone else:YOU GUYS ROCK!

Chapter Two

"Now you stay right next to me the entire time. If I turn around and I don't see you on my elbow, I will hunt you down and stick your ass on a plane back to California. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, big brother." Lily answered Jess, rolling her eyes.

"I'm serious Lily. New York is a mean place. I don't want to scare you by telling you about all the things that could happen to a 16-year-old girl like yourself-"

"I've read your books, Jess. Would you take a chill-pill? God…" J. M. Danes was setting off on a book-tour, and getting ready to board the plane back to the Big Apple. He'd laughed when Rory had called it that. But he didn't mind referring to it as that many years later.

Sasha and Jimmy had finally saved up enough to indulge in a semi-luxurious honeymoon… about time, as they'd been married three years. But Jess had offered to take Lily while they were in Mexico, so she was traipsing around the country with him. Lily was looking forward to the trip, but Jess was a little nervous about having his younger step-sister with him. Lily was the same book-loving, glasses-wearing, uncoordinated nerd she'd been when he met her, but time had been good to her, and she was blossoming into a lovely lady like her mother. And the boys were noticing.

"Do you have your pepper spray?"

"Yes, MOM."

"I'm just asking…there are some pervy people in New York"

"I'm going to sleep on the plane so I don't have to listen to you list everything that could possibly happen to me on this trip. I'll be with you the whole friggin' time, so no one can kidnap me, rape me, kill me, drug me, hurt me, or grab me."

"And if you decide to 'go out' with anyone, I meet them first."

"I think you need to sleep on the plane too."

In Connecticut, also heading off to New York, Leigh Hayden yelled upstairs to her mother as she mentally ticked items off her packing list.

"Mom! Did Sookie say whether or not she could get another sitter for the boys this week?"

"Michel volunteered."

"What?"

"After being threatened with the prospect of suddenly finding himself jobless."

"I hate to leave them with him…he has no idea how to take care of children!"

"Sweets, you're looking forward to this author-convention-thingy. Star's Hollow can make it without you for a few days."

"Oh my God, I forgot underwear!"

"Where did you forget your underwear?"

"I forgot it all together!"

"Please explain to mommy why you don't have underwear."

"I didn't pack it, meaning it's still in my drawer."

"So you just woke up this morning and thought 'Huh, I think I'll give my mother a heart attack today'? Is that it?"

"I hear the car out front, gotta dash!"

"Wait for me, kisses for me!" After saying goodbye to Lorelai, Rory settled back into the plush backseat of the publishing company's car, and took out one of her all-time favorite books. The miles passed as Oliver Twist came alive to her once again.

She reached her hotel and thanked the driver as he helped pass her bags on to the bellhop. As soon as she was alone in her soft-blue room, she flopped down on the bed and kicked her heels off. Pulling Oliver Twist out again, and turned MTV on in the background and continued reading. She didn't have anywhere to be until tomorrow, and she didn't feel like wandering.

Somehow the last time she'd been here and innocently wandered around, she'd come across the record store Jess had taken her to the day of her mother's graduation. How she could manage to find that exact store in the huge city, where there were millions of other places she could have wound up, she didn't know. But she was not eager to repeat the depressing experience.

Jess angrily dialed his publisher's phone number as Lily watched in amusement.

"Carl? What's this fax I just got mentioning something about an author's convention?"

"Ah, Jess. I was wondering when the furious phone call would come."

"Talk."

"Well, you're in town for a few days doing some signings and a few radio shows, and we just thought this would be another fun activity to add to the agenda."

"I told you what I'd do. I did not say I'd do this. I will not do this."

"Such negativity."

"I'm serious, what made you think I'd go to some ritzy party in the first place?"

"Well, you've got that ritzy-party-vibe going, and it'll be good promotion."

"You know that commercial with David Spade where he says 'No' in very many different languages? I'm taking a leaf out of his book."

"Jess, it's publicity. You meet some authors, they read your book, next time they're being asked what's on their personal reading list they throw your name out there…it couldn't be more fun."

"Oh, I could think of some ways."

"You don't want to do TV? Fine. But you can at least run a comb through your hair and show up tomorrow night. Do it for the damn book, Jess."

"I can't. I…I've got my sister here with me! I'm not leaving her alone on the dangerous streets of New York."

"Wonderful, bring her along! We'll hear all about it the next day. Mind your manners while you're there, Jess." Jess blinked at the phone as he heard the dial tone. How the hell had that happened? Meanwhile, Lily was sitting on her bed laughing at him.

"You lost to a corporate executive!"

"Shut up brat, you got roped into coming along."

"What? How? Why?"

"The same ways and reasons which I have to thank for this."

"I have nothing to wear." Jess sighed and took out his wallet.

"C'mon…neither do I."

The next night, Jess fiddled with his new tie as he concentrated on the new book he was reading, Russia Tells No Lies, by some chick named Leigh Hayden. He'd read some of her other works, and she wasn't bad. She was a talented writer who managed to slip some of her own humor into books on the most serious subjects.

"Lily, we're going to be noticeably late."

"I thought you didn't want to even show."

"The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave. I promised Carl an hour and a half."

"Ninety minutes is ninety minutes, Jess."

"Stop your primping and get out here." Lily stepped out of the bathroom and shyly twirled for Jess. His mouth fell open.

"You are not wearing that in public!"

"Why not?"

"Because men are going to mistake you for a hooker, that's why!"

"I do not look like a hooker! The skirt comes to my knees!"

"Yea, so does the top."

"You can barely see anything! Just my arms, back, and neck!"

"No."

"Since when are you so concerned about what I wear?"

"Since you decided that clothes were so last-season."

"I'll put a coat on, okay? You know, you're going to give yourself a heart attack at 25."

They walked down to the hotel ballroom, where the convention was conveniently being held. If he had been paying more attention, he would have noticed that when the publishing company made his reservations. Lily stopped him to fix his tie, took a deep breath, and pushed him into the room.

It wasn't that bad, Rory thought. When she'd seen the room at first, she'd thought this was going to be a Richard-and-Emily worthy event. But the tables were small and people looked friendly. She had a feeling tonight was going to be fun after all, despite the fact that she was dateless. Again. None of her usual platonic male escorts had been interested in coming tonight.

"Miss Hayden, so nice of you to join us." The voice belonged to an older friend of Rory's, the son of one of her Yale professors.

"Leonard Flemming, what are you doing here?" she asked, shaking his hand affectionately.

"Oh, nothing much, just checking out the fresh meat," he stated, glancing around in a bemused manner.

"What do you mean by that pointed comment?" Rory asked teasingly, sitting down next to her friend.

"Just that there's a lot of young talent in this room…writers who have made the bestsellers list before they're thirty."

"Moi would be one of them, Leonard."

"Well, congratulations. You deserve to be included on that list. I'm just afraid that some of these hotshots don't."

"Anyone in particular?"

"Now you know I don't gossip, but something tells me that blonde over there deals with more of the Princess Diaries crowd. Profitable, but it steals the essence."

"She could be here as someone's date. Did that ever occur to you? Thank you," she directed first at Flemming and then at a server who had brought her a glass of water.

"I suppose. Oh, there's somebody I've been wanting you to meet. Talented young gun, an Apple-Pie writer from California. I believe I heard that J. M. Danes was going to be attending this shenanigan, and against his will at that. Have you heard of him?"

"I've read Macy's Journal and Bus Fare. Both incredible stories. I'd love to meet him."

"Well, here's your chance. The man of the hour, J. M. Danes!" Both writers at the table turned towards a dark figure sulking by the bar. The blonde girl Flemming had pointed out earlier was arguing with him, her hands on her hips and her glasses slipping to the bridge of her nose. Rory had wanted glasses when she was a kid- she believed they made you look smarter. She'd stolen Lorelai's glasses many times, giving herself a headache when she wore them. If there was one thing that Rory felt made other women stand out more than her, it was the glasses. Lane was so lucky.

But all thoughts, glasses or otherwise, disappeared from Rory's pretty little brown head when the man turned towards Flemming's raised voice. Her breath caught in her throat. It couldn't be. But it was.


	3. Small town virgin

Oh yea, I think I'm 'posed to say somewhere in my story that I don't own. I thought that was implied, but just in case, the goddess that is Amy Sherman-Palladino owns these fine characters. I own the plot and a pair of groovy red knee socks.

Never-Rebel: Excellent idea about the books…I'll try and incorporate it soon!

nmshni: I hope I didn't hurt Sasha when I hit her on the head…

Helle18: I'm so glad you didn't think that sentence was confusing…I wondered how it would look to me if I hadn't written it. Also, I'm glad you liked the reference; come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen the music store referenced before either. Shame, because that was a great scene.

Roganu-chan: It's okay, grammar Nazis are fun! I don't always use the best grammar though, I'm the worst double-checker on the planet. So sorry in advance if I slip up a tad bit.

Everyone Else: I'm so sorry about the cliffhanger, I didn't really realize I did it…When I was writing the chapter, it was getting a little long so I stopped at the most convenient POV switch, and just made everything after that the next chapter…I got a lot of angry people on that one, so I'll try not to do it again.

Jess raised his eyebrow at the young woman who had just fainted a few tables away. Several of the older authors around her jumped up and ran to fuss over her, so he took his drink and walked away from the commotion. Lily followed.

"Just one?"

"I'm not getting you alcohol, Lil. You're 16."

"And when you were 16…"

"I could drink the boys under the table. But I didn't turn out too well, did I?" Lily shrugged.

"Maybe you screwed up a little. But I think you turned out okay." Jess grinned and gave his sister a one-armed hug.

"Maybe a sip…just cause I love you."

Meanwhile, Rory had about ten authors around her body, flapping books and pamphlets in her direction.

"Are you alright, dear?" asked an elderly looking lady.

"I'm fine. I just…need to get a drink." Instantly, all of her new friends were helping her stand up and offering to get her a drink, or better yet, give her theirs. She thanked them sincerely and set off for the bar by herself. She didn't see him standing there anymore, so she channeled her mother for a few seconds and ordered a martini.

After consuming the alcohol, she felt a bit better, so she went off to see if she could find him. It could have been her mind playing tricks, was most likely her mind playing tricks. He wouldn't be here, especially not out of the blue like this.

Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted him. He was standing near a plant, trying to fade into the wallpaper. His suit looked new, and a little rumpled. His tie was loose and his hair lay on his head the same way Jess's had. Jess had normally spent a great deal of time fixing his hair so it looked like he had just woken up, but sometimes he just left it alone. The first time she'd really seen him like that was when he bought her basket in a silly town event, and they ended up spending the entire day together.

The girl with him noticed Rory's stare, and she pointed this out to the man who looked so much like Jess. He turned and glanced at her, an amused look in his eyes. She lowered her head, letting her hair fall in front of her eyes, and stood frozen to the spot. She could almost feel him coming closer and closer until he stood directly in front of her, having darted across the room the second she lowered her head in such a Rory-like gesture.

"Rory?"

"Jess?" For a minute, neither said anything, just stared at each other.

"J. M. Danes?" she asked, prodding a bit. He cracked a grin, still showing a little of his old Jess-smirk, and nodded.

"And you are?"

"Leigh Hayden." He blinked.

"Russia tells no lies."

"That's the one."

"I was reading it like twenty minutes ago."

"Oh. Did you like it?"

"Yea. Good book." Neither said anything after this polite small talk, but each was too caught up in their own thoughts to notice Lily approach the situation.

"Jess? You going freeze-man on this girl?" Rory lifted her eyes again and glared at the girl before she could stop herself. It had always been like this with Shane, even when she tried to avoid being jealous.

"Oh hey Lily. Do you need something?" The girl looked at Jess weirdly.

"What's with you?" She noticed Rory standing there, wishing the floor would swallow her into it's depths.

"Who's you friend, Jess?"

"Her? No one…just an old acquaintance." Rory looked at him sharply, and he stubbornly stood still and stared past her. Acquaintance? Rory was not sure what exactly he'd call her, but being referred to as an 'acquaintance" by the man who'd stolen her heart and taken it with him to California was beyond cruel.

"Right..." Lily rolled her eyes and stuck her hand out, pretending to be of equally good breeding as the girl in front of her.

"Lily Mackenzie," she stated as Rory snapped out of her angry trance and shook her hand.

"Uh, I'm Leigh. Or Rory. Kind of both." Lily nodded and stepped back, nudging Jess to make sure he was still alive.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, noticing Rory resume checking out all the exits, and her brother remain motionless.

"Uh, Lily, do you want this?" Her eyes lit up as Jess handed over his half-finished sidecar, and she accepted it without a word. He jerked his head towards the tables as he completed the transaction, and she caught on.

"I'll be getting hit on by older men, if you need me," she casually mentioned as she left the two. Jess didn't say anything. She sighed and walked away, wondering who the chick was.

"So, here alone?" Jess asked once she was gone. Rory nodded and felt embarrassed. In her mind, she'd always pictured what it would be like to see Jess again. In her fantasy, he always stood on the side of whatever event they were at, as she strolled by in the arms of another guy. His face would contort in jealousy, and he'd run up to her and say something blunt and completely Jess-like. She'd always turn him down and watch as his heart fell out of his body and cracked on the cement (they were always outside in these reveries), finally feeling something similar to what she'd felt when he packed and left town without telling her. She'd never imagined what would happen after the initial meeting. It seemed too dangerous to venture down the path of regret and possible repentance.

But here he was with this Lily character, and she was the one by herself. The Gods of irony and fate were apparently waging war on her tonight.

"Why are you here Jess?" she asked softly, after another silent minute had passed. He shrugged and glanced around.

"Publisher made me. Tried to get out of it, but next thing you know he's dragging Lily into it, and telling me to comb my hair…" Jess trailed off, seeing Rory's face. He still knew her well enough to crack a smile.

"My dad got remarried. Lily's my step-sister."

"Oh," Rory said, blushing as he smirked at her. Feeling somewhat emboldened by the fact that he too was flying solo, she lifted her martini to her lips and downed the rest of the glass.

"Wow…Rory Gilmore slamming down. Who ever thought I'd see the day?" Rory blushed yet again and set the glass on the tray of a passing waiter. She turned and began to walk back towards her seat, hoping Jess would follow. He did, she noted with an apprehensive sort of glee. She reached her table and sat down, tucking her hands underneath the skirt of her blue silk dress. She'd bought it with Lorelai on a recent shopping trip, specifically for this night.

He glanced at the place cards, and saw that he was not sitting next to Rory tonight. Holding up a finger in the universal signal for 'Just a second', he maneuvered around the table and quickly switched cards with the gentleman next to Rory. She smiled shyly at him, as he sat down. He ran his hands through his hair and sighed.

"What's it going to be then, eh?" he asked with a slightly rough fake accent.

"A Clockwork Orange," she said, remembering one of his old favorites. He nodded.

"What's it going to be then, eh?" he asked again, moving closer and dropping his voice a few volumes. She gulped and felt the need to consume more alcohol, although a voice in the back of her head told her that would most likely complicate the situation. She did NOT need to be drunk when seeing Jess for the first time in six years. So she simply shrugged.

"I guess…we eat?" she suggested, as a waiter brought menus to the both of them. He stared at her with his piercing brown eyes, cold and warm at the same time, before casually flipping his open. Lily and the other authors joined them, making no mention of the change in seating, and sat down for dinner.

"So then I says to him, 'Bobby, m'boy, you can't really expect people to pay good money for this horseshit!', and he looks me in the eye and says, 'Charlie, when people are paying damn clean cash to put it in their gardens, they'll pay to put it in their heads!'" Everyone laughed at the old man's joke, a little tipsy by this point. The open bar seemed to be calling to everyone in the room. Lily was by far the soberest at her table, and she sat there playing with her napkin as she watched Jess and the girl named either Rory or Leigh. Somehow, Jess had ended up sitting next to Rory/Leigh, and their chairs had been scooting closer to each other as the night wore on. If she had to guess, she'd say Jess was interested in this girl. But as Jess was a career-first kind of guy, she hadn't seen this reaction enough to recognize all the signs. She did know one thing though: 'acquaintance', her ass.

"Jess…what's this I hear about another smashing seller?" Jess grinned at the man who had asked the question and waved his hand through the air.

"Smashing indeed…God that last round was strong." Everyone howled with laughter and Lily rolled her eyes. Jess was having a lot of fun drinking with men twice and three times his age. And the way Rory/Leigh was fawning over him every time he spoke was almost sickening. He'd look at her out of the corner of his eye as he addressed the entire table, and Rory would stare back, a defiant smile on her face. Every time he made a joke she placed the back of her hand –Oh so ladylike- over her mouth as she giggled girlishly, and whenever he fully turned towards her she leaned in so he could say whatever he had to say in her ear. Then she did the hand-over-mouth giggling thing.

"Do tell us, Jess!" exclaimed the only other female author at the table. Jess held up his hands in an exaggerated shrug.

"City Boys and Small Town Girls. I go to small town, hook up with small town virgin, the rest is history." Everyone laughed and applauded, and turned towards a new speaker. Meanwhile, Rory/Leigh pulled Jess closer to her and the two began to have a hushed conversation.

"What?" she asked, having wigged out as soon as Jess said that. He shrugged again.

"Autobiography, sort of. I wrote it." She nodded, feeling very close to tears for some reason. 'small town virgin'? This was worse than 'acquaintance'. He instantly knew what was bugging her, and reached up to tuck some of the brown hair that brushed her cheek behind her ear.

"Hey. I'm drunk. It wasn't like that in the book. I didn't even use your name. I didn't exploit you." She nodded, the tears coming closer now.

"I have to use the ladies room," she stated, standing up slowly and then backing out of the room. She held his gaze painfully the entire time, before exiting the convention and running upstairs.

As soon as she reached her room she grabbed her cell phone off the dresser and pressed speed-dial.

"Gilmore residence" an unhappy voice stated.

"Luke? She's got you answering the phone?"

"Rory? Hey kid, what's up?"

"I need to talk to my mom."

"Hang on a second, she'll be out of the shower momentarily."

"No Luke, I NEED to talk to my mom! Now!" There was some mumbling on the other end, and Lorelai's voice answered a few seconds later.

"This had better be good, because if I get back and all the hot water is gone, daughter pays."

"Mom, I'm incredibly drunk."

"Didn't I send you off to an author's convention? Bunch of old guys gathering around a roaring fire to discuss literature?"

"Jess has a step-sister" she said, ignoring her mother's interruption. She was trying to get everything across, and short bullet points seemed to be a good way.

"Wait, what? Jess?"

"He's here. He's J. M. Danes. He wrote a book about me. But he didn't exploit me."

"Rory, deep breath. Okay, one for me too. Now what is going on? Where are you?"

"In my hotel room."

"And Jess is?"

"Not in my hotel room?"

"Okay. That's…very good. Where else is he?"

"Downstairs. He's at the convention. With Lily. Do you think glasses would make me look smarter?"

"Whoa, slow down Speedy. Jess crashed the convention?"

"His publisher made him comb his hair and come."

"Jess wrote a book?"

"Many books. Good books. I'll let you read one sometime."

"Lorelai, what's going on?"

"Jess wrote a book and is not in Rory's hotel room with Lily."

"What?"

"I don't know, I'm trying to figure it out too. Rory, any more clues as to what the hell you're talking about?"

"I miss him."

"Honey, I think you need to go to sleep now. It's getting late, and you can think about all this and tell me what exactly is going on tomorrow. When the bedroom stops spinning."

"Yea. No spinning. That's a good idea."

"Sleep tight, babe."

"Night mom."

The two Gilmores hung up. Rory kicked off her shoes and snuggled down into her bed as her mother suggested. Lorelai immediately went back to her shower, reached for the knob, and turned the water as cold as it would go.

"What are you doing now?"

"Clearing my head. Rory's riding the pink elephant with a bunch of old guys and Jess. My head thus needs clearing."

"Jess? Jess isn't back, is he?" Lorelai sighed and turned the freezing water off.

"I have no idea. She could be rambling. She WAS rambling. But it could have been all in her head."

"That's probably what it was. I mean, I haven't heard from him since he took off. He could be dead now for all we know." Lorelai nodded and began to comb through her cold, wet hair.

"Life would be so much easier if he was dead."

A/Ns- And no, Lorelai is not going to kill Jess. My sister asked me that after reading this, and I want to make it clear that she is simply expressing how much she loathes the little bastard. Whoa, got carried away there. I love Jess! I swear I do!

Somthing I've noticed on this site is that a lot of the Gilmore Girls writers are Dresden Dolls fans. I'm sorry, but I had to take a short little sentence to gush: I got to see them Friday night! They kick ass live, and afterwords me and my friend got their autographs, and our pictures taken with them. It was sooooooooooo amazing! Okay, gushing done.


	4. Who was the girl?

Helle 18: I didn't think Jess was being that mean, he was just being…Jess. A little on the cold side because he didn't know how Rory was going to receive him. And that whole he walked out on her thing, because Jess doesn't really like apologies so instead he acts like he didn't do anything wrong.

daphne-peneia: Your review was so sweet! I'm so glad you liked my story! teary eyes

Everyone: In this chapter I included an excerpt from Rory's book. I made up the title thinking it sounded good, but never actually thought about going into depth. I did some research on Russia and basically wrote a few short little blurbs for the story, and I picked the most believable-sounding one. Hopefully you don't think it sounds too horrible; I was going for a smart and worldly kind of feel, and I hope I didn't overdo it and make it sound really weird. Feedback on the blurb will be appreciated.

Also, I changed the chapter titles so now, except for the first one, they all feature an almost-randomly chosen line from the chapter. Some of the lines have everything to do with the chapter. Some of them just amused me.

And to everyone who's in love with Lily, she'll stick around a bit. So glad you like my interpretation of her character!

Jess sighed as he tried to undo his tie with impaired fingers. Lily stood in front of him with her hands on her hips, waiting for him to ask for her help. Instead he ignored her, and concentrated. Loosen…unknot…yank.

"Lily, get this thing off me." She smirked as she finished his task easily.

"You're so fucking drunk. I can't believe it; you wanted to eat and run, but you made me sit there for hours while you talked to the old men!" Jess rolled his eyes and walked away, unbuttoning his shirt. He walked into the corner of his bed, almost tripped, and sat down heavily.

"Don't tell me you need help with that too."

"Oh look, it's Lily's bedtime."

"I can't, Mom and Dad told me to call them tonight."

"It's two in the morning, call them when they're awake."

"Jess, just take your pants off and go to sleep." He complied, not having the energy to fight her, and she picked up the phone between their beds.

"Hey Dad, it's me. Did I wake you up?"

"Nope. Just sitting out, enjoying the stars. Your mom's asleep though," Jimmy said. Jess faintly overheard their conversation; the voices were keeping him awake.

"How're you two?"

"I'm good. Jess is drunk off his ass."

"Tattletale," Jess muttered as he shoved his pillow over his head, trying to block out the murmuring.

"Do they allow that on book tours?"

"We had to go to this party tonight, and Jess at first didn't want to go. But he got into this huge debate with a man who had an English accent over Hemingway. And it was open bar."

"Well, be a good sister and get him some Asprin tomorrow. You had better not be drunk, young lady."

"Please, Jess is going psycho control-freak on my ass. He won't let me leave the hotel room without him, much less get wasted."

"Good for him. I'll talk to you later, Lilylou?"

"Sure. Have fun with mom, but not too much fun. One brother is about all I can take."

"Ha ha. Goodnight, kiddo." Lily returned his goodbye and hung up, then turned to Jess's motionless form.

"Are you still conscious?"

"Shut up."

"Who was the girl?"

"Jess is sleeping"

"Looked to me like you knew her"

"What part of sleeping do you not understand?

"She was pretty. And, don't look now, but I think she has a thing for you." Jess sat up so fast the pillow he had been pressing over his ears went flying.

"Shut up you stupid bitch, you have no idea what the hell you're talking about!" Jess yelled at her suddenly, startling them both.

"What's your problem?" she asked with concern in her voice, but Jess stood up and grabbed the book from his bedside table. He stalked into the small bathroom and shut the door, completely bewildering Lily.

As soon as he got in the bathroom, he locked the door and turned around. Feeling thoroughly exhausted, he slid down the length of the door until he was huddled on the floor. Looking at the book on his hand, he groaned. His first impulse when Lily started prying had been to grab something to read and get out of there. He'd been too smashed to actually get up and go, but when she naively suggested that Rory might 'have a thing' for him, he'd fled from a mixture of emotions. Anger, anxiety, and fear.

He'd been angry, first of all, because she had no idea what had gone on between them. Sasha had deduced that Jess was 'Stuck on some chick', but he'd never officially said she was right. So Lily wouldn't know that Rory was THE girl. And she just started making assumptions based on nothing. It made his blood boil just thinking about what Lily didn't know, but thought she had every right to talk about.

He was anxious because there was a small part of him that hoped she was right. He'd first figured out Rory 'had a thing for him' when Luke had forced him to attend some crazy Bracebridge event at Lorelai's Inn. He'd been bored out of his mind, so he'd decided to wander around and check out the art on the Inn walls. In New York as a child, his mother had taken him to a different art museum each month if he was good. To Liz that meant cooking (soup and Ramen on their budget) for the two of them and keeping the apartment they were living in semi-clean. It was unreasonable to expect that much from a seven-year-old, but most months Jess had taken care of them both, and gotten his reward. He liked to walk around and try to imagine what the artist had been thinking while he or she was painting.

So he drifted around the Inn, admiring for a bit. Rory had been standing in the lobby crossing off the names of the guests who had arrived. Just as he'd seen her out of the corner of his eye and looked her way, she turned around and saw him. Blushing, she faced forward again as quickly as she could, and her glance determinedly did not waver. At the time he'd thought it was because Dean had told her about the fight. But there was no reason for her to act embarrassed. So he had a hunch it was something else.

Dean left Rory by herself to take a sleigh ride with his bratty younger sister, and Rory had bundled up and headed out alone. Throwing caution to the wind, Jess had ran outside after her and jumped in her sleigh, trying to discern if his suspicions were correct. She'd gotten immensely flustered, and he knew. That's also about the time when he realized that he was interested in this shy, sweet, smart beautiful girl.

He was, above all, scared when he heard Lily say that. It was mainly what had prompted his flight from bed. Jess was the kind of person who didn't believe in regrets, but if there was ever a situation that he sometimes questioned how he'd affected it, it was leaving Star's Hollow without telling Rory. He'd give anything for a second chance, but didn't know if he deserved one. The fear that Rory would get hurt, no matter what did or didn't happen, scared him. And when she'd left to go to the 'Ladies Room', he knew she was hurt. He couldn't remember why, though. Possibly his mere presence in her life after six empty years.

He sighed loudly and looked at the book again. Why the hell not, it was better than Lily grilling him. He opened the novel, forcing himself not to focus on the author. He'd taken Rory's book with him. He had dropped his bookmark in his haste to the bathroom, so he opened it to the beginning. Holding it close to his face, he threw all of his concentration into the words.

"_It would seem to the casual observer that Russia cast its immense protective shadow over its allies. The sheer size of the empire as well as its many sources of vigor appeared to drape a loyal arm of defense over the shoulders of those with lesser power. The veneer was paper-thin to all those who'd personally dealt with this monster, and couldn't be more transparent to the dweller-ins of a particular Moscow vicinity called Odintsovo. _

_Terrorism, per say, did not run rampant in the streets. Fear of terrorism was very much present, but in the back of people's minds. Getting struck by lightning or hit by a zooming car also existed in the back of one's brain. But short of staying inside all day, there was nothing you could do other than the obvious and necessary. _

_Someone who regretted pushing these fears to the back of their mind sat, and would always sit, on the window seat of a pane on the first floor. The ground floor below hummed with the noises of life. Children scuttling and women scolding. Men growling and dogs howling. It was all the same, and it all faded together into a bulky blot on the music scale. These lively noises held nothing for our unnamed antagonist except a bitter aftertaste. As he'd smoked since his fourteenth birthday, this was nothing new. _

_The truth about Chechnya and the knowledge that his legs would never move on their own again mingled together in his head, until they hit an inaudible frequency and were replaced by a dull white noise that sounded much like a muffled animal. This animal never died, never slept, never ate, never sneezed, never nothing. He was there when our nameless friend woke, slept, ate, and sneezed. He would always be there. He would always be composed of sheer depression and dangerous truths. _

_These truths begged to be flipped over, and their underbellies exposed. Secrets are always brought to light, and you'd know this if you grew up in a small town. Odintsovo was not a small town, and hence its gossip chain was broken in places and rusted in others. The fact does not change that the reality would become obvious with time's passing. This mystery stranger would have nothing to do with the revealing though. He never moved from his prime spot by the window."_

Jess groaned and shut the book slowly. Small town. The book, Rory slipping through her glossed plot and referencing small town gossip, reminded him what he'd said before she'd run out. Liquor made him do stupid things, like call the girl whom he'd once loved a simple, generic term like 'small town virgin'. If he had actually meant that in his earlier stupor, it had been in a good way. The fact that she was completely untouched, even by Dean, had made him feel significant and protective. Knowing that he might be her first had blown his mind at the time. It never happened, somehow. Jess Mariano could have pretty much any girl he wanted, but when he'd actually stuck around long enough to have a relationship, and eventually fallen in love, Rory had left almost as pure as she'd come to him.

Rory lay in her bed, a few floors up. She'd slept fitfully and only woken when her mother cracked and called her back. Lorelai had tried to leave things alone and wait for Rory to call her, but by ten AM the next day, she was so jittery and concerned that she had to do something. So against Luke's wishes she called her daughter back.

"Ror? It's Mom. Did I wake you?"

"Kind of. It's okay, I was just getting ready to get up. Almost."

"So I know I might be overstepping those cute little dotted lines into your personal life, but I couldn't sleep last night not knowing why you were calling me wigging out and babbling about Jess." Jess. Last night came back to Rory.

"Oh no. Why did you have to remind me?"

"You forgot about Jess?"

"No, I thought it was another weird dream."

"Another?"

"It wasn't."

"Another?" The pitch of Lorelai's voice rose a few notches.

"God, what am I going to do?"

"You've been dreaming about Jess," Lorelai said, trying to be calm. At the diner, Luke sat down at the stool beside her and mouthed 'What?'

"Yea. Did I make an ass of myself last night, I can't remember."

"Well sweetheart, I wasn't there so I wouldn't know. So these dreams…dirty?"

"I remember flirting with him-damn it, I flirted with him- and then I left really suddenly." She remembered what he'd called her and got out of bed to find something for her headache.

"Dreams, Rory! Dreams!"

"What about them?"

"I can't figure out if you're avoiding the question, or exhibiting typical signs of a hangover." By now, the other diner patrons were eavesdropping openly. Miss Patty went as far as to sit on the other side of Lorelai and stare at her face. Luke tried to shoo her away, but Lorelai didn't notice any of it.

"I don't remember you asking a question, you just kind of made some general statements concerning dreams."

"Yes! Now we're getting somewhere. Now, talk to me. What's going on?"

"I have no idea. Are we talking about last night or my subconscious habits?"

"You can use words like 'subconscious' when you're hung-over? Boy, do I envy you."

"I need to go find a drugstore; they have no OTC medications in this room."

"Wait! Were the dreams dirty?" Rory pushed the 'End' button on her cell phone. After throwing a coat over the slept-in blue dress and going downstairs she began to analyze the conversation with her mother. She stopped thinking for a second to ask the concierge where the nearest drugstore was, and resumed as soon as her feet hit the busy New York pavement.

Lorelai was freaking out after she'd just mentioned Jess. Her mother had never approved of him or their relationship, but she'd never stood in their way. And Rory knew it had killed her to stand by like that when her gut was screaming at her 'Jess is trouble!' After all these years, Rory would have thought old feelings died hard, but at least they died. Apparently Lorelai was still terrified that Jess would hurt Rory just like Rory was terrified that she'd still find herself in love with him.

Not that being in love would be bad. Rory desperately wanted to feel like Jess had made her feel. After he left she craved it so much that she wrecked Dean's fresh marriage by trying to pull him back into her arms. After losing her virginity to him and being dumped, she'd been in a whirlwind of short relationships that tended to end as soon as she gave herself to the guy. It was with dry irony that she thought of the meaningless trysts she'd had, and yet never got there with Jess. He'd tried, one night at a party. And she'd refused for some childish reason. On top of everything else in his life, that didn't do anything to keep him around Star's Hollow.

Yes, sweet little Rory Gilmore had had 'trysts'. She was still very much the same girl Jess had known her to be, but also very different. If Jess hadn't left, would she be so different? That was mainly what the dreams she'd mentioned to Lorelai about centered on. They'd started the night of the Bracebridge dinner, when she realized that she had feelings for him for the first time, and grown in intensity and frequency when they got together. She'd always assumed that after they broke up, the dreams would cease. When they didn't, she just decided to give it time. Well, it had been six years, and she was dangerously close to saying she was still in love. She wouldn't admit it though. Infatuated, yes. He wore his tan like he'd been born golden-skinned, and his brown eyes were as gorgeous as they had been back then.

Those brown eyes were lazily staring in the mirror that that exact moment. Slightly bloodshot, but other than that, normal. Jess leaned his head down so he could splash water on his face more easily, and then turned the faucet off. He had fallen asleep on the bathroom floor, and woken up when Lily started banging on the door.

"I'm OUT," he said annoyingly to the girl as she rudely brushed past him. She slammed the door behind her, and he winced. Headache…not good. He picked up the phone and called the front desk, asking where he could get some Asprin. Instead of being hospitable to him and offering to send some up, like he would have liked, they told him that they'd been sending seekers of headache medicine down the street to Kramer's Market. Sighing, he knocked on the bathroom door and told Lily where he was going. He grabbed a coat and headed for the stairs.


	5. The Prodigal Nephew

Okay, I know not much happens in this chapter, but I wanted to write about the craziness of Star's Hollow. I hope the dialogue between Luke, Taylor, and Kirk near the end isn't too complicated...short of making it script-like, I couldn't find a way to clear it up. So just read it, and make educated guesses as to who's saying what. This might prove to be more complicated than it sounds, because Kirk's kids have amusing names, but happy reading!

OnLoveInSadness: I'm glad you liked drunk Jess, lol. Some people didn't, and I felt kinda bad…but I guess I have to take the constructive criticism. So far, none from you though!

Helle18: Wellllll, I guess it wasn't really a 'walking-out'. I have a pet peeve about reusing the same adjectives over and over and a story, and I'd said left several times by then. He did walk out on her, but not in the traditional walking-out way. I was just referring to his leaving Star's Hollow and trying to sound different, but I'm sorry if you were confused!

Everyone: Responding to the feedback on the stupid bitch comment…I thought Jess would be mad and drunk and hurt, so I was just fishing for something he could fling at Lily to try and hurt her. Hope no one was truly offended, because we all love Lily!

And to all of the people who are expecting a confrontation soon, well, that's been a little overdone. And I don't think it's like Rory and Jess. So my plot will be a teensy bit different. Oh, there will be R/J interaction. Don't you worry your pretty little heads.

Rory stood in the drugstore, trying to decide which brand-name pills to buy. Asprin or Advil? Both were tried and true. She picked the latter and tried to navigate her way out of the confusing aisles. Just as she spotted the check-out counter, someone bumped into her, causing her to drop her precious pills.

"Nice. I love this city," she stated wryly as she bent to pick them up. Her attacker froze, and then turned around.

"Rory?"

"Jess?" She stayed in her position, craning her neck to look at him.

"Uh, are you going to get up?"

"Maybe."

"Because if you faint again, it'll be a shorter distance to the floor from there."

"That went into the thinking process."

"Glad to know you weighed your options." An awkward silence descended on them, so Jess cleared his throat.

"Might you know where they keep the Asprin in this place?"

"Yea, it's over there."

"Thanks." Rory waited until he turned the corner near the bread, and finally stood. Her heart pounding, she finished the trip to the cashier.

She hoped to get out of there as fast as she could, in effort to avoid another embarrassing confrontation. The clerk, however, did not speak very good English, and it took a few minutes for him to ring up her purchase. In Rory's opinion that wasn't good for business, but who was she to question Mr. Kramer?

As she left the store, she noticed Jess loitering by the cigarettes. He had his desired drugs in his hand, so he was keeping his distance in an effort to make her feel more comfortable. A wave of gratitude clenched her, and she smiled at him as he glanced up to see if she was done. Surprised at her warmth, he grinned back. She exited the store feeling sixteen again.

At that same moment, all of Star's Hollow buzzed excitedly about the latest news. Miss Patty had told everyone she came across on her walk from the diner to her dance studio that Jess was back, and Rory was having a meltdown in her hotel room. Patty flagged down a car as it drove past her, carrying Kirk, Lulu, and their sons Luke and Taylor inside. Kirk was determined to name his children after some of the important people in his life.

"Lulu, darling! Have you heard the latest gossip?"

"Gena Moesely and the mailman?"

"Oh dear, that was yesterday's news. Hold on a second, you never met Jess!"

"I remember Jess very well. The day that bully left Star's Hollow was the fourth best day of my life," Kirk interjected, shuddering.

"Someone bullied you, baby?" Lulu asked her husband.

"Well, he didn't know he was bullying me, but his mere presence was enough to make me want to scream like a little girl and hide under the diner table. That scowl he wore did nothing to improve his image, and the way he treated customers made me fear for my life every time I ate at Luke's."

"Jess is Luke's nephew," Patty began to Lulu, ignoring Kirk. Lulu put the car in brake in the middle of the street, and faced Patty excitedly. This promised to be a good story. "One day his mom got fed up with him, stuck his butt on a bus, and sent him here to let us deal with him. At the time, Rory and Dean were a couple. Cutest couple you've ever seen off-screen! And Jess just gets here, the ruffian decides he wants our Rory, and before you know it BOOM! Dean is on the rebound and getting married, and Jess is parading all over town with our girl on his arm, even after he crashed her car and got in a fight with Lorelai. No one thought it would last, but he stuck it out long enough to fail high school and get on a bus to find his estranged father in California- without telling Rory! He skipped town and didn't even tell his own girlfriend! Poor dear was heartbroken, but tried to hide it from all of us. She went off to Yale and he never came back." Patty finished her story and finally stopped to take a breath.

"Wow, I wish I'd come to Star's Hollow earlier!"

"Oh sweetie, don't worry. A little birdy tells me Jess might be back in the neighborhood pretty soon." Patty winked and walked off, lighting a cigarette.

"Kirk, Jess is coming back! This will be so much fun!" Lulu gushed. Kirk blanched as she finished the short drive to Luke's diner, and unloaded her family.

"Luke! I have to talk to you!" Kirk yelled as soon as he stepped inside. Luke looked up from the booth where his girlfriend was sitting, staring silently at her coffee.

"Just a minute Kirk. Lorelai, are you going to drink that?" She nodded, but did nothing. He sighed, and stood up to talk to Kirk.

"I hear you nephew is coming back to town. Is that true?"

"Where did you hear that, Kirk?"

"Because if he is, I'd like to know in advance. I don't want to accidentally run into him. You see, I have an irrational fear of Jess, and I'd prefer not to let my children see me running down the street screaming for my mother. I have a feeling that should they see me doing that, it will come back to haunt me when they're surly teenagers."

"Jess is not coming back, I haven't spoken to him since he took off." Lulu sat down next to Lorelai, trying to engage her in conversation.

"So is it true they're back together?"

"I am going to kill Patty."

"I never knew the kid, but I'm a huge fan of people-watching, and I've been noting the reactions people have when they hear the news. Some people get all starry-eyed because rekindling old romances is so incredibly poetic! However, the majority seems shocked and enraged. You know what, I probably shouldn't be telling you this right now." Lorelai gave Lulu a small smile.

"It might be best not to."

"Okay, Kirk. Your family can order now, or you can go somewhere less hostile for lunch."

"What, are you turning into that hoodlum? Are you going to stare me in the eyes without blinking until I become so entirely paranoid that I pass out on the diner floor? If that's the case, I will take my family and leave!"

"Come again soon. Hey, get out of there!" he yelled at the younger Luke as he lifted the glass dome off the doughnuts.

"We're going, Luke."

"Yes, please get Luke out of here!"

"You threw yourself out of your own diner, Luke."

"I did not, I threw your Luke out of my diner!"

"I was schizophrenic for a time myself. I can recommend you to an excellent therapist."

"Out before I lose my temper!"

"Come with us, Luke."

"Take Luke and Taylor, and don't bring them back here."

"Excuse me?" Taylor Doose had just walked in. Luke groaned, and Lorelai giggled for the first time all day.

"Taylor, take Lulu's hand."

"What? I will not do that, Kirk."

"Now Luke, hold Taylor's hand."

"WHAT?"

"Kirk, please get your offspring off me. I swear, some people should never have been allowed to mate."

"Luke, let go of Taylor. No, hold Taylor's hand, but please release your hold on Taylor's pant leg."

"Lorelai, these children have jam-hands!"

"Luke, please don't kick Luke!"

"Okay, Taylor and Luke are now leaving my diner."

"You cannot kick me out, Luke."

"You kicked yourself out again, Luke." Luke made a guttural noise somewhere between a scream and a growl, and stalked upstairs. Lorelai smiled as she took a sip of her coffee, cheered. Taylor Doose sat down across from her.

"So, the prodigal nephew returns?"

Rory took a long, cold shower before ordering food. She could have gone to one of the restaurants on the list she googled before coming here, but she felt like hanging with herself today. So she watched CNN while she waited for her room service, and then debated calling her mother again. Lorelai hated being out-of-the-loop for anything, and Rory knew she'd be freaking out wondering what the 'Jess-situation' was. She didn't know herself. She had no idea what she was going to do, but she couldn't just run in to him after all these years, and let him walk away again. She didn't know when he was leaving. She'd have to talk to him soon.

She dialed Lane and Dave's number when she finished eating. Dave was a keeper. He'd actually come back from California, for Lane. Lane was her best friend in the world, other than her mother. Rory and Lorelai were closer than close, and acted more like best friends and roommates than mother and daughter. That didn't mean that Lorelai was thrilled about Rory's encounter last night, though.

"Lane? It's your favorite Pulitzer princess," Rory quipped as Lane picked up.

"Rory? Thank God, I've been waiting for you to call me with details!"

"Uh, details of what?"

"You and Jess!"

"How do you know about Jess?"

"Patty."

"How would Patty know? I'm in New York!"

"She's Patty. Her sources reach far beyond Connecticut."

"They must,"

"So tell me!"

"There's nothing to tell! I just ran in to him last night, and we started talking and drinking and before you knew it, we were both smashed and hitting on each other and then he said something cruel and insensitive and I ran to my room, called my mom, and fell asleep."

"That's it? The town is talking like you're back with him, and we thought he was coming back to Star's Hollow!"

"That's it. Well, we ran into each other, literally, when we were buying painkillers this morning."

"And?"

"And...we kinda smiled at each other. I think things are going to be okay."

"Oh my God, smiling? You guys had a moment!"

"We did not have 'a moment'! It was just an unspoken agreement that nobody gets hurt."

"So what now?"

"I honestly have no idea. I mean, I can't find any logic that tells me to seek him out before he leaves, but I can't fathom the thought of actually seeing him for the first time since he left me, and not doing something."

"What's something?"

"Not a clue so far,"

"Oh my God, you're getting back together!"

"What? No, that's not what I meant!"

"Rory, go for it! You haven't been in a healthy relationship since Jess left, and maybe there's a reason for that."

"Maybe there is, maybe there isn't. So now that the whole town knows, how are people taking it?"

"Well, Kirk is still scared of Jess."

"Still?"

"I know, it's heartbreaking. Your mom is looking a little dazed, but that might be because she's confused. Everyone else is on their toes waiting for Patty to find out more."

"Lovely. I'll call Patty later and set her straight."

"Luke looks a little mad. Jess is a sore subject for him, so I don't think he's too fond of the latest gossip. Dean is...Dean. He still cares about you, Rory. I think he's mad."

"We're just friends now, Lane. When he and Lindsey decided not to go ahead with the divorce, we had to forget our feelings for each other, and we did. Lindsey trusts us now, and yes he still cares about me, but it's more of an older-brother thing."

"Still, he's Dean. Which means he hates Jess, and he doesn't want you to be with him. It's a guy thing, I don't understand exactly how it works. Dave tried to explain it to me once, but no good."

"Well, I doubt very much that Jess will come back to Star's Hollow, so we can avoid a repeat of their last encounter."

"I'll drink to that. Of course, I don't have anything to drink, but I'll pretend I do because that is a good idea, avoiding."

"I'm going to go call my mom and Miss Patty now. I'll talk to you later, Lane."

"Wait! One more question!"

"Shoot,"

"Do you want to get back together with Jess?" Rory was silent for a few moments.

"What I want and what I do are two entirely separate things," she said finally. It seemed the safest answer, especially because she wasn't sure she could answer the question yet.

"Live for yourself, Rory. No one's stopping you. Even Lorelai would want you to be with him if it makes you happy." Rory half-smiled, even though Lane couldn't see her, and hung up.

Reviews make my day, and they sometimes give me good ideas.


	6. Someone Very Special

**In this short (sort of) Author's note, I must comment on something that I foresee being a problem. And this is not a personal attack on anyone, just something that I feel is going to irk me and you in the coming chapters. This story is written several years from the current season of Girls, and already on the show Rory is changing. She's making some rasher decisions that she wouldn't have made in the first few seasons. I'm not trying to make the Rory in my story OOC; rather I'm trying to envision what she'll be like in the future. So, about the rash decisions, there will be some. And they will make perfect sense to Rory. And if they happened on the show, no one would question them. So don't yell at me 'Rory would never do that!', because she might. And, to restate myself, this isn't an angry thing. It's a public service announcement that I'm asking you to be open minded, and I will write some cool chapters to the best of my writing ability. Thank you for your cooperation! (sorry, just had to say it)**

Jess packed his new coat and tie into his black suitcase. He'd purchased them yesterday just for the convention, and guessed he'd better take them with him. Throwing them in the room's wastebasket was tempting, but it would make for less shopping if he ever went to one of these bashes again. He might have to – he'd had more fun than expected debating Hemingway with his newfound friends.

And of course, Rory had been there. She'd lit up the entire room; he had no idea how he'd entered and not immediately noticed her. When she first saw him, she FAINTED. Was that bad? He remembered feeling a little weak in the knees when he turned around and saw her shyly standing there in a clingy blue dress. But he hadn't passed out. Which brought him back to the original question- was that bad?

It would all depend on why exactly she felt the need to black out in his midst. Pure shock and surprise seemed most likely, but it could have been fear, anger, or anxiety. The same three reasons he'd run from Lily last night.

Or maybe she was just dehydrated. She'd downed almost an entire martini afterwards, so that could be it. Probably not, but it could be. It would probably help him to relax if he just pretended that was it.

This morning, in the drugstore, he'd bumped into her. Someone up there must be meddling, because his life had been awfully coincidental where she was concerned. He'd decided to skip school, sit in the park, and read on the very day she came to New York to see him. The day he'd left, her first class had been late and she'd talked to him on the bus. Now this convention thing, and running into her this morning. It seemed to him that supernatural forces were meddling in his life. He didn't know whether or not to offer a short prayer of thanks, or flip the sky off.

"Please tell me who she was!" Lily begged. She'd been a broken record all day. Jess sighed and glared at her stonily.

"Well if you're not going to tell me, I'll find out myself."

"Yea, sure you will. How are you planning on accomplishing that?"

"I'll figure out a way. I'm a persistent person."

"I know this."

"So are you going to tell me?"

"Of course not,"

"Bitch."

"Is your shit packed yet?" Lily stuck her tongue out and exited the room dramatically. Jess sighed and flopped down on his bed, reaching for the remote. He channel flipped, looking for something decent, while Lily made her way downstairs.

She reached the front desk, muttering under her breath what a prick her brother was, and gave the hotel employee standing there her best and brightest smile.

"Hi. I'm looking for someone I met at the author's convention last night. She told me to find her today so I could get my wrap back, but I forgot the number of her room, and I don't think she'll be wandering around today because she was pretty drunk last night." The man looked up, bored.

"I'm not authorized to give you that information." He went back to his computer, hunting and pecking while she stood there.

"Okay, I really need to know this, because I might miss her and the wrap belonged to my grandmother." She wasn't sure where she was getting this stuff. Maybe she had also inherited the story-spinning gene. The problem with her theory was that her and Jess weren't blood related, so he must just be rubbing off on her.

"Well that's just too bad, isn't it?"

"Excuse me, I'd be a smidge nicer if I were you. Not only is my brother one of your famous guests, but he doesn't it like when people are mean to me." That was true. Jess could kick this guy's ass.

"I'm sorry miss, but I cannot disclose that to you."

"Fine. I hated my grandmother anyway." She stormed away, not knowing what to do next. Something about Jess's behavior last night and today unnerved her a bit. It wasn't like him to act like that. So she was meddling, partly because she was curious, and partly because she wanted Jess to be happy. Last night when Rory/Leigh had sat next to him, giggling at his jokes and shooting him deep looks, he'd been happy. When Rory/Leigh had gotten up abruptly and left, he'd looked like she ripped his heart out and kicked it across the floor. There was so much more than met the eye, but the question was, what was it?

She sat in the lobby for about thirty minutes, trying to come up with a new strategy. When nothing came to her, she finally gave up and went back upstairs. Jess was dozing on his bed, C-SPAN on the TV, and all her things were piled next to her suitcase. She started folding and packing, disappointed that she couldn't come up with another way to find the girl. She really wanted to see that spark in Jess's eye again, if only for a few minutes.

Jess, what with his Rory-luck, almost expected to wake up and find that Lily had dragged her in. When that didn't happen and the two of them picked up their bags and headed for their cab downstairs, he half-anticipated running into her. But he didn't. He couldn't reach her here. If he wanted to reach her, he could always call Luke. It would be out-of-the-blue, but Luke would have the girls' number, that is if Rory still lived with Lorelai, and they lived in the old house. But regardless, he could get in touch with her if he really wanted. That was why he wanted to run into her again- so he could see her again without having to decide if he wanted to contact her.

They reached the ground level and stepped outside. Their driver loaded their bags as Lily told him where they were heading. Off to lunch with some reporter before getting on a plane and heading for Philadelphia. Lily slid into the cab with a flourish, and he paused for a second to look back at the hotel. Rory had been there. Rory. There. With him. It was almost too much to comprehend. He'd never planned on seeing her again; he thought it would be too hard for both of them. But then at the least likely moment, he'd turned around and there she was.

He was standing there, looking up at the building. Her heart pounding, she took in the scene: him, the busy street, the taxi. He was leaving. He could have called anytime; it was the same number as it had been when they were together. She was the one who didn't have the means to find him. Hesitating, she clutched her coffee tightly. Damn Lorelai, if she'd never gotten Rory hooked on coffee, this emergency coffee run wouldn't have been necessary. And then she wouldn't be standing her, almost in tears, terrified that she might lose her only chance but unable to move.

So she didn't think. She just dropped her coffee-something Gilmores don't do often- and ran.

Jess closed the door behind him, and the cabbie shifted gears. He began to cruise along the curb, looking for the perfect moment to dart into traffic. Something hit the window, and Jess snapped his head to the window. Someone was knocking on the glass. The cabbie swore in Spanish as Jess shouted at him to stop, and rolled down his window. It was an old-fashioned manual window, which meant that it took longer to find out who was knocking. Who he saw stunned him, and he heard Lily's sharp intake of breath next to him.

"Rory?"

"It's the same number as before," she shouted quickly, out of breath from her sprint. She stepped back from the window and the driver took that as a sign to leave.

"No, dude wait, RORY!" He yelled her name out the window but it was too late. The cab was swallowed by a metal sea of traffic. He slowly rolled the window up and settled back in his seat. Beside him, Lily looked awfully smug.

"Who was the girl?"

"Someone very special." And she got nothing else out of him.

Rory nudged the front door open with her foot, as both her arms were carrying her suitcase. She tried to be quiet and let Lorelai sleep, but her mother came bouncing down the stairs.

"My baby's back!" She pounced on her daughter.

"Mom, I was gone for three days."

"I know, what's up with that? I thought you weren't going to be back until Saturday?"

"Oh, just some random stuff came up and I felt like seeing a few friendly faces."

"Does random stuff rhyme with dress and wear a leather jacket?"

"I didn't see the jacket," Rory grinned, picking up her suitcase. Lorelai followed her to her bedroom, somewhat subdued.

"Okay, so what happened? You cleared up the events in your last call, whatnot with the convention and the drugstore. But you didn't tell me how you feel about any of that." Rory shrugged and began unpacking. Lorelai followed her around the room, practically stepping on the backs of her feet. Rory forcefully ignoring her, humming. Humming? Why was she in such a good mood? Even Rory didn't know the answer to that; she just felt like humming.

"Rory!" Her mother yelling snapped Rory out of her happy little humming trance. "What is going on here? Don't ignore me when I say that I am really worried about you. Did Jess hurt you? Break you heart again? Are you two talking? Are you friends? He's not coming back, is he? Are you two together?"

"I don't know." Rory shrugged nonchalantly. "It's all up to him now. It's his decision what to do with the valuable information I gave him."

"Which was?"

"I just told him it's the same number. Relax, why are you wigging out about this?"

"I'm scared! That kid is a mess, and no one deserves to be treated the way he treated you! If you thought I was uncomfortable when you first started dating, now I know what he's like as a boyfriend. And I never want you to get involved in that again."

"Mom, we're not 'involved'. He can call if he wants to, nothing's definite."

"What, are you going to sit around and wait for him to call. You told me the last thing he said to you was 'I'll call'. What makes you think it'll be different this time? It'll be just like when you sat home cleaning your room every Friday and Saturday night, waiting for him to call. He never called, Rory!" Rory stopped walking away from her mother and twirled around so she was facing her.

"I'm not going to sit around pining. I have work to do, and friends to hang out with. I don't know if he'll call. But I'm not that pathetic little girl anymore. And for that matter, Jess is different too! It has been six years, mother. We're not kids anymore. We're adults now! If we want to, we can get our act together and be together! And if we don't, we don't. And you have no say in either option!" Rory grabbed her coat from her bed and flew out the door. Lorelai sighed, and went back upstairs.

The next morning, Lorelai awoke to find a post-it on her forehead. That was their thing, leaving notes like that. If Rory had done it, it must mean things were alright between them. 'Where else?' the note read. Lorelai quickly got dressed and applied some mascara to ensure she looked pretty for Luke, before dashing out the door.

At Lukes, she spotted her daughter sitting at the counter. A throng of townspeople were around her, pressing her for details.

"I've told seven people today, and I called Patty from New York. Nothing happened, we just ran into each other! We're not together, he's not here, nothing's different!" The newshounds looked disappointed, so Lorelai inserted herself into the conversation.

"Rory, Jess called. He wants his boxers back." Rory rolled her eyes in exasperation, as the mass around her began to babble amongst themselves about this new 'development'.

"Thanks a bunch," Rory said sarcastically as Lorelai sat down.

"Anytime. Hey, last night? Wrong. Totally wrong. I should be supporting you no matter what. You're right, I haven't seen Jess in six years, and I don't know what he's like now."

"Thanks," Rory said, this time for real.

"Whatever you do from here, I'm behind you. I'll catch you if you fall, and if you don't, I'll cheer you on. I am now your biggest fan."

"Nice to know." They ordered coffee and ignored the people outside the diner, pointing in at them and gossiping.

"Did the boxers have little hearts on them?" Lorelai asked as they were finishing up.

"Of course."


	7. A big puddle of Jessmush

Even as he smiled falsely and signed copies of his book, Jess couldn't get her off his mind. She'd given him all the cards. He alone could decide to reunite them after all this time. He hated her for doing that. True, she'd just confirmed his suspicions that the number hadn't changed. He could still call her. He could have called her before. He had always known that. That hadn't changed.

What had changed was her permission. He wasn't a hundred percent positive she wanted the ball to start rolling again, but had given her consent. And he couldn't figure out for the life of him what to do.

He was in Los Angles at a signing, the last stop on his tour. Lily had gone home and taken their things with her, and he would drive home in a few hours and be done with this whole experience. He'd go to Sasha and Jimmy's house for dinner, and they'd ask him all about the tour. He'd respond with monosyllables, and Sasha would get so pissed off that she'd ask Lily what was up his ass. Lily would tell her about Rory, and Sasha would never get off his ass to call her. He already knew how this night was going to go. He wasn't looking forward to it at all.

"I totally love your books! I've read all of them! I'm so thrilled to finally meet you!" Jess raised his eyebrows at the girls in front of him. What sickened him, although he also got a kick out of it, was that some of these people read his stuff mainly because of the picture on the inside back cover. If he had been born grossly disfigured, this would not have been a problem. But he was pretty, so he had to deal with posers.

"Who's the girl in the book?" asked another of the girls as she held her book out to be signed. Jess shrugged.

"Read it and find out." She didn't look very happy with that response. He smirked at her as he added the "S" to Danes, and handed her book back.

His psychic powers had been right on the mark. Dinner went exactly as he expected it.

"…and then she knocked on our cab window and told Jess it was the same number as before, and we drove away with Jess yelling her name out the window. The end." Lily smiled innocently at her scowling brother as she finished her tale. Jimmy just raised his eyebrow at his son, and continued eating. Sasha, however, attacked.

"Same number? Who the hell is she Jess?" Jess rubbed his temples. He felt a headache coming on.

"An old friend."

"A 'special' friend," Lily stated, remember what he'd told her in the cab.

"How special? Jess, look at me when I'm talking to you, good boy, how special?"

"Special."

"Special as in lipstick-on-the-collar special, or I'm-going-to-pine-for-you-for-the-rest-of-my-life special?

"How are you distinguishing between the two?"

"Oh. My. God. It's the girl!" Sasha was the brains in the family. She put two and two together where Lily hadn't.

"Is it the small town chick, Jess?" Lily asked excitedly, finally seeing the light once her mother had figured it out. He sighed. He could tolerate Lily when she was being unrelenting, but Sasha would drive him insane.

"Fine. Yes, she's the girl. What else do you need to know about my personal life?"

"Everything," Sasha said, abandoning her meal so she could scoot her chair closer to her step-son. "Did you get laid?"

"This is really not the thing you should talk about at the family dinner table."

"Manners, schmanners. You're a pretty cute guy, Jess. All my girlfriends are wild about you. And yet, I don't think you've gotten some in a while." Jimmy started to protest this topic, but she silenced him with a patented Sasha-stare.

"I have 'gotten some'. Not everyone minds my sandy sheets as much as you."

"Well fine then, you're not gay. Doesn't mean you're living up to your full potential. Call the girl. You'll regret it later if you don't."

"I don't believe in regrets."

"You need to do this. Go get the girl, Jess! She put herself out there for you, and you're being an ass just leaving her hanging." Jess put down his fork with a clank, and stood up.

"It's my life. Don't dare tell me how to live it." He stalked out of the house to his car, and drove home blasting Metallica. He got home and threw his keys on the counter. They skimmed the surface and then flew off. He hadn't realized he threw them that hard. He sank down onto his sofa, staring at the phone. Was this what it was going to be like for the rest of his life? Every time he saw a phone he'd go mad, every time Sasha butted into his life and tried to get him to pick up the damn phone, he'd force her away. He didn't want that. Maybe he'd call, just to make life easier.

He exhaled slowly, deciding that scenario sounded best. Yes, he'd call. But he'd wait a few days. Maybe weeks. He couldn't put it off too long, but he'd do it eventually. And he'd apologize to Sasha. He was in for an ass-whupping as it was.

It had been over a week since the spontaneous cab moment. Rory had stayed true to her word, and not waited for him to call. She'd kept herself busy with writing and other various activities. She'd tried not to think about him, because she knew very well that he might not call. She wouldn't wait her entire life for the phone to ring.

She had allowed herself one simple Jess pleasure, however. She'd bought his book recently, and it sat on her dresser, begging to be opened. She had nothing better to do at the moment. All her other books had been read, her mother and Lane were working, there was nothing on TV, and she'd been writing all morning.

She walked around the empty house, desperately trying to find something else to do. She was scared that opening the book would turn her into a big puddle of Jess-mush. But in the end, boredom sucked. And she really wanted to read the book- Jess was a good writer. A little peek wouldn't hurt…

She sat down on her bed, and picked up the book again. She rolled onto her stomach and tried to get comfortable. Not working. She sat at her desk chair. Once again, wrong. She moved throughout her entire house, even her mother's room and the bathrooms, trying to find a good spot and position to read in. 'Get over it, Gilmore. You're being stupid. You can read anywhere; it's your nerves that are making you uncomfortable.'

Suddenly, she realized where she wanted to read. Cliché as it sounds, she just knew. She walked to the bridge with the book in her back pocket, a habit she'd picked up from him. She smiled at neighbors as she passed them, not stopping to make small talk with any of them. The rumors about her and Jess were beginning to disappear as nothing new had happened, and she could now walk around town without every pair of eyes watching her, trying to see if Jess had left any visible evidence on her. Bite marks, hickeys, Babette had told everyone to be on the lookout for all of them.

She reached the bridge and lay down on the stiff planks. Her back liked the hard, flat surface, and her face liked the spring sun spilling down. She opened the book and placed it where it shielded the ultraviolet rays from her eyes. There was no dedication. She hadn't been expecting one for some reason. She turned to the first page and began to read the forward.

"_I was born on a bus. This may seem an unusual way to start a book, but it's true. I was born on a bus heading towards New York Presbyterian, the Columbia branch. My parents, you see, were not the smartest of people. My mother, Lisa, had wanted to wait for her younger brother, Robert, to get there. My father, James, had stood back and let her. When my uncle finally arrived, the genius that would soon give birth to me loaded her family on a crowded bus. Instead of taking a taxi, or my uncle's truck, she thought it would be easiest to take the bus. _

_My mother was, and is, and idiot. _

_I was born on 165th, at 5:11 PM. Rush hour. I've never had the best timing. _

_Now I get along to explaining why I started off this way. My life has had three phases, each of which has monumentally shaped me in some way. Each of those phases took place in a different location. Firstly, I grew up in New York. I learned how to fight, shoplift, smoke, and curse in that city. For seventeen years I rattled around the city, getting into trouble. My previously mentioned brilliant mother did nothing to stop me from careening out of control. I almost feel like I should hate her for that. But she was just as lost as me, if not more. She couldn't take care of herself, much less me. _

_If you're wondering where my father is while I'm self-destructing in the Big Apple, I'll come back to that. I've got a whole book ahead of me to explain, and I plan to use it accordingly. _

_Finally, she wised up. Recent events in her life prompted her to try and get clean, to mellow out a little. She couldn't do that with me coming in at all hours of the night, smelling like Mary Jane and Jack Daniels. So she dumped me on a relative. _

_I hadn't seen my uncle Robert since I was born. And I was probably focusing just as much on the other bus-riders as him at the time. So she was shipping me off to a complete stranger. _

_To make matters worse, Robert lived in the fiery pits of hell. Any mail sent there, however, would have the words "Taylorsville Connecticut" stamped on them. Don't bother looking it up on a map. Did you think I was stupid enough to use real names and places? If so, you haven't read my other works. Which would lead me to question why you're reading my autobiography. _

_I got to Connecticut by bus. The second major phase of my life, and I entered by bus. See where I'm going with this bus theme? The second I stepped off that bus, I knew my life was officially going to, for lack of better term, suck. _

_Children ran down the sidewalk with flowers in their hair, and their mothers laughed and called after them. The friendly townspeople stood on ladders in the streets, hanging garlands of leaves from lampposts. It was such a contrast to the cold apartment building I was used to, I wanted to heave. All over their perfectly-cut, green lawns. I would have too, if my uncle Robert hadn't dragged me back to his home. _

_He owned and managed a small diner, which I came to find out, was the main center of nourishment for the townsfolk. Above the diner, he had a miniscule apartment and an inflatable mattress just for me. He had no idea how to take care of a teenager, much less a rebel-without-a-cause like myself. _

_I was contemplating getting back on a fateful bus, going to Canada, and letting Robert and Lisa wonder where I was. But on my second night there my life completely changed, even though I didn't know it at the time. _

_Her name was Lauren. Not really, but I'll call her Lauren. She had the brightest blue eyes I've ever seen, and her hair was brown and silky. I didn't actually get to touch it for quite some time. But you could see its silkiness. _

_I'll come back to Lauren later. Trust me, you'll know her inside and out by the time I'm done. But she made Taylorsville bearable. She made it the second noteworthy phase of my life. _

…_So why would I leave, if she was that incredible? Allow me to search deep inside my soul for a minute, and try and figure that one out. To be honest, it was a lot of everything. I was running scared. Being in love for the first time is scary. And I was desperate- Robert had basically kicked me out, and the entire town was against me. Lauren cared, but her best friend in the world, her mother Lana, was even more hostile towards me than anyone. Well, except for Lauren's moronic ex-boyfriend. _

_So for whatever reasons, I found myself on a bus to California. Bus, third phase. That's where I find myself now. I'm lying on the beach, completely soaked and fully dressed. I've been trying to muster up the courage to being writing this book for a few months. _

_One thing led to another, my stepmother being obnoxious in her own caring way, and my publisher breathing down my back. My girlfriend of three weeks breaking up with me did nothing to appease the situation. So I took a deep breath, ran out along the dock down the street, and dove in the freezing surf. _

_I swam back to shore, exhausted, and am composing this part of the book in my head. Above I can see the Big Dipper, and something that looks like a snake. I'm not well versed in constellations, so I don't know what it is. Mental note: look up stars. _

_And now you know what happens. I've just spoiled the plot for you. Cry about it. _

_But if you're still here, I think I do a damn good job of telling the rest of my story…"_

Rory smiled as she looked up from the book. She realized there was a lot she didn't know about Jess, specifically anything in his New York and California 'phases'. She looked back at the book, and began to read the first chapter.

Sasha walked through Jess's house, muttering to herself. There was sand all over. The sheets, the shower, the carpet, you name it. Jess spent a great deal of his time outside, and he never gave a damn about dragging the beach inside with him. It was a springboard for their never-ending arguments.

Things with her and her step-son hadn't been that good since he stormed out of her house a month ago. She'd unknowingly touched a nerve, and it was because of this girl he wouldn't talk about. She'd read his book. She knew all about this girl. He hadn't held back relaying their relationship. He just hadn't gone into depth about his emotions at the time. Typical guy…

She hated to see him like that, and she hated him being cold towards her. She sighed aloud, and noticed something on the counter. It was a single sheaf of paper. Normally, he had stacks lying around, full of ideas and musings and the first chapters of many never-continued books.

She curiously picked it up and read it, eyebrows raised. This was Jess, so you never knew what he could be up to.

Sasha,

I'm sorry for being such an ass of late. You were right on everything, but I'm not going to list all the ways. I've got a little too much self-respect to do that.

In case you didn't know, I am fucking INSANE. You'd probably be the first to agree, but this is insanity on a whole new level. I'm seriously looking at what I just wrote, counting the days until I start hearing voices and seeing dead relatives. I think Lizzies's parents are over there in the corner right now.

God, I'm so insane. I'm beyond insane. I'm fucking deranged. Send the highway patrol out after me so they can stop me before I do something crazy, because that's where I'm headed. I need to be put in a loony bin. I'm scaring myself.

The damn phone is mocking me. And you were right. Not about the sand, but about Rory.

When you read this, I'll be on a bus heading for Connecticuit. I can't call her. Her mother might answer, and that would be bad. I have to see her again. You were right.

I'm insane.

Jess

Sasha smiled and laughed heartily.

**Thank you to the people that did review! I got more reviews in the beginning and now I'm not sure if people are lazy (lord knows I've been there myself, even when reading something awesome), or if there's a disinterest. This is not a ploy to get you to review; it is solely a curious inquiry. …okay fine, maybe it is a ploy to get you to review. pathetic look pwease?**


	8. You're killing me just standing there

**Yay! My evil plan worked – I got uber amounts of reviews! Let's keep it up people, shall we? wink wink nudge nudge **

**lora: I know, I always thought Luke was older…but Liz didn't have Jess as a teenager, and I don't think Luke is that much older than Lorelai. Liz was more than likely in her very early twenties when she had Jess, which would make her in her late thirties or possibly early forties when she was on the show. And if Luke was older, that would put him in his early-to-mid forties, when Lorelai is still just about 35. That's about a ten year difference. Sorry, I'm kind of a math freak, and that whole thing made so much more sense in my head, but I figured that Luke isn't that old. Which would make him younger. **

**Emily: THAT'S OKAY I'M GLAD YOU LIKE MY WRITING! **

**rubberdukki: Why wouldn't Jess be listening to Metallica? He was a fan on the show, because he had the t-shirt that Luke hated. **

**tado: There's another short scene from Jess's book. Look down. OOOOH, italics!**

**Everyone: In my story, Jess never came back to Star's Hollow those two times. So he never told Rory he loved her, and never asked her to come with him. I have chosen to include some of those themes in the coming chapters. Hope you like! Also, I'm glad everyone seemed to like Jess's book. It was fun to write. **

**I hurried to get this chapter written and up because I felt bad leaving you guys hanging with Jess's note there. I hope you like! Now I must go rest as I am tired of typing and staring at the screen. **

"_As far as girls go, she was nothing special. Thin, a few inches shorter than me, blue eyes (pretty, but not every man swooned under their gaze), brown hair. Smart, funny, cute. She was special to me, but not everyone could see it. _

_Someone who couldn't appreciate how special she truly was, had just gotten lucky, was her boyfriend Dan. They didn't come much dimmer than him. Dim Dan. But she clutched onto him for stability and consistence. Her whole life revolved around stability and consistence. From the moment I saw her, I wanted to ruin her. I wanted to make her spontaneous, wild, and unpredictable. _

_As I got to know her, I wanted less and less to 'ruin' her, and just wanted to help her let loose. That changed into simply wanting to be with her, which ended in me being the changed one. Irony is a bitch. _

_Lana let Robert and myself into her house, and the two stayed in the doorway to flirt while I wandered around. There was a picture on the mantle of a nice looking girl. Bored, I picked it up. Not bad. Not my type, but not bad at all. _

_I walked into her room a few minutes later, as Lana led us into the kitchen. Her room was directly off the kitchen. That was a little weird. She was sitting at her computer, typing something for school. She turned around and smiled at me, and I felt welcomed for the first time in that town…" _

Rory smiled as she read that passage. She'd long since finished the book, twice, but she returned to the pages she'd dog-eared many times. It was flattering, being mentioned in such a great book. And it was exhilarating, getting into his head like that. She looked at the doorway, remembering him swagger in that night. Their conversation replayed itself in her head. She remembered it perfectly. His book had left out the hooked-on-phonics comment. But other than that, it was accurate.

True to her word, she'd let Lorelai read one of Jess's books. NOT that one. She'd given her Bus Fare, a story about Mexican immigrants. Lorelai hadn't enjoyed it that much. Reading was not her forte.

The phone rang, and brought Rory out of her thoughts. She'd been staring at the window, remembering. "So do these open?" "Oh yea, you just have to unlatch them and then push,"…

"Hello?"

"It's mom, get down here now!"

"Where would here be?"

"Luke's, hurry!"

"What's going on?" Rory asked, looking for her shoes.

"Luke is about to THROTTLE Taylor!"

"Big Luke and Taylor, little Luke and Taylor, or a combination of the two?"

"Big! Run!" Rory hung up and ran out the door, eager to see what was going on. She raced down her street, stopping to wave to Babette.

"What's the rush, baby doll?" the blonde woman called after her.

"Luke. Taylor. Throttling!" she yelled, and when she looked over her shoulder a few seconds later, Babette was also running to Luke's.

Just as she reached the square, and saw the mob beginning to gather outside of Luke's, she saw someone sitting in the gazebo. Someone with dark hair, and it looked like they were reading. She slowed to a walk, staring at the person. Her eyes must be playing tricks on her…not call for a month, and then he shows up in Star's Hollow? Or Taylorsville, as she sometimes found herself referring to it as now. She stopped all together, and heard Babette exclaim "Oh my God!" in her raspy voice behind her.

He didn't look up. He appeared completely absorbed in whatever he was reading. But she was sure it was him now- there was no mistaking those sharp cheek bones, or that strong jaw. She took a deep breath, and began walking towards the gazebo. She got all the way there without him looking up. She hesitantly knocked on a wooden pillar in the supports, and he finally met her eye.

"Jess."

"Rory."

"Come here much?"

"Not really." A pregnant pause settled on them.

"You never called."

"I was scared to," he admitted. He closed the book and stood up.

"So…you're too scared to call me, but you have no qualms about traveling across the country to surprise me in my hometown?"

"When you said it was the same number, I figured you still lived here."

"Why are you here, Jess?" she asked, her mouth suddenly very dry.

"I'm insane?"

"Yes, you are. I can't believe you're actually here, standing there, with everyone just down the street at Luke's."

"I actually figured you'd be there too. The plan was to wait until people started leaving, and catch you on your way out. I didn't want to go to your house. Lorelai might catch me, and do something crazy."

"Well, she is Lorelai, so I'd say there's an excellent chance." There was silence again.

"Jess, you're killing me just standing there. What do you want?"

"What did you want when you stopped me leaving the hotel?"

"I don't know what I wanted, I wasn't thinking."

"Well, my reasoning is kind of along the same lines." She nodded, and nudged an imaginary spot on the wooden floor with her toe.

"What now?"

"I have no idea."

"Well, we're screwed then. Babette saw you, so in minutes the entire town will be out here, expecting us to be fucking in the gazebo." He raised his eyebrows. He'd never heard her speak crudely before.

"I see. We should go then." He anticipated her refusing him, but instead she shrugged.

"Probably yes. I don't want any more rumors flying around." He nodded, and they strolled off, subconsciously heading towards their bridge.

Elsewhere, Babette had stopped short of shouting out her news. Luke being held back by Dean and Kirk, as Taylor stood there looking distraught, held her attention for a few minutes.

"I will NEVER, ever tie up live animals outside my diner! You've gone off the deep end with this one, Taylor!"

Luke. That jogged her memory. Jess!

"Everyone, shut the hell up!" she screamed. The gathering of people in and outside the diner turned to look at her for a minute.

"This is all very entertaining, Luke and Taylor, but you're not gonna believe what I just saw! Jess, in the gazebo!" Astonished mumbling poured forth from the people, as Kirk let out a short scream.

"Babette, sweetie, tell us everything!" Patty exclaimed, pulling tiny Babette into the doorway of the diner. Even Luke and Taylor looked at her expectantly.

"I was just on my front porch, filling up my hummingbird feeder! And Rory goes running past, screaming about Luke and Taylor, so I drop the feeder and hightail it downtown! And Rory's ahead of me, but then she stops and is staring at the gazebo, and there he is! Sitting there like he owns the place! That's all I saw, I ran in here to tell you, and I just looked back and they're both GONE!"

Lorelai looked visibly shocked as everyone but Taylor, Dean, Luke, Patty, and herself departed, looking for the two. Taylor brushed himself off, and then followed them out.

"Lorealai, do you have any idea where they'd be?"

"Uh, no I don't actually." She laughed nervously. "But you could go check my house." Patty's eyes lit up, and she hustled out the door as fast as her bulk would allow. Lorelai, Luke, and Dean were the only ones left in the diner.

"So, he's back?" Dean asked, sounding bitter.

"Don't look at me. Lorelai, did Rory say anything to you?"

"No, she didn't. And I'm incredibly confused as to WHY he's here like this."

"Do you know where they are?" She sighed.

"Yea."

Rory and Jess were sitting on the bridge, legs dangling over the side, both quiet.

"So...how's California?"

"Sunny."

"I see. You're going to have to do some of the talking if you want to hold my attention, you know that?"

"I know."

"Good." They stared at each other. "Talk."

"What about?"

"I don't know. Is there anything that you've been dying to tell me for six years? Like why you left? I mean, I know I read it in your book, but I think I deserve to hear it straight from you."

"You read my book." A smile curved his lips upward, and she returned it.

"I did."

"Did you like it?"

"It was very accurate. And well written. And informative- I didn't know half that stuff about you."

"Did you have any problems with my portrayal of you or Star's Hollow?"

"You mean Taylorsville," she teased. He snorted good naturedly as she turned so she was facing him, and folded her legs Indian-style.

"Can I ask you something?"

"I'm not stopping you."

"Did you ever think I'd read it? I mean, even if we didn't meet, you're a pretty renowned author, and I would have recognized the plot sooner or later."

"I didn't think you'd read it."

"Ah. And if I had, what would the plan have been?"

"I wouldn't have known if you did read it."

"Okay, say I'm walking around in Andrew's store. Oh, look. J. M. Danes. He's a decent writer. I think I'll read this. I buy it. I take it home. I put it in my pile of books to read. A few weeks later, I get around to starting it. I distinctly hear your echoes, but think I'm imagining it. Then I get to the part where you steal my copy of Howl. A light bulb goes on over my head. I call your publisher, not hard because I have one too, and get your number. I call you and now you finish the story."

"That was very good presentation. Write many telegrams lately?"

"Jess, I'm serious," she laughed, hitting his arm lightly. He looked at the spot where her hand had touched him, and she felt self-conscious. What was she doing touching him? She needed to keep her wits about her. Touching Jess in any way, shape, or form was NOT the way to accomplish that.

"I don't know. If you had made the effort to reach me, I would have been polite at least." He stared hard into the depths of the lake while Rory watched him intently.

"All it would have taken was a few calls. You drove across the country."

"Actually, I took the bus." He looked back at her, hearing her laugh. It took a few minutes for her to compose herself.

"Were you really born on a bus?"


	9. There is no logic

**Green Eve: Thank you so much for your review…once I saw your name on it, I remembered that you were the one who wrote _Shivery_, and I completely lost it. I adore your story, and it means so much to me that a writer like you, who is obviously going to go on to have an excellent career in that field if desired, took the time to read and review something I wrote. **

**S0m3thing-Pr3tty: Yes! I actually thought the shirt DID bring out his eyes…**

**mandraco: I'm brilliant! Thank you, because 'blonde' and 'weird' are the adjectives I normally have thrown my way. I've never been called brilliant before…**

Lorelai lead the small search party that was herself, Luke, and Dean down towards the bridge. As she walked, townspeople attached themselves to the group, until they were about to turn the corner and see the bridge. By then, there was an upwards of thirty anxious people. Lorelai took a deep breath. 'Whatever you do from here, I'm behind you.' She needed to keep this promise, for her own mental health, and for her daughter's trust.

The residents of Star's Hollow saw the bridge, and the scene unfolding on it. Rory and Jess sat directly beside each other, looking like a pair of young lovers oblivious to everyone else. Jess said something that caused Rory to laugh wholeheartedly, her head tipping back and her brown hair spilling out behind her. Her reaction made Jess smile, an actual smile. Lorelai hadn't seen that near enough times to remember what it looked like. Seeing the two of them, happy, thawed her heart a little.

"Um, maybe we should go," she suggested. But it was no use. Miss Patty had seen the parade of people headed for the lake.

"Don't just stand there! Go talk to her!" she yelled at Lorelai. A few hundred feet away, Rory snapped her head around, the smile disappearing from her face as she saw her neighbors. Jess scowled and stood up.

"How can you stand this place, Rory?" he asked, helping her stand.

"They mean well. Though I'm not very fond of them myself right about now."

"Why not? Why aren't you fond of them?"

"Meaning?"

"Did they walk in on something you're embarrassed about?"

"Of course not!"

"Did you want something to happen that they stopped?"

"Something, yes, depending on what something is,"

"What did you want to happen?"

"I-I wanted to keep talking to you! I like talking to you! I haven't talked to you in forever!"

"Why did you give me your number?"

"Is there a pattern to these questions?"

"Damn it, Rory! Why?"

"Because I missed you!"

"Missed me how?"

"Damn it, Jess!" she mocked him. "I have no idea where you're going with this!"

"I'm going home. I should have known not to come here. Nothing could ever work here."

"Oh. Well then go! See if I care! I'm not hurt because you're leaving again!"

"Come with me."

"Wh-what?"

"Nothing could ever work here. Come to California. It's nice, you'd like it. Sun, sand, nice people."

"You are not saying that. This is a really weird dream that I am going to wake up from, and I'm never ever eating an entire pack of Slim Jims right before bed again!"

"If you don't like it, I'll get you home, no questions asked."

"You're acting like I'm actually going to consider this."

"Why won't you?"

"Because it's crazy! I have a life, and family, and friends, and work, all here!"

"I'm not asking you to move to California, I'm just saying come hang out for a few days, maybe a few weeks."

"You want me to come to California to hang out? What is wrong with you? Are you doing drugs?"

"You missed me. I missed you. The logic's all there."

"NO, there is no logic! They were all right! You treated me like dirt, Jess!"

"I've changed, Rory! I'll prove it to you if you come with me! I know you want to, just screw logic, say yes!"

"I have responsibilities, I have obligations!"

"All of which, if they aren't portable, will be there for you when you get back! You can write just as well on the beach as you can here!"

"Why do you want me to come?"

"Because as I sat alone in my yard, writing a book about you, I thought to myself, 'I was really happy back then. I haven't been happy like that in a damn Long TIME!" he yelled, getting louder with each word. The audience watched the interaction, stunned. They'd mostly just seen Rory waving her arms and Jess running his hands through his hair, but now they could hear. Lorelai watched, repeating her mantra 'I'm behind you' over and over in her head. Dean looked on, enraged.

"I can't."

"See, now you're out of reasons as to WHY you 'can't' come with me. You can! There's no physical reasons why you can't, so it must all be in your head."

"I'll go pack!" she yelled suddenly, angrily. He stopped short of saying whatever had been about to slip off his tongue.

"What?"

"You want me to come so much, so I'm coming! So I don't lay in my bed tonight and every other night for the rest of my life, thinking 'what would have happened if I'd gone with Jess?'"

"Okay then. You're coming with me," he confirmed, not quite ready to believe it.

"I said I was, didn't I?" she asked crossly. She turned on her heel and stomped off past the group of open-mouthed townspeople. She backtracked a few steps.

"Mom, I'm going to California for a few days!" she yelled, still mad. She stormed off to pack. The entire town turned to Jess as one. Slowly they approached him and Jess contemplated diving into the lake to escape. But Lorelai was already standing in front of him.

"What the hell was that?"

"I'm still reeling myself."

"She's going with you?"

"You heard her."

"Why?"

"Because we both know she wants to." Lorelai crossed her arms and looked down, pouting. Dean took that as a sign to step forward.

"You're just going to hurt her again. I won't let you do that."

"What, are you two back together or something?"

"What? No, no I'm married. But I still care about Rory, and that's why you are going to leave, and I'm going to go talk some sense into her."

"Like I'm going to leave now."

"No one wants you here."

"Well, lucky for them, I was just leaving."

"You bastard, I could kill you for just standing there and acting like you didn't do anything wrong!" Dean practically lunged at Jess before Luke restrained him. Shaking Luke off, Dean angrily shouldered Jess as he pushed past him and walked off the bridge. The rest of Star's Hollow followed him, shooting Jess curious glances, until Luke and Lorelai were the only ones left. Jess looked down at his shoes as Luke spoke.

"When did it seem like a good idea to show your face in this town again?"

"Not you too."

"I mean, what happened? You just woke up under your bridge in California and wondered how Rory was doing?"

"To an extent. Although, I don't live under a bridge."

"I've always wondered what I'd say to you if you came back. You walked out on me, and Rory. The only two people who gave a shit about what you did with your life. And now, guess what? I have nothing to say to you." Luke followed the stragglers off.

"He'll come around."

"Excuse me?"

"Jess, I used to hate you. And now I don't know you. And Rory is being completely un-Rory-like. I don't know what to do. Can't I at least be nice until I figure out how to react?"

"Sure," he replied hesitantly, wondering if Lorelai was going to have a breakdown right in front of him.

"Just…don't hurt her. I'll kick your ass if you do." And with that, Jess was again alone.

Beach. Warm. Shorts and tank tops. Rory stood at her dresser, grabbing clothes, holding them up, and tossing them over her shoulder. Everything was weather inappropriate, or boring. Hey, she was getting a free trip to California. If whatever Jess had in mind when he made his crazy proposal didn't work out, she could meet some sexy Cali surfers. OC anyone?

She deposited a pink spaghetti-strap top in her duffel bag, and began looking for her swim suit. She owned two, not counting the eight others she could borrow from Lorelai. One was a conservative, one-piece, navy-blue. The other was much more…enticing.

Lane and Rory had been shopping in Hartford one day for some cute underwear. It was Lane and Dave's anniversary, and Lane wanted to look sexy for him. Rory and Lane had enjoyed a fun girls-day-out wandering around the lingerie store, picking out the most ludicrous items. Lane had gotten several alluring pieces, but Rory had only fallen in love with one piece. It was a tiny black bikini, and to be honest, she'd only tried it on because Lane had dared her to.

Looking at herself in the mirror in the elegant red dressing room, she'd stopped feeling like the homely author who still lived with her mother. She felt like a woman. And she'd liked that feeling. So she bought the suit.

She gently placed both suits in her bag. Questions that she should have asked Jess before she agreed to come with him raced through her mind. Where was she staying? Were they really taking the bus to California? And the most important- what exactly were they? It was far from a romantic excursion, but she didn't think he really just wanted to 'hang out'. Did he just want to talk? Did he want to prove to her that he'd left her for a better life after all? Or did he want to reconcile?

Her thoughts were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. She turned to see her mother standing in her doorway.

"Hey," Rory greeted her, pretending she didn't see the tears threatening to fall from her mother's eyes.

"Why are you going with him, Rory?"

"I can't answer that until I've actually gone with him."

"Nothing good can happen here, Rory. He either takes you away and dumps you again, or takes you away and you fall in love and then he dumps you again. Either way, you get dumped."

"Have a little faith in the guy, will you?"

"I don't like this Rory. I can't stop you from going, but I can tell you that I wish you wouldn't do this, and hope you come to your senses."

"What was all that crap about your being behind me then? Did you mean, you're behind me while I'm staying with you and doing what you want, but not when I decide to throw caution to the wind and just find out something about myself, about Jess?"

"I am behind you. I just wish you'd reconsider."

"I'm not going to." She zipped up her bag, stuffed full of clothes, and took a smaller bag out of her closet. She began to walk around her room, dropping books and CD's into it. Lorelai sat down on her bed and watched her move about.

"Don't forget underwear," she joked weakly. Rory smiled at her and sighed.

"Everything's going to be fine, Mom. I'll be back in about a week. I won't do anything stupid." She put her laptop containing notes for her next book on top of the other things, and closed that bag too.

"Is Jess still at the bridge?"

"Most likely. He's public enemy number one, now."

Rory deposited her bags by the back door, and walked off towards the bridge. Lorelai hesitated and ran after her.

"Are you going to get back together with Jess?"

"How should I know? We haven't talked about it yet."

"You're going to, aren't you?"

"I said I didn't know, mother."

"But that's not what your body language says. You're screaming 'wow, me and Jess all alone on a beach…'"

"My body is not saying that!"

"If it wasn't happening to my daughter and the boy who broke her heart, I'd think it was terribly romantic."

"You're annoying me. Maybe nothing will happen, and I'll just come back confident that we're NOT meant to be together, and get on with my life."

"Here's hoping," Lorelai joked sadly.

"I will call you when I get there, and if anything major happens. I will be home soon. And I will not do anything naughty on a beach, so stop looking at me like that!" Lorelai laughed her real laugh for the first time in that conversation.

Rory got to the bridge and found him sitting and reading.

"I hope my adoring public wasn't too hard on you," she remarked as she sat down. He bookmarked his spot and looked over at her.

"That is why we need to leave."

"You don't have to try and convince me again, I haven't changed my mind."

"You're packed?"

"It's on my porch. Do you have any idea how we're getting there?"

"Greyhound."

"Of course. When?"

"Next bus leaves in seventeen minutes," he offered, taking a folded bus schedule out of his pocket.

"That soon?"

"Second-to-next bus leaves tomorrow morning." Rory debated this. She hadn't wanted to leave IMMEDIATELY. But Lorelai wouldn't be too thrilled about Jess crashing on the couch tonight. And no one else would think of letting him stay with them.

"Come on," she stated, sighing and standing up. He mirrored her, and they stood there for a minute, staring at the other one.

"You know we need to talk," she commented. He nodded.

"Once we get there, we'll talk. For the time being, we're two old friends, catching up." She grinned and took his arm, as they began walking back towards her house and her bags.

"So tell me more about your step mom."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o...R/J goodness!**


	10. It wasn't a dream

**Whoa…I was going through some of the older fics on the site, and I found a story that used the exact same penname for Jess, and almost the same one for Rory (they hyphenated the last name so it was Gilmore-Hayden). Freaky… Now I feel bad because they had the names first. 'Neways, onwards and forwards. **

**JediPirateElfyDude:glomps: My 100th review! WOOT WOOT! **

**Everyone else: I'm beyond elated that there's any interest in my story at all, much less this much. You guys make my day every time there's a review alert in my mailbox. **

**So here we go; our two favorite characters are on their way to the sunny state! **

The entire population of Star's Hollow, it seemed, had stood in the square to watch the bus go by. Rory remembered a few faces standing out in the crowd. Dean had practically been shaking as Lindsey tried to calm him down, using obviously soothing words and gestures.

Luke had looked like a little lost kid. Jess may not have been his favorite person, but he loved the kid like his own son. He'd taken him in when no one else wanted him, he'd busted his ass over and over trying to convince him that he deserved so much better than a life working for Wal-mart, and he'd never gotten to say goodbye to Jess. Seeing his nephew board that bus brought him back to seven years ago, right after he'd thrown Jess out. He held his jaw stiffly as it disappeared in the distance.

Lorelai stood next to Luke, rubbing his back. She was still confused as to WHY. Why had Jess just shown up, why had Rory gone with him, and why she wasn't more disturbed. She should have dragged her off that bus herself, but then she'd watched Jess pick up Rory's bags and motion for her to go first. He'd been the perfect gentleman. He'd been like Luke. And that comforted her to the point where she almost trusted the twerp with her daughter.

After Rory had seen her town and her friends get smaller and smaller and then too far away to see, they'd spent the first half hour of their trip arguing over what book to read. The other riders moved down a few seats so as to get further away from the violent intellectual bickering, and by the time they'd picked Slaughterhouse Five, they were all but alone.

Jess read aloud as Rory rested her head on his shoulder, listening to him. She faced the seatback in front of her, but her attention did not waver from his voice. After a few hours, he closed the book and looked at the girl next to him. Rory had fallen asleep just as Billy Pilgrim had entered Dresden dressed in his toga and silver boots. He'd felt her sink into him and known she was sleeping, but he kept reading lest she wake up and find him studying her face. He was sure she was deep enough submerged in whatever Rory Gilmore dreamed about by now that he could freely stare at her.

She hadn't changed much. Her hair was about as short as it had been when they first met, and she was curling it now. He liked it. Her face and body were, if different, more defined. Her style had changed as well. She used to favor more traditional clothes. Button-down shirts, lose jeans, and sweaters. She'd never shown her belly, let alone any of her fashionably smaller chest.

She wasn't dressing skanky now at all. But she was wearing a skirt that ended far above her knees, and red tights. Her top was tighter than she'd worn in high school. She was a woman now, and a damn beautiful one at that. Jess could only hope he'd changed enough for her to consider her a man.

He still didn't know what he'd been thinking. Every time he asked himself that question on the way to Star's Hollow, he'd just shushed the voice in his head with an 'I'm insane', and acted like that was all the reasoning he needed. They'd been getting along, when the stupid small town freaks had to walk in on them. And he'd asked her to come with him. If that wasn't proof that he really was insane, nothing was.

The even more insane thing was that she'd said yes. Jess recalled a quote from some piece reading that crazy people will always find each other. She'd said yes in front of her mother and all her friends, so they were proving it true.

Jess had no idea what to do from here on out. He'd bring her home, show her around, introduce her to his family only after threatening Sasha with misery and woe if she embarrassed him or Rory. He could bring her to his favorite public beach in the morning before the crowds arrived, and he could let her play on his tiny strip of private beach that had come with the house. He even had a small guest room she could stay in. It wasn't much, but it had a bed.

He had worked everything out in his head while mindlessly reading. All the details and fine points would work out. He was certain that Rory would have a great time. They'd catch up and have fun whilst.

The only problem was that Rory was not the kind of girl he could just be friends with. She fit into her own category, one that Jess had failed to notice until it was too late. He'd fallen for her when he suspected that there was no chance of ever getting her. And as much as he didn't want to toy with Rory's emotions, he needed to know how she felt about him. His feelings hadn't changed much. You'd think they would, but seeing her in New York, and in the gazebo, was as thrilling as it had been. They had no relationship anymore, but the feelings that could be built upon were still there, at least on his side. So he approached California with absolutely no idea what lay in store for them. And, he realized, he couldn't control it. So he sat back and let Rory sleep on him.

Rory awoke sometime later, her head in Jess's lap. His eyes above were closed, but his fingers slowly moved throughout her hair, playing with it. She tried to be as still as possible as she enjoyed her position for a moment. She was lying flat on her back, with her head on Jess's thigh. It felt very solid, for lack of better adjective.

"You awake?" he asked, still not opening his eyes.

"Finally. I had the weirdest dream that Jess Mariano came to Star's Hollow and convinced me to run away to California with him. Oh look, it wasn't a dream. Hi Jess."

"Hi Rory. Did you sleep okay?" He finally opened his eyes and looked at the girl in his lap.

"Fine. Why am I down here?"

"You fell when the bus hit a bump, and I was trying to help you up, but you pushed my hand away and made yourself comfortable." She blushed, but smiled at him. He started to move his legs, so she quickly pulled herself up.

"Well, thanks for being my pillow."

"Any time." Another of those weirdly comfortable silences descended upon them.

"So, where do I get to stay in California?"

"I have a guest room."

"No!" she feigned surprise.

"It has a bed and a chair."

"You Suzy homemaker, you!" she accused jokingly. He rolled his eyes.

"I think I liked you better asleep."

They changed buses and continued reading. Jess finished Slaughterhouse Five, and Rory began reading The Namesake. He copied her by resting his head on her shoulder as she read, and felt her tense as she felt the weight. He waited a few minutes. She grew accustomed to it, and finally relaxed so that they were both comfortable. Jess ran through this information in his head. She was jumpy around him. She could be afraid of him, or she could be keyed up. For the love of all that was holy, Jess hoped for the second one.

The rest of the ride was uneventful. They read to each other, slept in shifts, listened to Rory's walkman until the batteries ran out, ate horrible rest stop junk food, and talked. They talked about Star's Hollow (for an entire eight minutes before Jess was bored), their careers and the books each was writing now, good old times before Jimmy had shown up in Star's Hollow, and what they were going to do in California. Certain necessary questions, though weighing heavily on each one's mind, were not ventured. Questions like were they involved on any level. The farthest they'd dived into the topic of romance was to inquire whether each had a significant other. Neither did, interestingly enough. At the moment, they'd moved on to the topic of Dean.

"So wait, you and Dean?"

"…dated while he was married to Lindsey. Dumb, I know. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Just dated?"

"Excuse me, that's a little personal."

"I want to know if Dean was a big enough slime ball to cheat on his wife."

"That would imply me being a slime ball too."

"But you look good in slime." Rory smiled and changed the subject to one they had been discussing earlier: Remember when.

"Oooh, remember when Luke or Lorelai or Caesar came upstairs every ten minutes to check on us and claim they had to get something?" Thankfully, he caught on. She didn't want to answer him. He wouldn't make her.

"Yea, and we finally got that old dinging timer out so we'd know when they were coming up. Ten minutes, on the dot." They both laughed, reminiscing.

"I think we're here." The bus had pulled up near the boardwalk, and Jess stood. Rory followed his lead, and they collected her luggage and got off the bus.

"Where to now?" she asked. He shrugged. "You're already a bad guide."

"Want to drop your stuff off first? Then we can go get some real food, and when I say real food, I mean hot dogs." She nodded, taking in the atmosphere. It was big and busy and beautiful. The noise assaulted her pleasantly, and everything seemed to smell delicious whether it was edible or not.

They headed off towards Jess's house as the sky slowly changed colors in the background. They'd gotten there just before sunset.

"It's beautiful," Rory breathed. Jess agreed, while looking sideways at her. They walked on quietly until she broke the silence.

"Me and Dean didn't just date."

"Huh."

"Is that all you can say?"

"Do you want me to reprimand you?"

"Everyone treated me like the town whore for months. I figured you'd at least shake your finger at me." He did just that, to humor her.

"Oh, you're cute."

"I know. I'm surprised, though. I didn't think you had it in you."

"I'm braver now," she said, turning and walking sideways so she could look directly at him. He just smiled and stared at the path ahead. It was a few miles walk from the bus stop to his house.

By the time they reached his house, it was getting dark. And miss Rory was complaining.

"Why couldn't you live closer to town?"

"I just live a few miles up the coast, it's not that far." She stuck her tongue out at him and crossed her arms across her stomach. He was carrying not only her bags, but her shoes as well, and he wasn't wining.

"Okay, do you have a car?"

"Yes."

"Does it run?"

"Yes."

"Then we're taking it back to get hot dogs. No buts."

"No one drives around here. We'll look like tourists."

"My feet are going to fall off."

"Drama queen."

"A queen shouldn't have to walk." He sighed loudly and exaggeratedly.

"Fine. We will drive." She gave him a quick, friendly hug as they reached his house and she looked around, open-mouthed.

"Wow." It wasn't much. A simple, decent-sized, white, one-story beach house with sand instead of grass. He led the way along a stone path partially hidden by the sand, to the back of the house. Rory gasped openly now. The ocean rolled up the small beach, closed in by a jetty on both sides.

"It's private," he commented nonchalantly, seeing her staring at the water. The house was small, but the property was beautiful. He walked past his hammock to the back door, and took the key from above the door. Opening it quickly, he pushed the door with his foot, and they entered his living room. She stopped to brush sand off her feet, and he shook his head.

"Don't worry about it. The only one who minds is my step-mom." She smiled and finished the task anyway, and walked fully into the house. He set her bags down on the couch as she wandered around, taking everything in. The furniture was light-colored and seemingly temporary. Nothing was really filled in, to best describe it, but consisted mostly of frames and cushions. She knew it was permanent, and it looked used, but it gave the whole place a carefree look.

He moved down a hallway and she followed him, still looking around. There were some charcoal sketches, beaches of course, on the walls.

"My friend Danielle makes them," he commented, seeing what she was looking at. He led her into a small room at the end of the hallway with a light grey futon and a glide rocker.

"Not much. If you need anything, I'm across the hall."

"Okay." Neither said anything, just looked around the room. Rory observed her new home for the next few days, while Jess looked at it with a new perspective. Why the hell was he putting Rory here? There wasn't even a mirror. No dresser. Nothing.

"Uh, there's only one bathroom, mine. But it has a mirror, and running water, and all that good stuff."

"Very high-class," she commented, smiling to herself as she watched him squirm and realize his guest room wasn't very hospitable. She'd always enjoyed that, seeing him squirm. It was probably because he had so much self-confidence, even when he was wrong. It humbled him when he was forced to squirm.

"I'll go get your stuff," he said, and exited the room quickly. As soon as he was gone, she tiptoed across the hallway to check out the bathroom. She made it in the door of his room, and stopped. Jess's ROOM. She'd gathered that in the back of her mind when he said his bathroom, but she'd have to walk through Jess's bedroom every day to get to the bathroom. She'd have to walk past his bed every day, and be reminded of that night at Kyle's party…

"Get lost?" came his voice from behind her. So close behind her, actually, she could feel the words warm on her neck. She momentarily froze. It wasn't just the party flashback that was making her wig out. Jess was pretty much the only guy she'd been in an actual relationship with and not slept with. In her mind, that was completely backwards and wrong. He was they guy she'd wanted to be her first. She took one last look at his double bed- white, as was pretty much everything in the beach house, and smartly made-up (Sasha's doing)-before walking into the room.

"Where's the bathroom? I don't want to accidentally walk into a closet." She seemed to have miraculously found her voice. He indicated with a jerk of his head, and she went in to examine it. A shower stall, big bath tub, sink, toilet, all the essentials.

"Up to par?" he asked, coming in behind her. She grinned at him.

"Of course. Can we eat now?" He nodded and she excused herself to go change before they drove to the boardwalk. She slipped into jeans and a red tank-top that read 'Smart girl' across the chest, and brushed her curly brown hair. Wanting to hold her own with any cute California girls they came across, she slid a tube of lip gloss over her lips and refreshed her mused mascara.

"Coming?"

"I'm making myself beautiful," she joked. A red headband and she was set. She walked out of the room and Jess looked immediately away.

"Of course, I was joking about the beautiful part," she hesitantly encouraged. Wait, what was she doing? She'd just gotten there; it was too soon for that.

He didn't deny it, just grabbed his keys from a bowl on the counter. She followed him outside and to his black Chevy convertible, making another 'high class' comment which he rolled his eyes at, and they were off. Rory anticipated just an evening with him, but Jess couldn't take being alone with her just yet. So he was taking her to the place where they'd NEVER be alone. Jimmy's hot dog stand. And Sasha Mariano was working tonight.

**I feel so bad begging for reviews...but you guys know I love 'em! **

**I really can't wait to write the next few chappies, I've got some good ideas...including a you-know-what scene...so stay tuned! **


	11. Sudden Fling with Insanity

**School bites. Here's another little beauty I thought up in Chemistry class. Consequently, I don't know what the fuck a sigma bond is. Not like I would anyway. **

Jess guided Rory out of the car with his hand on the small of her back. He wasn't sure how much he could actually touch her before they had 'the talk', and not meaning the babies-come-from talk. The 'What are we? What do we want? What do we do now?' talk. So he kept the touching to a minimum. But the back seemed safe, as long as he stayed below her bra strap, above her ass, and away from the bare skin on the back of her arms and neck. To her, he had casually placed his hand there. To him, he'd carefully calculated and considered exactly where to lay his hand, after psyching himself up for it. The things that normally came so easy to Jess once again reverted to experiences all in themselves. Rory was, once again, responsible for turning him into a twelve-year-old pubescent boy.

But, as she always had, Rory just saw him acting that way and assumed that his choreographed kisses and precise movements were second nature. They were, with any other girl. But with her, he'd been helpless. He'd had to work extra hard. And she'd never see him doing anything less, because he couldn't stop trying to make her happy.

He gently pushed her towards the direction of Jimmy's hot dog stand, where he could see the line circling the place. He stopped them at a small table away from the crowd, and moved his hand to her shoulder. Bare skin (damn tank top), not good. He seated her quickly, once again guiding with a gentle push, and said he'd be right back. She looked at him questioningly, but didn't say anything. He slipped around back and entered the flimsy establishment.

"Sasha, I need food." Sasha worked various jobs during tourist season, and waited tables in LA during off-season. She was helping Jimmy out for a few weeks while most of his help was off doing whatever they did. Jess didn't really care what they were up to.

"You and fifty other people. Wait a sec, when the hell did you get back into town?"

"A few hours ago."

"So? Tell me all about your sudden fling with insanity."

"I've got someone waiting for food, so I'll just get it myself." He moved to load two hotdogs with everything, knowing what to do as he'd worked there for some time before his writing days. Sasha immediately stepped out the back door and began looking around.

"Who's the relish for?" she called inside.

"Someone."

"Don't even do the one-word answer thing. What, Connecticut didn't welcome you with open arms?"

"The general consensus of Connecticut is that I'm an egotistical, arrogant, self-centered bastard. I found a minority, though." He took a hotdog in each hand, and headed out, telling Sasha to put it on his tab. Of course, being Sasha Mariano, she didn't just accept this information. She followed him to his seat.

"You're skirting around the truth and I want to know what came of this insane trip." Jess ignored her and sat down across from Rory.

"Disregard her," he whispered loudly. Rory nodded questioningly and started to eat. Sasha looked at the scene in front of her. Jess sitting there with a beautiful young girl, obviously not at ease. Anyone who knew him well enough could see that he was anxious and on his edge.

"And you are?" she asked Rory, leaning over and propping her hands up on their table.

"Don't you have to get back to work?" Jess asked sarcastically. Rory put down her hotdog and smiled at the pushy woman.

"I'm Rory. I take it you're Sasha. I've heard a lot about you." Sasha nodded knowingly, and turned to Jess.

"You have two seconds to explain your ass, or you don't even want to know the consequences."

"Way to make a girl feel welcome, Sasha dearest."

"One second."

"Why don't you use that pretty little head of yours and decide for me, because that's what you're going to do anyway?"

"A half of a second," she said, annoyance rippling through her voice. Jess could be a real ass when she was at her most curious.

"She's a friend from Star's Hollow. See, everyone there is determined to keep me away from her, so she's visiting me here for a little while." Rory smiled and looked down at her lap. Sasha raised an eyebrow. This was the girl her step-son had been pining over for God knows how long?

Two thoughts were ricocheting around in her brain. The first being shock that he'd actually followed through, gone to find this girl, and taken her back to California. She wasn't sure what the situation was, but that was terribly quixotic for a guy who spent all day in his hammock, writing in a notebook.

The other thought in her head was simply that Rory wasn't what she'd expected her to be. Jess went for blondes, wearing very little, dripping with hormones and bearing impressive assets. She wasn't saying he was shallow. He just didn't want to be with anyone he could actually grow to like.

Rory was a classic beauty, with graceful cheekbones and russet hair. She'd read his book, but hadn't quite believed his description of Rory. But standing here in front of her, seeing Jess meet Rory's intense blue gaze, clued her into how much of his soul Jess had actually bared in that book.

Realizing she was staring in her observations, Sasha took Rory's chin in her hands.

"Turn, sweetheart." Rory, surprised, let Sasha view her profile.

"She's gorgeous, Jessy," Sasha threw in to make him mad. With a hand wave behind her, she disappeared back to the vendor.

"Sorry about her. She's a little high on life," Jess explained once Sasha was gone. Noticing the grin spreading on Rory's face, he quickly stopped what he knew would come next.

"And you cannot call me Jessy." She pouted, looking adorable. "Still can't." She rolled her eyes and continued eating.

Meanwhile, Sasha had grabbed Jimmy.

"Jess is in love." She stated bluntly, casually. Jimmy checked himself.

"What? What are you talking about now? Is he even back yet?"

"Yes, he was telling the truth. He WAS insane. That girl he went to go see? He brought her back with him."

"She's here now?"

"Yep. Cute little souvenir."

"How do you know all this?"

"Because they're sitting over there. Look for yourself."

Jess rolled his eyes as he saw his father come around the back of the stand and crane his neck looking for Jess and Rory. When he saw him, his eyes widened in amusement, and he shook his head and seemingly chuckled. He went back inside. Jess wondered to himself how long it'd be before they called Lily and got her over here. Why not make it a family event, after all?

"You might wanna eat fast, we're being watched." She nodded, getting his meaning, and gulped down her food. Jess watched, impressed.

"So I see the Gilmore metabolism hasn't slowed down yet?"

"Thank God, no." They got up and began walking again aimlessly, though Rory had earlier claimed her feet were closed to falling off.

"Where to now?" he asked, uncertainly. She shrugged.

"Wherever's fine." A grin slowly lit up his face.

"Want to go swimming?" he asked.

"The water's probably freezing."

"It is."

"There's probably sharks and crabs and eels and all sorts of nasty marine wildlife."

"There is."

"In that case, why not?" He placed his hand on her back once more, and guided her back to the car.

"Where are we going?" she asked once they were driving.

"Home. It's no fun driving when you're wet and covered in sand and cold." She nodded, recognizing that he would, of course, be the expert in this field. He pulled up at the house almost ran into the back yard.

"You're really happy about this, aren't you?" she asked, laughing.

"Hey, I love the ocean. I quote my father when I say, if only man and property were allowed to mate."

"Wow. I didn't realize how serious this thing with the beach was." He shot her one of his patented, adorable Jess-grins, and took her hand before he could think about it. He headed towards the water, kicking his shoes off.

"Uh, no. I'm not going in fully dressed. Or not dressed. Whichever you had in mind, I'm not doing it," she said once she saw that they weren't going to the house to change first.

"East-coast girl," he mocked as she was pulled into the water.

"And proud of it."

"Well then I guess I have no choice but to dunk you."

"Jess, no! Don't!" She screamed as he picked her up before she knew what was happening. They were a past knee-deep now, and he could get her entirely underwater if he wanted to.

"No one can hear you screaming, Rory," he taunted. Her pulse quickened. Jess was right. They were completely alone. Lorelai's teasing came back to her: 'wow, me and Jess all alone on a beach…'

"I'd take a deep breath if I were you." She opened her mouth to respond, instead of heeding his advice. Instantly, she was underwater. Salt burned in her eyes and reminded her of all the tears she'd shed over the man holding her. Her clothes soaked up the water and became multiple times as heavy. She wasn't used to the coldness, the saltiness, or the motionlessness. She coughed as he brought her up. Her mascara mingled with the water and pained her eyes even more, and she gasped for air. She felt him wipe at her eyes with his thumb.

"Well, wasn't that refreshing." She opened her eyes to find him staring expectantly at her.

"You almost drowned me!" she accused.

"It's how I clear my head. I do this almost every night."

"Well, you're weird."

"That just means you need to do it again." He moved as if to dunk her again, and she threw her arms around his neck. Shrugging, he tipped over and they fell together. They came up once more, Rory growing accustomed to the temperature already. He squeezed her hand and then let go. When she looked around, she saw him swimming farther away.

"Get back here!" she called, and tried to follow him. By the time she reached him, however, she was exhausted.

"I admire you," she wheezed out as she collapsed into his arms. Jess was strong. Jess was warm. Jess would make sure no sharks ate her. He held her as he buried his face in her brackish hair, sighing.

"Hey," he said after a minute, "Do you trust me?"

"Trust you how?" she asked, refusing to loosen her grip on him. She had her face buried in his neck now, and she held steadfastly to his soaking t-shirt.

"Trust me not to let anything happen to you while you're here," he asked, moving his head so that he could press their foreheads against each other. He looked dead serious, incredibly sexy, and wet.

"Yea. I trust you," she answered, wondering how much double-meaning she'd laced those words with. Wondering how much she'd wanted to convey at all.

Slowly, giving her the chance to stop him at any moment, he approached her mouth with his. Her heart was racing. This was Jess. She was standing here in the Pacific Ocean, fully clothed, about to kiss Jess. She bet his lips would taste like salt. She wanted him to bite her own lips, make the salt between them sting the open bites, and leave purple bruises that she'd feel whenever she spoke, drank, or parted her lips.

She didn't stop him. He'd assumed she would. He'd assumed she'd want to talk before they did this. Something came over him, and he just leaned in and kissed her. Time seemed to stop nanoseconds before it happened, just as her eyes were fluttering closed. She was okay with this. She wasn't going to pull away. She was going to let him kiss her. Hundreds of miles away from her mother and Lane, soaked to the bone and freezing cold, she was going to let him kiss her. And his brain was screaming at him to stop, but he couldn't control his actions.

Time unfroze as they made contact. She opened her mouth almost immediately to him, and he licked her lips and dove in, lazily exploring this territory that had once been his. She pressed up against him, tilting her head to give him better access, and fought back with her tongue. When they finally broke apart, about to pass out, she barely took a breath before pulling him back to her. He was the one to stop it.

"Talking…"

"Not now."

"Yes now. You're going to regret this later, I know you are." She gave him a sad smile.

"I have a lot of regrets. Dean, not you, being my first is at the top of the list."

"Stop."

"Stop what?" she asked playfully, kissing his neck. He shivered. She was driving him crazy.

"Talking?" he asked, hesitantly.

"Fine. Tomorrow. For sure."

"Thank you."

"Until then…" She slid her hand under his shirt and peeled the wet fabric from his abs. She felt the sinew under her fingers and inhaled throatily.

"What are we doing?" he asked, truly not knowing what she had in mind.

"I don't know," she answered, just as truthfully. Against her wishes, she yawned. It had been a long day on the bus. She'd slept for part of it, but it didn't feel like it. He smiled softly.

"Bed time for Rory." She looked hopefully at him. "Alone."

"When did you become no fun?"

"If you were anyone else, nothing would be holding me back. But you are you. And I don't want to screw anything up again. I did the wrong thing with you, with us. And now you're back in my arms and I'm scared of what you're capable of doing to me now, and I have to go against all my instincts and take you back inside and spend the night alone, because if there's anything here, it's worth waiting eight hours for."

She nodded, reverting to the old Rory again. His reasoning made sense, and it was actually very decent of him. If she hadn't lost all means of reasoning back there when she saw his wet curls and eyelashes dripping with ocean teardrops, she'd have also requested they put this off for the time being.

She began trying to get back to shore, but they'd drifted during their kiss. She hadn't noticed them getting deeper and deeper. All she had been able to think about was his mouth, his tongue, his arms around her. She was tired. She couldn't swim well.

So Jess picked her up honeymoon style, and slowly carried her back to shore. The realization of what had happened, and what she'd pushed for, sank down on her, making her immobile. He mistook her for asleep in his arms, and brought her back to 'her' room immediately. He removed her shoes and stripped her sopping shirt off of her. He couldn't let her go to sleep in wet clothes.

So the pants went to, as his self-control threatened to break him. He'd forced himself, back there, to hold her off. He had been right; both would regret jumping into something before laying down ground rules. But God, he'd wanted her.

He kissed her forehead, and turned the light off. He went back to his own room to attempt to sleep, replaying the kiss over and over in his head. He had no idea what morning would bring, only hopes that it would be something he thought he'd lost.

**Love you all! OH, I forgot to say at the beginning of the chapter, because I was still bitter about my chem grade plummeting into the forties, but now I have good news! I got asked to post this story on a new site featuring Rory romance fics. If you ever get bored, it's called Words Unspoken. I can't figure out how to get the link in here, but I'm sure if you yahoo it, you'll find it. If not, my deepest apologies. **

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing. It makes me feel like, at least I'm failing chemisty for a good cause.**


	12. What if it's not a mistake

**JediPirateElfyDude: Chemistry must die! Thank you for assuring me that I am not the only one who sees no point in diagramming the orbitals that electrons travel in. **

**Jess and No Name: New readers! Yay! Thanks guys! **

**nora17: Looking for literati? Ever been to Bookends? ****http: I love this site. **

**Cadenza at Midnight: Responding to "If we review more, will you fail every other subject too and just write this all day?" Um…Sure why not?**

Rory was the first to wake up. She remembered Jess putting her to bed, stripping her clothes off her. She was tucked in tightly, wearing only her bra and panties. Both white. Such a pure color.

She remembered him taking his time, remembered feeling his inner conflict through his touches. She'd pretended to sleep, for both their sanity. She'd re-lived last night in her dreams, each ending the same way: the way that made the most sense. Not the way that her heart wanted it to.

She got up and grabbed her bathrobe from her bag, deciding to see if he was awake. She slowly opened her door and listened intently. Hearing nothing, she tiptoed to his door, quietly opened it a crack, and peeked into his room. He was sprawled across his bed, his hair clashing with the white pillows. He wore no shirt, and she didn't know if he wore anything else. A white cotton sheet wrapped itself around his waist in a forced manner, indicating that he'd tossed and turned last night.

She closed the door and went back to her room. Noticing the sunshine spilling in the window, she took her cell phone from her bag and went outside to call Lorelai. She sank down into his hammock, watching the waves for a few minutes. The sun glanced off the ocean and made it sparkle. Jess was right; California was so much more beautiful than any murky beach on the east coast.

She snapped out of her trance, realizing Lorelai would assume the worst if she didn't call soon. She'd assume Jess had kidnapped her or raped her or killed her. She stared at the phone, wondering why she wasn't more enthusiastic to talk to her mother. Normally, she'd have to call her and have Lorelai help her sort her feelings out after anything happened. But she felt removed and independent now. She felt like whatever choice she made, it would be the right choice. No one had asked her to make any choices yet. But she already knew she'd make the right one.

Out of kindness, she did finally pull herself together and dial the Dragonfly Inn.

"Dragonfly Inn, how may we accommodate you?" came the French voice on the other end.

"Michel, it's Rory. Can I talk to my mom?"

"During company hours? I am afraid not. But if I remember, I will tell her you called."

"Lorelai will ship you back to Paris if you don't get her now."

"Allow me a minute to fantasize. Ah, baguettes, glace, crepes…"

"Michel, did Lorelai explain the situation?"

"She said nothing to me, but she has been in a snit these past few days."

"Don't you want to know why?"

"Not really. Only if it involves you doing something very naughty and breaking her poor little heart."

"Do you remember Jess?"

"No."

"He's my ex-boyfriend, who moved to California. And that's where I am now. California."

"Lorelai! Your child wishes to speak with you!" Michel called out gleefully, anticipating the look on Lorelai's face. His boss came and grabbed the phone from him as he settled back into his chair, ready for a show.

"Rory? Are you alright?"

"What do you mean am I alright? Of course I'm alright; no one can mess with me if Jess is there."

"Yea, that's why I'm concerned."

"Mom, Jess is being a perfect gentleman. He hasn't sold me into migrant labor or forced me to do dirty things in public as of yet."

"Has he…tried to, well, do anything?" Back in Connecticut, Michel cackled at Lorelai's discomfort.

"Actually, he's holding out remarkably well considering I tried to seduce him last night."

"Whoa there cowboy, WHAT did you try to do?" She stood up and began to walk away from Michel's snickering. He frowned, and followed her. Sookie looked up as both walked into the kitchen, Lorelai looking apprehensive and Michel looking smug.

"What's going on?" she asked Michel.

"Sweet little Rory is in heaps of trouble," he whispered. Sookie had seen Rory leave, so she dropped the bowl of batter she was holding (luckily just avoiding hitting her foot), and followed Michel following Lorelai around the kitchen.

"Okay, start at the beginning, and don't leave anything out. I can take it. Really."

"Well, he dunked me first of all,"

"Is that some new sexual term I should be aware of?" Sookie and Michel looked at each other, eyes wide and interested.

"No, I meant in the ocean. They have one of those here. It's really pretty. I'm staring at it now."

"Okay, I'll overlook the fact that he tried to drown you. Continue."

"And we were really close and I was cold and he kissed me."

"That son of a bitch!"

"And I let him."

"Well, that's understandable. You were surprised."

"And then we needed to breathe so we broke apart and I grabbed him again."

"Very forward of you."

"Thank you. Anyway, he's the one who stopped us. He said we should talk first, and at the time I wasn't thinking, but then he took me inside and put me to bed because I was really tired."

"Wow. That was…nice."

"Wasn't it?"

"So what are you going to do now?"

"Well, he's still asleep, and I have this crazy urge to make him breakfast. But I don't think he'd appreciate if I burned his house down."

"No, men tend to dislike us when we do that. But seriously, what are you going to do about Jess?"

"I don't know."

"Do you…do you still, like, have feelings for him?"

"Apparently yes."

"Okay. Well, you just try to keep your head, call me whenever something happens and you need to talk, and above all, be safe."

"I will, mom," Rory said exasperatedly.

"I'm not even sure what context you might need to be safe in. If it's safe as in wear-sunscreen-on-the-beach safe, then do it. If it's safe as in use-a-condom-for-God's-sake safe, please please please do." Sookie shrieked and knocked over a pile of French toast.

"Talk to you later, mom."

"Yea. You too." They hung up simultaneously and Sookie bounced excitedly.

"So…Rory and Jess…" She made some twitching motions with her hands, and Lorelai looked on cluelessly. Sookie tried again, this time clapping her hands. Lorelai shrugged again. Blushing, Sookie beat the palm of her hand with her other fist, and Lorelai caught on.

"Oh, God I hope not! I was just being general!" Sookie nodded and began trying to clean up the French Toast.

"Is Rory in trouble?" Michel asked sweetly.

"She's in over her head," Lorelai stated as she walked out the back door. No one had to ask where she was going.

"Luke!" she yelled as soon as she reached the diner. Her boyfriend stood up from behind the counter and took one look at her face. Instantly, he was beside her, bringing her coffee.

"What's wrong, Lor?"

"Rory."

"What? What did Jess do?" he asked angrily.

"He didn't do anything. He's treating Rory good, he's taking care of her. Rory is the problem. She's lusting after him, and nothing possibly in the realm of good can happen."

"You're so sure it's lust, and not love?"

"Of course I'm sure! She hasn't seen him in years; she can't still be in love with him! I don't even know if she ever was in love with him to begin with!"

"That still doesn't mean it's not something more."

"That isn't how love works, Luke. It needs to be nurtured, it needs to be fed. I thought I was in love with Chris for the longest time, but I finally realized that I'd fallen out of love with him because he was never around! Nothing ever happened! We were cut off from each other, and we died." Luke sat down across from her and took her hand, looking serious.

"I've been in love with you forever, and I never acted upon it for years. It didn't go away. You were in my life, but not how I wanted you to be. Give Rory and Jess a chance."

"She could be making a mistake."

"She could be. But I think it's one she wants to make pretty damn bad, don't you? And what if it's not a mistake. What if she still loves him, and he still loves her, and they're finally away from everyone who ever doubted them." Lorelai said nothing, just took a sip of her coffee.

Rory slowly entered the house again, wondering if she should wake him up. She didn't see much food in the kitchen, and she was characteristically starving.

She knocked on his door lightly, wondering if she should put on something other than the short, thin bathrobe.

"Come in," he said sleepily from inside, and she cautiously opened the door. He was wearing pants after all, red flannel bottoms. She cracked a smile. Jess wearing flannel.

"You sleep tight?" he asked, rolling over to check the alarm clock.

"Like a baby."

"Then why are you up at eight? Or is this some new, more mature side of Rory Gilmore?"

"Mature? Never!" she gasped in mock-indignation. "I was just wondering if I could use your shower."

"Sure. You hungry?"

"I'm always hungry."

"Well, it's nice to see that nothing's changed. You take your shower and I'll run into town and get us doughnuts."

"You spoil me."

"I have no food in my house. As long as I'm going out, I might as well get something bad for us." She grinned at him as she walked by and entered the bathroom. Closing the door, she quickly stripped off her bathrobe and dried undergarments. By the time Jess had crawled out of bed and started stretching like a cat, she was under the water. He threw on a t-shirt and shoes before leaving the house. He didn't want to be there when she got out, all naked and wet and happy.

He ran into one of Sasha's friends on his way. Her name was Kelly, and she was known for having rapports with younger men. She'd wanted to get her claws on Jess since he'd moved in with Sasha and Jimmy.

"Jess hun, what brings you here in your PJ's?"

"Nourishment."

"That's like eating, right?"

"You're not as dumb as you look, I'll give you that."

"Thanks, babe!" she cooed, not hearing his sarcasm.

"I need to go, Rory will be out of the shower soon," he said, fully knowing what she was up to and willing to say anything to get out of there. He got out of the car and began the short walk to the bakery. Kelly followed.

"Who's Rory?" she asked, trying to sound interested.

"A girl."

"Is she pretty?"

"Very." He grinned despite himself.

"Well, it's been nice talking to you, Jess," she said as he went in. As soon as she lost sight of him through the window, she almost ran to a pay phone.

"Sash? It's Kel. Some girl spent the night at Jess's house," she tattled. If there was anything she loved more than twenty-something surfing champs, it was stirring up trouble.

"Rory, right? I figured he'd keep her there."

"Who is she? How does she know him?"

"She's some girl from his old home. Kel, my step-son isn't going to sleep with you, so you can stop being jealous."

"I'm not jealous, I'm intrigued. Is she special?"

"Oh yea. He's crazy about her."

"Are they serious?"

"All I know is what Jess told me, and he never tells me anything. Go play with the paper boy, I have to work." Kelly hung up and watched as Jess exited the bakery with a full bag, and got back into his car. She sighed and shrugged. Oh well.

**All filler, no killer. But I promise next chapter will be interesting! **


	13. You're going to burn

**tado:gulp: But I like my head on my neck…**

**Everyone: It is official! I cannot find anyone who knows what a sigma bond is! And thanks for the lovely reviews! **

Rory had finished her shower and was walking back to her room wrapped in one of Jess's towels when he entered through the back door. She gathered he didn't use the front door much.

"Sorry," he said as she jumped, hearing him. She looked up at him, her hand on her doorknob. He was fully clothed. He had the advantage.

"I left my clothes in the bathroom, but I'll pick them up," she said, solely for conversation. He nodded and walked out of eyesight. She sighed and walked into her room, looking for something to wear. She hadn't brought many clothes, and her outfit from yesterday was hanging over the chair. Deciding she wanted to go swimming today, she looked for a suit to throw on under her clothes, and thus eliminate the need to dirty another pair of lingerie. Not even thinking about it, she grabbed the black one. She slipped on another pair of jeans and a white polo over the bikini, and skipped out to eat.

"Can I play on the beach today? Build a sandcastle and try to get a tan and read a book and burry my feet, or even better, you, and try to swim and climb the jetty?" She'd been to a beach twice in her life- once when she'd been five and Lorelai had taken her, and once during spring break her freshman year of college. She felt giddy and childlike just seeing the waves outside.

Jess laughed at her enthusiasm.

"Of course. Though stay off the jetties, I've cut my foot open on one before. And don't go too far into the water."

"Can I burry you?"

"When I die, and only then. Chocolate?" he said, offering her a pastry. She pleaded with him and he refused to be buried in sand the entire light-hearted meal, neither broaching the subject of last night, or the fact that every second they were together without talking was dangerous.

After they were done eating, he cleaned up as she excitedly ran outside, already shedding her pants. He forced himself not to look. Instead he headed into the bathroom to take a shower himself (a cold shower would be beneficial right about now), and found her panties, bra, and bathrobe on the floor. He cursed as he shut the door and went to go sit in a corner and stare at his hands. She was killing him.

Rory shrieked and splashed, marveling at how the water could make her feel. Last night, it had made her grown-up and admirable and, well, let's just say it: horny. Today, it made her five years old.

She waded out farther and dug her toes into the sand, before jumping over an incoming wave. Deciding to venture deeper and dive through the waves, she began singing as she ambled.

Jess watched from the window, wanting to join her. If he did, however, there would be a repeat of last night. He was sure of it. Her in that suit? Suicide. But he hated being cooped up inside. So he took his notes and notebook, and sat in his hammock, trying to concentrate. He came up with a lot of bullshit while his mind was elsewhere. All of today's work would end up being scrapped.

Rory started as she turned around. She'd been jumping and diving into waves for almost half an hour. She had no idea how long he'd been sitting there, working. She watched him out of the corner of her eye, and noticed him routinely looking at her and sizing her up. For the first time, she realized she'd chosen her enticing bathing suit.

He'd changed clothes as well. Now he wore simple kakis and a white button-up shirt. It was long sleeved, which was so Jess. She doubted he wore shorts much, even in the California heat.

She'd caught him watching. He ducked his head and began writing gibberish. The words made no sense even within the sentence. Let alone that he was writing about donuts, while the book was about racial barriers.

She exited the water, watching him. He made no move to indicate that he saw this, but she knew he did. She sat down in the sand and began digging in the tide's wake.

Her sandcastle did not work out. It was washed away, and she was having difficulty assembling it anyway. Scooting up the beach several feet, she bunched her hair up under her head, and lay down in the sun. The sand muffled his footsteps as he approached her.

"You're going to burn."

"I put on sun screen."

"You're going to burn. Your skin is too fair to lie out for unplanned amounts of time."

"I'm napping. Go away you loud person." Jess sighed and didn't move. Rory opened her eyes, shielding them with her hand, and saw him unbuttoning his shirt. What was he up to?

He took it off, having forgotten that he was bare-chested underneath. It didn't matter, Rory was wearing far less than him. But he still shivered internally as her gaze raked his soft flesh and dark nipples.

"Wear this," he commanded gently, giving her the shirt. It was a known thing in California, and everywhere where there were beaches, that a plain white long sleeve shirt is light, airy, and SPF one million.

"It's hot; I'm not putting that on," she whined. He sighed in frustration. Walking to the water, he went in far enough that he could bend down and wet the shirt. He wrung it out, and brought it back to her.

"Lorelai is going to come after me if I let you get sunburned, so please just put the shirt on." She shook her head stubbornly. He felt like kicking the sand. But he didn't, because that would have been childish, and he was trying to prove that he'd grown up. He wasn't the same immature and self-centered guy who'd left her behind in Star's Hollow.

"Hey!" she screamed as he forced her into a sitting position. He grabbed on of her arms and sleeved it, as she fought back. She wasn't even sure why she was fighting. She just didn't like being told what to do. She preferred making her own mistakes and then learning from them. At one point in time, she'd been afraid to defy anyone. That hadn't worked out too well for her.

Jess was a lot stronger than her. He got the other sleeve on, and began to button choice buttons. As she squirmed, his hand brushed her swimsuit top, and she blushed. He pushed her back down and straddled her to finish his task. She'd spend the rest of her trip complaining about the pain if he let her get burned.

In a last-ditch effort to get free, she tried to shove his legs away from their tight position on either side of her waist with the hand he wasn't pinning to the ground. Instead, because of his precariously balanced position, he toppled. He lifted his head and looked into her eyes, shining as brightly as the blue skies overhead. Softly, he leaned in and kissed her lips. Unlike last night, this wasn't a passionate exchange of saliva. She parted her lips but he didn't acknowledge it; instead, he planted small kisses on her bottom lip, and sucked at the skin.

As leisurely and impromptu as it had begun, it ended. He buttoned up the second-to-top button on his shirt, and climbed off of her, not breaking their gaze. Then he turned and walked towards the house, her still staring at him. He forgot about his book, and went inside.

Hesitating, she clambered to her feet. They moved of their own account, and followed him. She entered the house and closed the door behind her, already shedding his shirt. She found him lying on his stomach in his room, watching TV from the foot of his bed.

"Can we talk?" she asked softly. She wasn't sure he'd heard her until he wordlessly picked up the remote and turned the talk show he'd been watching off. Or at least trying to watch.

The shirt was unbuttoned and she moved to take it off, but he stopped her.

"Leave it," he said hoarsely. He couldn't talk sensibly if she was just in that little black thing. She nodded, realizing that she didn't have much on under it. He hadn't gotten another shirt yet; taking hers off would have amounted to too much bare skin for a levelheaded talk.

"So. Now we talk," she said, not sure how to begin.

"Last night…" he said tentatively, suggesting a starting point.

"Ah. Last night. Disappointing, in my opinion."

"Disappointing?" he asked, taken aback.

"Ended far too soon," she said softly as he looked down, smiling to himself. For a minute there, he'd gotten worried that he'd done something wrong.

"Just now…" he prodded yet again, still not knowing what had possessed him. Well, he knew what had possessed him- his feelings for Rory. He didn't know what had possessed him to let his guard down.

"Also disappointing."

"Sookie's wedding…"

"What?"

"I want to know if that was as disappointing for you as it was for me."

"We're talking about here and now, Jess."

"Because I was disappointed," he continued, teasing her with his inability to cooperate.

"Okay, I get it! We're very disappointed people!" she said, throwing up her arms. "Back to the topic at hand."

"You came with me," he said with a smirk.

"I did," she answered, her voice dropping in volume and pitch again, but sounding proud of herself.

"Did you come just to talk about old times?"

"I didn't."

"Did you come to build a sandcastle?"

"I didn't. And my castle imploded, anyway."

"Did you come to see if there was anything left to salvage?"

"I might have."

"Did you come to prove something to you, me, or your mom?"

"I might have."

"Did you come for any reason other than the ones which I've listed?"

"I think so." Jess nodded, and became very interested in his CD collection in the corner. Meanwhile, Rory stared at him.

"My turn. Did you miss me?"

"Yes," he responded without having to think.

"Did you ever regret leaving?"

"I don't believe in regrets. But I still did."

"When we saw each other in New York, what was going through your mind?"

"I was thinking that this was my second chance."

"But you didn't do anything."

"I know. I honestly didn't see how it would work."

"And yet, here I am."

"Here you are," he echoed. His eyes traced the collar of the shirt, skimming over her smooth neck skin.

"So this is technically your third chance."

"Some might call it that."

"I missed you too. So much. The entire time I was in Europe I wanted to sit down and write you the longest letter in the world. At my graduation, I kept thinking you'd show up and surprise me. But you called instead. And I lied. I did pine for you. I didn't do it in front of anyone, but I burned your books and pictures while mom was out one day. I cried myself to sleep for a month. I regretted telling you that I thought I'd loved you, because I knew I'd loved you. I didn't get close to anyone else. I tried to, and I screwed up with Dean. I've got a long list of regrets, things I would have done differently. And I cried after I slept with someone else." Rory couldn't seem to stop talking. Everything that had been in her heart since she'd seen him in New York bubbled to the surface and verbalized itself while he sat there quietly. Once she finished, he took a deep, painful breath.

"The entire bus ride here, the very first time I came, I thought of you. Of how I'd seen you on the bus. Of how I'd pretended in my mind that I wasn't going away, and I really would call you later. I thought of all the plans I'd made to keep you in my life even when you went away to Yale. And I thought of what a horrible boyfriend I'd been to you. That was what kept me from turning around and going back to you. I thought you'd be crushed, but once you got over it, you could find someone who could actually be there for you, and who would be good enough for you. It was hard adjusting to here, and I wanted to talk to you so many times, just to hear you say that I'd manage to make everything come together and work out. I didn't talk to you when I called. I couldn't find the words to tell you how sorry I was, how stupid I was. And you said you might have loved me. I knew I'd loved you. I ran from it. I ran from you, and from everything that wasn't working out. And you finally came after me." He watched her wipe a tear from her cheek with the back of her hand.

"Was I supposed to come after you?"

"No. You were supposed to go to Yale and have a great life. I was supposed to be the only one who lost something."

"You weren't. I did everything I was supposed to. You worked hard and got to the same place I did. For once, no one can say you're not good enough for me. We're both pretty equally admired. You have money. You have a job. You have a family unit. Maybe things are finally all in place." He nodded, and bit his lip. He wasn't an emo guy, but he was going to start crying if he didn't watch himself.

"What do you want to do now?"

"What do I want to do? Something completely different from what I probably should do."

"The only reason you think there's something you probably should do is because someone put that idea in your head. Look around, Rory. It's you and me. We're completely away from all influences. We've never been this free. What do you want to do?"

She leaned towards him and kissed him, exactly what he'd known she'd do. He kissed her back, but stopped.

"I feel like there should be more to this talk of ours."

"Like what are we and how are we going to make it work?"

"Assuming you want to be something and make it work."

"More than anything."

"Same here. So, what are we?"

"Whatever you want us to be." They met each other halfway.

"Feel free to interpret that however you want to," Jess whispered into her hair as she ran the tips of her fingers down his naked chest.


	14. Italian Men

**Taking a break from correcting a test (I have the opportunity to bring it up to a 66 if I find all the answers very soon. And, in case anyone ever reads my notes and knows why this would be relevant, it's a chemistry test. Just keeping you up to date on my scholarly life.) to post this little beauty, because I figured you guys had waited long enough. I love this chapter, teehee, it was interesting to write. **

**The two people who emailed me comments, Kelley and Alex, thanks! **

**tado: …LOL, I love my new name! The Cliffhanger Queen! Oh wait, that's bad. **

**elena: I agree; the first part of my story was completely overdone, and I wince every time I read something similar and realize, once again, how cliché I am. I'm trying to go down a different path for the latter part of the story, and I hope you guys like it. **

Jess's breath was strangled and hot as it raked her neck, her fingers getting lower and lower on his abdomen. He was well-built, but not in the way of body-builders and jocks. His muscles flowed together softly under his skin, trying to hide from observing eyes. But you could tell they were there, just waiting to lift something heavy or perform some effortless feat. And the best part was, they looked naturally tone. Jess either had been born the sexiest man on the face of the earth, or he pulled off looking like it very well.

He'd pushed her down, or maybe she'd pulled him over her. Whatever the case, she was lying on his bed in his shirt and a damp bikini, while his capable fingers pulled at the shirt. He arched his back so he could hover over her as he pulled the shirt off her small frame. Sinking back into her, he planted butterfly kisses on her collar bone, deepening each one until he was openly sucking on and biting her skin.

Normally at this point, Rory was more than content just to lay back and let the guy work his magic. But this was Jess. Her Jess. No amount of time, no past (distant or recent) relationships, nothing, could change that.

She entangled her hands with his thick, dark hair. Fleeting thoughts, not having any connection to each other, ran through her head as she forced him to look up at her. The only one she'd remember later, just because it was so amusing, was that she never realized how hot Italian men were- the dark hair and eyes, a complexion many shades of olive, and a perfect bone structure. Even her mother knew that, having been engaged to Max Medina at one point.

She lowered him to her mouth, and they struggled for control. Eventually Jess won, lacing their fingers together and restraining her arms above her head. She smiled confidently at him as he shifted his weight so he was grinding down on her, and kissed her again.

When he let one of her hands slip through his grasp, she immediately brought it up to his hair again, increasing the pressure on the back of his head. She controlled the pace and intensity of the kiss this way while his free hand slid down her side, taking it's sweet time getting there.

He reached her thighs, and raised himself up on an elbow so he could slip his hand in-between their parallel bodies. She moaned into the kiss, both from his tongue and his hand's progress, and he lightly stroked her through the fabric of her bikini.

Hungry for Jess, she whimpered to be manhandled as he slipped a finger around the material. Wet, warm, soft skin greeted him.

"We never did this before," he said, his voice husky.

"Well, you already know I didn't spend the past six years holding out for you, but I wanted you to be my first so badly."

"Why Dean?" he asked sadly, resting his forehead on hers as he inserted another finger into her swimsuit bottom. The two digits teased her, rubbing here and pinching there.

"Because he was there. Because I was frustrated with everything and I wanted to break something. His marriage was right there, ready to be broken. It was too easy."

"And after Dean?"

"Some other guys. None of them mattered."

"Dirty girl," he teased lightly. She couldn't defend herself because he yanked her panties down at that moment, exposing his whole hand to her secret garden.

"Please. When I was still hand-holding with Dean, you were screwing Shane above your uncle's diner. With customers there."

"Shane?" he asked, actually inserting a finger into her body. Snug, but not tight enough to cut off circulation.

"That blonde girl who worked at the beauty supply store. The one you used to make me jealous." She spoke quickly, because she was losing all trains of thought.

"Ah, you mean the distraction. I forgot her name." Another finger in. Rory had wondered if they'd have this conversation, bringing up Shane and Dean. She'd never imagined having it under these circumstances.

"What have you been up to, bad boy?" she asked flirtatiously. He shrugged as best as he could while on top of her, beginning to kiss her ear.

"Trying to get over some chick."

"Oh yea? How's that going for you?"

"Well, it was going great until I went insane." The pressure from his fingers, combined with the knowledge that this was JESS MARIANO driving her crazy, made a sweet, sticky substance seep out of her core, coating his fingers. The blood that had been steadily rushing to his lower regions made him wildly in need of shedding his pants. Sensing this, or rather feeling it, Rory slid her hand down his spine after leaving his tangled hair, and began to tug at his waistline.

Somewhere in the house, "Monkey Gone to Heaven" by the Pixies sounded in the background of their heavy breathing and occasional moaning. Jess looked up from his multiple tasks of kissing her ear, caressing her insides, and taking his pants off.

"What the fuck?" he asked, confused. She sighed, wishing her damn phone would die right that second so the moment wouldn't be ruined. She'd picked that song for her ringtone just because it was one of her favorites, but it also held good memories. The time she'd skipped school and gone to New York to see Jess, he'd taken her to a record store. It had played mainly unsigned and underground bands the entire hour they'd been there, and this song was the only one she'd actually known.

"It's my phone," she said with a sigh. He looked questioningly at her, silently asking if she wanted him to get off so she could answer it.

"I don't want to, but it might be my mom," she said apologetically. He let out a deep breath, and rolled off her. She pulled her panties up and grabbed his shirt from where it had fallen as she hurried to the guest room. As she pressed the 'Talk' button, she heard the shower turn on from the direction of his room.

"Excellent timing," she answered sulkily.

"Uh, did I interrupt something?" came Lorelai's bewildered voice from Connecticut.

"Hey mom, what's your issue?"

"Did I interrupt something?" the phone asked, a little more forcefully this time.

"Kinda."

"Oh my God, Rory! You've been there what, two days?"

"Hey, at least he's not married."

"I knew this trip was a bad idea, you just went to California to sleep with Jess! Why even bother wasting the money on a bus, which by the way I wasn't too thrilled about the idea of you traveling cross-country on, when we've got the Dragonfly Inn right here in Star's Hollow?"

"So you called just to make sure Jess and I were at least an arm's length away from each other?"

"Rory…" Her mother's voice sounded dejected. She knew Rory wasn't always the angel she appeared to be, but she was particularly scared for her daughter this time. Jess had left some serious emotional damage in his wake last time. She'd rather Rory be sleeping with some random, faceless guy than Jess.

"I know you're disappointed in me. And it hurts, a little. But this feels so right, it's like we never really left off. Like we've been waiting for the perfect time to find each other." Rory sounded so excited about this notion that Lorelai didn't have the heart to scold her.

"Sweetheart, be safe. You know exactly what I mean this time, no hypothetical-ness. And be smart. I don't trust him. And I know that doesn't really matter to you as much as I wish it did, but I just want you to keep it in the back of your mind that he's got some baggage."

"I know he has baggage. So do I. We talked about it; we're still in the process of talking about it. Please don't make me resent you for not supporting my decision."

"Well, I'll try not to. Listen, before you get back to whatever you and Jess were doing, like I don't already know, I was calling originally to ask what you wanted me to say to my parents tonight."

"Oh yea, it's Friday."

"Do they not have those in California?"

"No, they do. At least I think so. I haven't seen a calendar yet, but I somehow don't think it's legal anywhere in the US to go directly from Thursday to Saturday."

"So, now that we know what day of the week it is, I need ideas."

"Just tell them the truth. They always find out anyway, and then everyone is mad at each other because we lied to them."

"So I waltz in to Casa Gilmore, clear my throat, and announce 'Mom, Dad, Rory is not going to be joining us tonight because she's in bed with this guy who used to treat her really badly. Oh, and did I mention they're in California? Okay, let's eat.'"

"No, just tell them that I'm in California for personal reasons. When they ask what those reasons are, say I'm, well, I don't know if what I'm doing exactly has a name for it."

"It has a name alright. Fucking Jess." Rory could hear the noise in the background, presumably the diner, grow quiet. Lorelai's crude language and sudden increase in volume had shocked everyone within hearing distance.

"For your information, miss I-know-everything, he is in the shower while I'm talking to my mother. Real hot stuff. We haven't had sex yet, and thanks to your impeccable timing, who knows if we'll get our perfect moment back?"

"I'm calling every five minutes."

"I'm turning my phone off."

"I'm telling my parents that you're away on business."

"Please don't. Just tell them whatever, I don't care how in-depth you go."

"Maybe I'll shrug my shoulders and tell them to call you. And then I won't have to call every five minutes."

"Hanging up now,"

"Wait! One more thing. You know you can tell me anything, right?" Rory raised her eyebrows.

"You want details?"

"No no no, I want updates on how things are going. And maybe someday when we're old and cranky and sitting at bar drinking cheep rum, I'll get the details."

"Will do. Now can I hang up?"

"You don't need my permission; you're grown," Lorelai responded nostalgically.

"Love you," Rory said as she hung up, not giving her mother a chance to detain her further. Lorelai was trying to be cool; 'trying' being the key word. As much as she loved her mother, she could never understand what Rory was going through. Even when she'd been in love with Christopher, they were connected by Rory. Jess had been completely out of her life for more than six years. She honestly never thought she'd see him again. It was fate. Rory trusted that there was someone for everyone, and maybe Jess was her someone. Maybe they were meant to be together.

As Star's Hollow buzzed about Lorelai's phone call, Rory took Jess's shirt off again and walked back into Jess's room. She followed the sound of the running water into the bathroom where she knocked lightly on the foggy door. He poked his head out, soaking wet.

"May I help you?" he asked, in an inquiring tone of voice.

"My mom just blurted out to all of Star's Hollow what we were doing."

"It'd be a shame not to finish it now, don't you think?"

"My thoughts exactly. May I join you?" A sly grin lit up his dripping features, and he held the door open as she slithered out of her suit, watching every movement closely.

She ducked under his arm to enter the steamy shower, and looked down immediately. He'd already taken care of himself, she noticed with a pout. He pulled her close and kissed her as the water penetrated her already damp hair, re-soaking it.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, holding on for dear life. His hands rested on her ass, pulling her bottom half in closer. They were completely touching in every place possible, each feeling a familiar stirring begin within themselves again.

He bent his head and whispered in her ear.

"I'm sorry."

So much was contained in that statement. Everything from he was sorry Lorelai interrupted them, to he was sorry he was putting through having to sort out her feelings for him yet again, to he was sorry that he'd left her. She didn't know if he was talking about any one in particular, but it took only one look into the depths of his dark brown eyes to know that he was truly sorry- for all of it.

He maneuvered so that she was pressed up against the wall, with his back to the shower door. Moving up against her, he recreated the moaning sounds escaping from her mouth, even adding some of his own as she kissed him again. He glided a finger back into her, recreating their earlier position, only vertical. He added another at her kiss of approval, and withdrew only when they both were ready for the real thing.

"Condom," she commanded quietly, remember her mother's various pleas to be safe. He pulled their bodies apart and almost jogged back into his room to grab something from his bedside table, before coming back. He tore the package and grabbed the object, rolling it on before climbing back in the shower. He noticed his name drawn lovingly on the foggy glass, but did not remark on it. Instead, he kissed her tenderly and lined them up, before doing what he'd never been able to in his past life. He made love to Rory Gilmore, standing up in the shower of his California home.


	15. Don't push Rory away

**Utopist: Nope, not done yet. I've got some more ideas… And I'm very sure you have your share of unsexy men on your side of the ocean. Don't we all? Thank God we have Milo Ventimiglia somewhere in the US to balance them all out.**

**AnneTrinityRGJM: Why do people always threaten to kill me:Tells the FBI about you all:**

**smile1: Your praise always means so much to me. I love the reviews where people say 'you're so great, your story kicks ass', but you always tell me exactly what was wrong or right and not only does it help me out, it leaves me glowing. Glad you thought the last chapter was great. **

**S0m3thing-Pr3tty- Happy to make your day better. **

**OnLoveInSadness and Bex: Thank you for suggesting to up the rating…I really don't want to get in trouble. gulp I have followed through with your excellent advice, as you may have noticed. Thanks again. **

**Everyone: Thanks for the happy feeling I get whenever there's a new review alert in my mailbox. **

**Disclaimer: I was reading the TOS, looking for information about ratings and such, and I saw a lot of stern warnings saying something along the lines of "Disclaim or die" so, uh…I don't own? The characters, that is. And some of the plot. The occasional lyrics. But everything else is all me. **

Rory sighed as she ran her fingers through Jess's tangled hair, trying to comb it gently. Hours after the hot water had run out, Jess had finally turned the shower off, wrapped her preciously in a towel, and they'd walked hand in hand out to the beach. Rory loved being so close to the waves and the sand. It wasn't surprising really, because her and Jess were alike in so many ways. They were like clock cogs, symbolically. They were into the same books and music, and had a lot of the same opinions. But there was enough difference to allow them to slide into each other's grooves, and just click.

They were lying in his hammock, wearing only towels around them. That was another thing Rory liked about this place – they were completely alone, and could act like it. There could have been a mass genocide that killed everyone else in the state, the country, or the world, and they wouldn't have known. They were the only two people alive as far as Rory was concerned.

His dark head was cradled in her lap like a child, and his arms were tightly clinging to her waist. She gave up on de-tangling his hair by hand and rubbed his back soothingly.

He mimicked her sigh of contentment, and she felt his hot breath on her leg. Watching the sun sink below the watery horizon with Jess half-asleep in her lap, Rory couldn't picture anywhere else in the world she'd rather be. She'd been all over the world for her work, and she'd seen some impressive cities. And of course, Star's Hollow was her beloved home. But nowhere else had she ever felt so happy.

A slight salty breeze sent a chill through her as it brushed her damp hair, and she mediated on it as she was warmed once more by Jess's arms around her waist. Anyone could tell her she was throwing caution to the wind here. She had been ever since she agreed to come with him. There were risks that they wouldn't work, and they'd be hurt, and one of the most dangerous risks of all- the risk that Rory would fall head over heels for him again.

'Too late' she thought with a sad smile, as Jess stirred, looked up at her with a smile hanging from his lips, and returned to his previous position. Lorelai, her grandparents, and all of Star's Hollow would be scared by the pace of their relationship. Rory knew, in the back of her mind, that it SHOULD feel like it was progressing too quickly.

But she didn't. She knew Jess already. He'd changed a little, but the more time she spent with him, she realized that he was the exact same diner boy who'd stolen her heart. And she'd carried feelings for him with her for a long time. He'd always been a memory, a both happy and sad chapter in her life. Now he was with her, in the flesh. He wouldn't run again, she knew this. She wouldn't run, she knew this also.

Things weren't moving too fast; they'd waited eight years for circumstances to align like this.

"Ror?" he whispered, and for a second she thought it was the wind. When she realized it was him, she touched his cheek in acknowledgement.

"I still love you. So much." She could die now, because she wasn't going to get any more content.

"I love you too," she whispered into the wind. She knew he heard her by the kiss on the inside of her leg. He sat up for the first time since they'd come outside to stare at the sea, and wrapped his arms around her upper body.

"You cold?" was the question, but he didn't wait for her to answer before pulling her closer and rubbing her arms. She smiled into his chest at his attentiveness, and hugged him back.

"I have decided to forgive you for leaving without telling me."

"Hey, better late than never."

"Yes. I wholeheartedly agree, better late than never." She raised her eyes so she could look at him, and he kissed her forehead.

"What do you think love really is?" she asked a few minutes later, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I think…it's a force, in many different forms, that holds people together. There's your standard parent-child love, boyfriend-girlfriend love, best friend love, pet-owner love, partners-for-life love, and I'm sure there's a few I left out."

"So he admits he doesn't know everything."

"Hey, I know them, I just don't wanna bore you with them." He smirked at her as she rolled her eyes.

"Which one are we?"

"Pet-owner love."

"Right. Why didn't I guess?"

"I don't know exactly what we are. I think it varies with each different couple. Who even knows if we're still going to feel like this when we wake up tomorrow?" Rory raised her eyebrows at him.

"Okay, we'll still feel like this tomorrow. I don't think I'll ever stop loving you. But my point is, with some people you can just tell that they're going to be together forever."

"Mom and Luke," Rory interjected, making tiny circles on his chest with her finger.

"Right. With some people, it's more complicated. People who haven't talked since high school and who live on opposite ends of the country have one of those very complicated relationships, that no one else understands."

"Yea, what are we going to do about that?"

"I don't know. We'll figure something out, because I'm never letting you go." To prove his point, he held Rory tightly as she tried to wiggle free from his arms. She shrieked and tipped the hammock over on purpose, landing underneath him.

"You just killed me," she said accusingly as he looked around, wondering how he'd gotten to be on the ground.

"Well you tipped us over, so I think you deserved it. Thank you for breaking my fall, by the way."

"Oh, any time."

"Really?"

"Not if you enjoy being intact." He rolled them over so she was lying on top of him, and she picked up a handful of sand. It dribbled out of her fingers and onto Jess's neck as he lay there, staring into her eyes. Once the sand was gone, she dipped her head and brushed her lips with Jess's. He locked his arms around her, keeping her balanced, as she cupped her hands around his handsome Italian face.

"Mama Mia," she whispered to no one in particular, and he didn't comment on it. Sometimes, it was best just not to ask what was going on in that cute little Gilmore-head.

Lorelai drummed her fingers on the counter, not enjoying the silence of the diner. She was trying to get some work done in Rory's absence, and Luke let her use her computer at the diner. The only customers there, however, had been strictly ordered by Luke not to talk to her. She wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone, and it had showed when she nearly bit Dean's head off.

He'd heard her mention Jess and the F-word, and had become furiously possessive- with his wife standing right there. Lindsay didn't say anything. Lorelai could never get over how Lindsay had forgiven Dean for cheating on him. She even got along with Rory now. Truth was, Lindsay was too passive a person to show her contempt for someone. She'd forgiven Dean because she didn't know what else to do, and she pretended to have forgiven Rory because she didn't foresee her ever sleeping with Dean again.

Rarely did Dean obsess over Rory like this, but her being with Jess brought out a new, angrier side of him. Painfully, Lindsay and Lorelai recalled that Dean had been Rory's first. He'd won- for the time being. But not anymore, apparently. Now that she was with Jess, it became clear that Dean had won temporarily simply because he was there when Jess was not.

The old rivalry between the two was still alive in Dean, even though Jess wasn't exactly around to return it. And he'd reverted to his seventeen-year-old self who was furiously obsessed with keeping Rory and Jess apart.

He'd lost, in his mind. Rory was in California, Rory was sleeping with Jess. She'd walked away from Dean and all her friends at the bus stop, with Jess. In his mind, Jess had won. And he hated losing after all those years.

Lorelai had snapped when he asked her why she was letting her daughter ruin her own life. Rory was going to turn into Lorelai. Rory was going to end up pregnant, alone (because Jess wouldn't stick around, no way), and scared. That was when Lorelai had thrown a full napkin-dispenser at him, and shouted at Luke to come kill him.

Luke hadn't killed him; he'd shoved Dean out of the diner with instructions never to come back. Ever. Lindsay had followed him out, knowing what was going on in her husband's head. She'd been planning on telling him she was pregnant today. That would have to wait until he calmed down. Rory had ruined something important to her, once again. As much as Lindsay knew Dean loved her, Rory would never fade out of their relationship. And she'd known that when she married him –he'd proposed not long after the fight. She said yes, knowing that he'd still care about Rory years after the wedding. And she'd been right. For someone who'd married a man still hung-up on his ex, she was a smart girl.

Lorelai tried to put angry Dean, and the look on Lindsay's face, out of her mind. It was not doing wonders for her sanity. She was missing Friday night dinner without calling, because she hadn't been able to think of a good excuse. Luke now shuffled over to the counter, refilling her coffee mug for the tenth time. She'd been sitting and thinking and drinking coffee all afternoon.

"You told her to be safe, and she is Rory," he ventured, speaking about the call for the first time that afternoon.

"I know. I'm not worried about that."

"Then…why am I giving you pity-coffee?"

"Because you misread what my head is experiencing."

"And in the process, I gave you enough caffeine to power a small country. Great. So, what are you worried about?"

"I'm worried that Rory hates me now. I mean, she said 'love you' before she hung up, but what if it was a get-off-my-back sortof thing. What if she secretly hates me because she thinks I don't approve of this whole Jess thing? What if she never speaks to me again?" Luke sighed, and refilled Lorelai's coffee cup after she gulped the whole thing down and replaced it on the counter.

"She doesn't hate you. She's bound to know that this is hard for you, and she'll understand. Trust me, the two of you will speak again, many times, often about subjects that poke fun at other peoples belongings, such as my hat."

"Heh, it's a funny hat," Lorelai said, beginning to smile again. Luke rolled his eyes as she hopped off her stool and headed for the stairs.

"Where are you going? Did I say you could go up there?" Luke asked suspiciously. When Lorelai was unsupervised in his apartment, she tended to move the furniture. Something about feng shui.

"Coffee is a liquid, I have to go potty," she pouted, looking and sounding two-years-old. Luke sighed and waved her upstairs, fully knowing that the next time he went up there the couch might be blocking the door.

While she was gone, Lane entered the diner and spotted Lorelai's monkey purse.

"Luke, is Lorelai still here?"

"It's my lucky day, so yes."

"Is she okay?"

"She's fine, she's just afraid that Rory will think she isn't supporting their relationship."

"IS she supporting their relationship?"

"She doesn't have a big, puffy hand to wave around, but she's not trying to interfere. She just wants what's best for Rory."

"I heard that you suspended Dean from your diner for life."

"Well, he was being a jackass to her. I can see why Jess never liked that kid." Lorelai poked her head out from the doorframe, asking Luke if he could help her move the bed.

"Not in a million years. But, look, Lane is here to see you." He shot Lane a look saying 'You'd better take her', before going to refill another customer's coffee.

"Hey Lorelai, I just heard about earlier."

"It took this many hours for you to find out? Patty must have got distracted by something tall, dark, and handsome."

"Well, we've been rehearsing all day, and no one thought of coming to inform us. I feel so out of the loop. I'm Rory's best friend, other than you, I should be in the loop!"

"I agree! You should be in the loop. You of all people are not supposed to be loop-less."

"So, are you doing okay?"

"If my daughter doesn't totally despise me for doing exactly what my mother did…ah, crap. My mother. I was supposed to go to dinner tonight, and I totally forgot to call to tell her I wasn't coming!" She pulled out her cell phone as Luke glared in her direction.

"Hi mom, it's Lorelai. I am so sorry, I've been out all day, and things are kind of hectic, you know, with this big…thing at the Dragonfly, and I totally forgot about tonight, but I'll make it up to you! No, Rory's not here with me, she's in California. Didn't I tell you, she had to go there this week." As she listened to her mother reply that there was never any mention of Rory going to California, she remembered what her daughter had said.

"Actually mom, she's not there for work, she's there for personal reasons."

"Oh really? And what might those be?"

"She's visiting an old friend."

"Which friend? Do I know her?"

"Actually it's a him. She's visiting Jess. Do you remember Jess?" Of course Emily remembered Jess, they both knew it.

"The boy who crashed her car?"

"That was a long long time ago, mother. But yes, the boy who crashed her car. And before you get started, let me help you. The boy who broke her wrist, didn't take her to the prom, failed high school, left without telling her, and charmed you with his social skills."

"What on earth is Rory visiting him for? I haven't heard either of you two talk about him in ages."

"Well, it's the weirdest thing. They ran into one another, and he invited her to come stay with him."

"In California?"

"In California, that's right."

"Lorelai, how could you just let her go running all over the country after some boy who did all that to her?"

"Rory may still live with me, mom, but she's an adult. Old enough to drive, vote, drink, and go straight to a grown-up correction facility. I'm serious, no more juvie for her."

"Well then how could you not at least try to stop her? You two are so close, it wouldn't be hard."

"She wanted to go, mom. Apparently Jess did a little growing up too since we last saw him, and I trust him to make sure Rory stays away from trouble for a few days."

"Give me this boy's phone number, I want to talk to them both."

"Mom, don't push Rory away."

"I'm trying to help her here, not push her away."

"Yes, but if you call her and try to convince her that she's making a mistake, she won't like it mom. I already tried to talk to her about this, she wanted to go."

"And you're okay with this?"

"Rory's a big girl. She can make her own decisions, and I'm proud of her for it."

"Are you okay with this or not?"

"I'm not thrilled, mom, but I totally respect her for doing this. And I am not going to let you push her away. It'll hurt her, but she'll go willingly. She's my daughter, after all." Emily was silent for a minute, before quickly picking up the conversation.

"Are they just friends, or are they dating?"

"Dating, I guess."

"You guess?"

"They're more than friends, but I'm not sure if they've come up with an official title for themselves yet, mom."

"Is Rory going to come back?"

"Of course." She'd felt sure when the words formed in her head, but as she said them, grew uncertain. Rory would come back, she was almost sure. Even if she found love with Jess, and fell for the California beach, she would come back to her mother. For some reason, a tiny flicker of doubt stuck her insides before disappearing all together. Lorelai hung up, and walked over to Luke.

"Coffee?"


	16. Don't hurt him

**Those of you who reviewed, thanks bunches!**

**This chapter contains large amounts of Sasha (yea!), but she'll seem a little out of character. I plan on righting this in the next chapter, so bear with me until then. Unless of course you get where she's coming from. In which case, disregard everything on bold in this page, she's perfectly in character. **

"Watch out for the dogs," was Jess's only comment as he opened the gate to Jimmy and Sasha's house, and went in without a second thought. Sasha had insisted on having Rory over for a nice little family dinner, and so Jimmy could meet her. When she'd pointed out that they didn't know the girl who'd traveled cross-country for him, he brought up that her and Lily had already met her. So she fired back that Jimmy was dying to meet Rory, and Jess had lost.

Rory had left Star's Hollow exactly ten days ago. A portion of those days had been spent on a bus, and others had been spent lounging around Jess's house with Jess himself. Every day they wrote, him in the hammock, and her inside on the widow seat. That way they could look at each other, but keep their hands to their selves. This had proved to be a problem. Especially when they were trying to think deeply and worldly.

At night, they'd eat on the boardwalk. They'd come home and Jess would always convince her to jump in the waves with him. Then he'd pick her up and take her to his room, where they'd be up all night exploring each other.

Rory had left Star's Hollow exactly ten days ago. But she had already settled into a routine she could live with for the rest of her life.

Lorelai called every afternoon, which was later morning in California, which was about the time Jess and Rory woke up and began to forage for breakfast. She kept Rory up-to-date as to the town events. She left out the disappointment that seemed to be settling over the town now that Rory had been gone almost two weeks. They felt let down. They'd practically helped Lorelai raise Rory, and then she left them for the exact same guy who'd left town previously.

Back to Sasha's. The dogs barked at the stranger, and Rory grabbed Jess's arm.

"Legolas, Mudball, go lick something disgusting!" Rory looked at him in amusement.

"You know them by name?"

"Yes. Please do not comment."

"You can look at a pack of barking, sniffing, jumping dogs, and identify each one by name?"

"I come over here about once a week."

"Which one is this?" she asked as one made quite a show of sniffing her ass. Jess batted her away.

"Caligula." He walked in the door and held it open for her as she sprinted past the dogs and inside.

"Rory!" Lily exclaimed as she bounced up from the couch where she'd been reading.

"Do not scare the guest, Lily. Whatcha reading?"

"To Kill a Mockingbird. It's for English, but it's not bad." Jimmy ambled in the room at that moment, pant-less.

"Jesus, Dad!" Jess exclaimed in exasperation, as Rory reddened and focused on the pictures decorating the walls.

"Jess, you here? Jimmy, why the hell are you walking around in your boxers when we have company?"

"I'm looking for my pants, Sash."

"Try the closet. The hamper. The laundry room. Not the living room, and not when Jess's girlfriend is here." Jess caught Rory's eye and she smiled at him. Jess's girlfriend. It felt good to be called that again. They'd discussed what they'd tell Sasha and Jimmy about their relationship, and it had been decided that they were officially a couple. Both knew the current situation, California, couldn't last forever. But it was nice to pretend like they could carry on like this forever. And someday soon, they'd decide what they were in the long run.

"Rory, nice to see you again," Sasha pacified while Jimmy left the room.

"You too," she responded, smiling nervously. She'd never had to go through this, meeting the parents, with Jess. She'd known Luke far longer than him when he moved in with his Uncle, and she met Liz only after Jess moved away. Sasha smiled back, trying to make her feel more welcome. She was new at this too. Jess's personal life never really amounted to anything important enough to introduce to him family.

"Well, enough standing there, everyone in the kitchen before the pasta salad gets cold. Jimmy! Pants, kitchen, now!" Everyone followed Sasha's orders, and sat down at the table set with colorful plastic plates and glasses with smiling suns on them. Rory grinned at the place settings. Lorelai would love it.

Sasha gave Rory a few more minutes to feel comfortable. Even Jess's hand on her knee under the table couldn't make the butterflies in her stomach go away, but after a few minutes of Lily and Jess bantering about To Kill a Mockingbird and Sasha wrist-slapping Jimmy over the pants issue, she felt somewhat at ease.

"So, Rory," Sasha began, and stopped to take a drink. Rory swallowed her food and awaited the woman's stream of endless questions about her and Jess. Jess had forewarned her that Sasha's greatest thrill in life was poking her nose into Jess's business.

"Why the sudden urge to visit our neck of the woods?"

"Jess and I thought I should come out for a few weeks because no one in Star's Hollow really, well, likes him. Or thinks he should be allowed to roam the streets."

"I know the feeling. But don't your friends wonder why you've been away?"

"They all know why I'm here."

"Which is why?"

"To catch up with Jess. I haven't seen him since I was in high school, not counting the time we ran into each other in New York."

"Interesting." Sasha and Jimmy exchanged an amused look, and continued eating. Lily, however, didn't let it remain silent for long.

"How did you meet Jessy?" Jess scowled at her, hating the nickname Sasha and Lily used teasingly for him sometimes.

"Uh, he moved to Star's Hollow when I was 16. Do you not read Jess's books because you're his step-sister?"

"I read them, I just thought he was making all that small town stuff up."

"I told you it was a true story."

"Yea, well you also told me Santa was real." Jess stopped eating and threw his hands up.

"I didn't know Jimmy had already spilled the beans!" Rory smiled as the two bickered for a little while, loving the big-brother side of Jess.

"Alright you two, knock it off!" Sasha yelled as Lily launched a spoonful of pasta salad at Jess. Rory blinked, not having seen that one coming. Jimmy sighed and leaned over the table to whisper to her.

"It's not dinner at the Marino house until someone's food is flying through the air."

"Noted," Rory said, nodding seriously. Jess wiped his face off, pondering how he could retaliate. One look from his step-mother, however, made him resume eating immediately. Rory also loved the son side of Jess.

After dinner, Sasha volunteered Lily and Jess to clean up while she invited Rory into the living room to dig out embarrassing photos of Jess. She rummaged through boxes of pictures that had never made it into photo albums, occasionally finding one she deemed humiliating enough.

"This is him his first week in California. You'll notice the black pants, black shirt, and black leather jacket. You will also notice the look on his face, as it finally dawns on him that he's dressed like a bloody idiot." Jess rolled his eyes from the sink where he was washing dishes, choosing not to remember how stupid it had been to defiantly wear those clothes in the California summer.

"I think I have some more in my closet, Rory follow me." Helplessly, Rory followed Sasha out of Jess's range of hearing. What neither of them knew was Sasha and Jimmy had talked about this ahead of time.

While his wife and Rory were in their bedroom, Jimmy nervously cleared his throat and rubbed his hands together, standing next to Jess in the kitchen.

"So…you and Rory…"

"What did Sasha tell you to ask me, Dad?"

"Nothing. At all. I'm just curious how things are going with Rory. Am I not allowed to wonder about my son?"

"She put you up to this."

"No she didn't. Fine, yes she did. But I'm still curious. From what I've heard about her, she's not one to spontaneously travel across the country to be with her ex-boyfriend."

"Is there a question here?"

"Why is she here? How long is she here for? What does her mother think about this? What are you two, exactly? Is she staying permanently? Are you going back to Connecticut? How are you going to do the long distance thing?"

"…and I get seven questions. I should think before I open my mouth and ask for clarification."

"Answer them. I'm not good at the whole bonding thing, you know that, so just answer me honestly and simply." Lily hopped up on the counter to watch Jess's face as he continued to rinse the plates, a shadow of a smile on his face.

"She's here because things would never work out in Star's Hollow. We haven't talked about when she's going back, or how we're going to make this work, but we'll find a way. I'm not moving, though. Don't worry about that, we'll have plenty of 'bonding time'."

Sasha smiled widely at Rory as she dug through the shoebox, looking for Jess pictures.

"So, you and my step-son. Never thought he'd be with someone like you."

"Excuse me?" Rory asked, surprised.

"I mean that in a good way. I don't think the majority of his girlfriends are literate." Rory grimaced. So he still hooked up with girls like Shane.

"I'm glad he's with a smart girl, and you seem nice. All pluses in my book. But listen to me Rory." She put the box down and looked Rory squarely in the eye.

"Jess may act all smartass, hardcore, bad boy. But he's a sweetheart underneath. He cares, even though he fights tooth and nail to pretend he doesn't. Now, I've never seen him get his heart broken, because he's never given it to anyone. And he walks in here tonight with you, shooting you secret looks and resting his hand on your leg, very smooth of him by the way tell him that, during dinner. I have not seen this side of Jess before. I like it, and I like you for bringing it out in him. But you make him show me what he looks like with a broken heart, and I will hunt you down. Jess may have a biological mother, but he's been a son to me ever since he moved here, and I am not gonna let you walk out of here with him without telling you this. Don't hurt him." Sasha smiled thinly as she got up, putting the box away. It was all pictures of her and Jimmy. Rory followed her back to the living room, uneasy.

On the walk home, she told Jess about their conversation. He raised his eyebrows at Sasha's maternal threat, and only pulled Rory closer to him in response.

"I agree. Don't hurt me," he said quietly and seriously as she slipped her arm around his waist.

"Wouldn't dream of it," she replied, kissing his cheek.

When they got home, Jess stepped outside to try and write while Rory called Lorelai to tell her about the night's events.

"'Don't hurt him'? Jeez, from what you told me about Sasha, I'd have expected her to ask if the two of you were sleeping together. And when you answered affirmatively, she'd have asked you all about it."

"I know, but she was totally serious. It's kind of sweet, even though I'm terrified of her. I don't want her to hunt me down!"

"Well, it's not like I didn't do the same with Jess. Hey, put him on the phone so I can terrorize him, will ya?"

"No can do, he's working."

"You mean the two of you are actually getting work done? Because from what I heard, it was all about the, you know..."

"Dirty minded," Rory accused, rolling her eyes.

"Well I don't deny it. Any return date yet?"

"None so far, but I promise I will tell you in advance."

"I'm bored. It's no fun when you're not here."

"You need to find an outside source of entertainment. I will not always be around to play with you, Lorelai," she scolded her mother.

"Well, Luke's burning something and Sookie's working herself to death and I have no more friends."

"Go watch a movie."

"But there's no one to help me mock it!"

"Go read a book."

"When did we switch bodies again?"

"Go take a walk."

"I've seen everything there is to see. You're tedious."

"Well then I'm out of ideas. It looks like you'll have to find something to do all by yourself."

"No, wait, I'm desperate! Keep thinking!"

"Visit Grandma."

"As soon as you come back, I'm placing you under the care of professionals. What on earth would make you suggest that?"

"You're bored, go hang out with Grandma."

"What is in the water in California? Sweetie, you're not supposed to drink directly from the ocean."

"I was serious, but if you're going to mock me, I can go amuse myself elsewhere."

"Sure you can, because your boyfriend has time for you!" She said the last part loudly enough that Luke would hear her in the kitchen.

"I'll talk to you later, now go do something with yourself."

"Love you," Lorelai pouted as Rory hung up.

"How're Rory and Jess?" Patty asked, sitting beside Lorelai.

"They're just peachy. She met his dad and his step-mom, who apparently threatened to 'hunt her down' if she broke Jess's heart."

"Are we talking about the same Jess? The one who broke Rory's heart?" Patty asked sarcastically. Lorelai shrugged.

"He's doing better, I guess."


	17. He'll never love you

**JediPirateElfyDude: Uh, well they're supposed to be at the diner although they could be at Lorelai's, and Luke is having a mini-cooking fiasco while Lorelai is complaining to Rory about how bored she is because Luke is working. Patty then sits down to chat with her. Hope I cleared that up for you. **

**Everyone: Thankie thankie for the reviews. I'm working on some of the upcoming chapters, and I think I finally got it all planned out: the story will be about 25 chapters, give or take, and I've got some ideas in mind on how to end it. Not to worry though, it's far from over. I still appreciate feedback! **

**And, in advance, I don't think killing Kat (you'll meet her in this chapter) off will do any good. Believe me though, I thought about it. **

A few weeks later, Rory awoke to the sound of the house line ringing.

"You're closer," she mumbled to Jess as he sighed and sat up, yawning. He climbed out of bed and picked the phone up off the dresser, "huh"-ing as he answered. A few minutes and a few 'huh's later, her hung up and turned to the bed where Rory was curled up under the covers.

"We're going to the beach today." She pulled the covers down so her eyes were visible as he got back into bed, reaching out for her under the sheets. She let herself be pulled against him, and snuggled into his body for a few minutes before remembering the phone call.

"We go to the beach everyday."

"Today we're going to a public beach, with some friends of mine. Of course, you don't have to; we could get out of it. But my buddies told me where and when we're all meeting up, and I want them to meet you." She sighed and nodded, wondering what Jess's friends would be like.

A few hours later, they were walking across a loud and crowded beach, Rory growing more and more grateful for Jess's private strip.

"Mariano!" a girl shouted, and Jess grinned and headed in her direction. Rory was wearing her black suit, hoping to impress the locals as someone worthy of dating Jess, and a sundress she'd purchased. She'd been there for almost a month, and her duffel bag of clothes hadn't cut it. Jess simply had swim trunks on under low rising jeans, which hung low on his hips. Rory wasn't the only one having a hard time keeping her eyes off him as he walked.

They stopped in front of a large group of kids in their mid-twenties, all gathered around a girl they were burying in the sand. She screeched playfully as one of the guys drizzled sand down her skimpy, flowery top.

Jess did the handshake/high five thing all males do while Rory shifted uncomfortably in the sun. All the girls here were gorgeous in their own cheap-looking way. Shane would have fit right in, but Rory didn't.

"Who's the doll?" asked a voice, and Rory grimaced. It was apparently obvious to more than just her that she didn't fit in.

"This is my girlfriend, Rory. Don't give her a hard time, all right?" The majority mumbled something positive in response, and he sat down next to a guy displaying a tattoo of a snake on his bicep. They began to converse, and Rory awkwardly sat down next to Jess, wondering if she'd ever feel at home with anyone in Jess's life.

One of the girls, a busty redhead, beckoned Rory to come closer to her with a crook of her finger. After glancing at Jess and seeing him deeply absorbed into conversation regarding some local punk band, she sighed and got up. She joined the girl and four others, most likely the girlfriends of the guys Jess was talking with, several meters away from her boyfriend and her comfort zone.

"You're with Mariano?" the redhead asked, and Rory was reminded of Francie from her Chilton days. It looked like this girl was the leader of the little group.

"Yea," she replied meekly, wondering if that would fly well with the girls.

"How long?" asked the girl again, fiddling with the ties on her halter top like Rory wasn't interesting enough to hold her full attention.

"A few weeks. Well, we dated in high school, but that was a really long time ago."

"You wanna smoke?" another girl asked, this one blonde. Rory politely refused her, and the entire clan grinned.

"She's a good girl," one of them snickered, and Rory felt her cheeks redden.

"Can't see why he'd be with a good girl. Jess is a very, very bad boy." Red hair cocked her head and grinned challengingly at Rory, as if daring her to ask for clarification. Rory kept silent, trying to become telepathic so she could summon Jess over to help her.

"And a quiet one. Jess like's 'em loud." They all giggled, and Rory gritted her teeth. She caught the gist of the conversation. They were talking about what Jess was like in bed. It suddenly hit her that he could have slept with any of these girls before her. She stared at the sand, wondering why tears were threatening to well up in her eyes. She'd known about his past. She just didn't like it speaking to her face.

"Does it talk?" came the sarcastic inquiry, breaking into her thoughts.

"I talk," she retorted, not knowing how else to respond.

"So why, of all the chicks in the world he could be with, is he with you?"

"Because he is, and that's all you need to know." She was testy now, and it showed.

"No need to be a bitch, I'm just asking." The girl held her hand out professionally. "I'm Kat, the old you." Rory shook Jess's ex-girlfriend's hand, and all the girls laughed hysterically. She'd known she was being mocked when Kat extended her hand, but the others found it extremely funny.

Jess looked up from his conversation at the hyena-like giggles, noticing Rory sitting by Kat and her girls. He sighed, knowing they were giving Rory a hard time. But he didn't want to go save her and make her look helpless. He knew that, pushed hard enough, Rory could fight back.

"Well, aren't you polite?"

"I was raised to be nice to people, even when I'm jealous of them," Rory responded, getting annoyed at the girls' behavior.

"You got me, I'm jealous. I'd kill to be flat-chested, or pale as a cloud." Jess heard their laughter again, this time meaner and more hostile.

"Seeing how that's what Jess is into, I can see why you feel that way." Rory smiled sweetly at the scowling girl, glad her mother had raised her to hold her own in a battle of wits.

"Give him another month, sweetie, and he'll be bored. He always does this. You're nothing to him, and no matter what he says, the second he sees something better, he'll toss you out. You think each of us hasn't had a thing for him, fucked him, broken up with him before he could drop us? Jess isn't Mr. Wonderful. He's a hell of a fuck, but he won't stick around. Forget about how he was in high school. He'll never love you, and he'll never take care of you." Rory's eyes burned with tears that started to fall with those last words, and the girls looked at each other, not daring to believe Kat's luck. They'd made her cry.

Rory stood up and headed for the boardwalk, leaving Jess behind. She needed to get out of there, she couldn't just sit there and listen to those mean girls tell her that Jess didn't love her, and would leave her as soon as he got bored.

Jess didn't see her leave, and it took until one of his friends pointed it out for him to notice.

"Where's your girl?" He looked over his shoulder to the group of gossiping girls, and didn't see Rory among them. Worried, he stood up and walked over to them.

"Kat, where's Rory?" he asked suspiciously.

"She headed thataway, I think." She smiled sweetly at him, and Jess inwardly groaned.

"What did you say to her?"

"We just had a little girl-talk, told her all about you. She was such a nice girl, we wanted her to know what she was getting into when she climbed into bed with you." He cursed, glaring at her.

"Rory is not just some girl, she's THE girl. You don't have to believe it, but I love her. And if that isn't 'me', then fuck it. I don't have to explain myself to you." He headed towards the direction Kat had pointed, hoping she was telling the truth.

Rory found the place her and Jess had eaten her first night here, near Jimmy's hot dog stand. Her stomach rumbled and she remembered she hadn't eaten in almost two hours. Taking her little change purse out, she counted four dollars and thirty-one cents. Enough for a hot dog.

She waited in line for a few minutes, wiping tears from her eyes with the side of her pinkie as she did, trying to forget Kat's painful words. 'He'll never love you'… Jess said he loved her, but what if it was all an act? What if he'd told Kat, and the blonde in the pink suit, and the other blonde the red suit, and every other girl he'd ever had sex with, those same words? What if Kat was right?

"Rory? What are you doing here?" came Sasha's voice from behind the counter. Rory looked up, and sure enough, Sasha stood there, looking skeptical.

"Hi. One please."

"Where is he?"

"He's on the beach with some people. One of the girls said something and I just had to get out of there."

"Does he know where you are?"

"He might." Sasha sized her up with a glance, and sighed. She shouted over her shoulder to one of the workers, and disappeared from Rory's view. She came around the building and put her arm stiffly around Rory, walking her away from the stand.

"Now, what's wrong? You look like you've been crying."

"Jess's ex-girlfriend is on the beach, and she's really insensitive."

"They all were. What did she say to you, sweetie?"

"Nothing, I don't even know if it's true."

"Rory, forget about what I said last time. Yea, I love Jess crazy much, but now I'm concerned about you, and I promise I won't hurt you. Talk to me, pretend I'm your girlfriend. What's on your mind?" Rory sighed, and gave in to Sasha's will.

"She said Jess would never love me, that he'd break up with me as soon as he got bored." Sasha cursed under her breath, mentally noting to yell at Jess for ever getting involved with the bitch who had said that to Rory.

"Honey, Jess apparently hasn't made the best choices concerning who exactly he sleeps with the past few years, but I put two and two together and I think you've got something to do with that. I know he loves you, I can see it when he looks at you. He didn't care about any of those girls. They were distractions to try and get away from you. He's not going to leave you, I promise." Rory didn't look cheered, so Sasha sighed and spoke again.

"I've never seen him this happy," she said truthfully. "He loves you. Don't let that skank make you think any different." They sat down on a bench and watched the sea for a few moments.

"You think?" Rory asked finally. Sasha smiled.

"I know." Rory nodded and smiled back, not afraid of Sasha anymore. Sasha seemed to sense what she was thinking, and grimaced.

"I wanna apologize for being a bitch to you the night you came over."

"Oh, you weren't a bitch, you were just looking out for Jess."

"Yes, I was. I acted just like Jimmy and your loser boyfriend did when Lily brought home a boy who wanted to take her to Formal. I didn't want to be a strict mom, I wanted to be a cool mom who got along with her kid's girlfriend, especially if she was as great as you. Something just got into me, but I swear, it's long gone now." Rory grinned and pulled her feet up beneath her, enjoying chatting with her new friend.

"So now I'm gonna stop trying to be cool, and trying to be motherly, and just be me. You sleeping with Jessy?" Rory laughed and covered her mouth with her hand, somehow having known she was going to ask that.

"You could call it that," she responded, as Sasha copied her and tucked her feet underneath her.

"He any good?"

"Last time I talked to you, you were telling me how much he's like a son to you, and now you're asking me this?"

"Hey, I'm a blunt chick. Of course I'm asking. It should be expected that I'm asking."

"Yea…he's great."

"Was he your first? I mean, I know you dated way back in the day." Rory sighed.

"No, he wasn't. He almost was, but it was a really stressful time for us, and we weren't doing too well together, and things ended with him leaving not long after that. I wish he had been, though."

"How did someone like you end up with the bad boy in town?"

"I don't know myself, we just had a lot in common. I had this boyfriend at the time, Dean, but I kinda wanted more, and then Jess moved there." Sasha nodded knowingly, probably reminiscing about past loves before Jimmy.

"Dean made me feel safe, you know, like nothing was out to get me and I was living in a perfect world. Jess made me feel like there were scary, real things out there, but he would keep them away no matter what. Dean couldn't compare to someone who made me feel safe like that." Sasha nodded as Rory felt the need to keep talking about Jess, berating herself for believing Kat.

At that moment, said dark-haired boy came up behind Rory and saw her sitting and talking with his father's wife. He breathed a sigh of relief, not having known where she was.

"Ror?" he asked as Sasha stood up and left, winking at Rory. Jess sat down in her empty seat, taking Rory's hand.

"Why'd you leave?"

"It's stupid now, but Kat was being mean, and I got hurt, and left."

"What did she say? Whatever it was, I promise you it's not true."

"I know. She said you didn't love me, and you'd do the same thing you did to all of them, leave when you got bored."

"Rory…none of them were what I was looking for. I was looking for you. I love you, okay?" He reached out and turned her chin so that her deep blue eyes were looking into his own dark ones, and she smiled at him as she kissed the hand holding her face.

"I know. I shouldn't have doubted you. Hey, Sasha's neat after all."

"What did you two talk about?" he asked with a roll of his eyes, scooting closer and putting his arm around her.

"Nothing…"

"She asked you about US, didn't she?"

"Maybe…"

"Dammit Sasha, can't keep her nose out of my life!"

"She just loves you, Jessy." He glared at her as she laughed and looked at the blue sky overhead.

"You wanna go back, or should we go home?"

"We can go back, I want you to be able to hang out with your friends. I can tolerate Barbie and her gang for an hour." He kissed her forehead and they walked back to the beach holding hands, Rory feeling silly for ever doubting him.

They reached the group and Jess went back in the direction of the guys, accepting a cigarette from one of them. Rory joined the girls, feeling superior instead of like an outcast. After all, they had been rejected because of her.

"Tears all gone?" Kat asked dryly.

"Yup. Miss me?"

"Not really."

"Coincidence, I didn't miss you either." Kat stood up and walked towards the guys, and two of the girls followed. Two stayed behind, however.

"I'm Regina, and this is Kim," the remaining blonde offered, not smiling but not frowning. The girl with darker hair nodded, her face also emotionless.

"God, it's like Madeline and Louise all over again," Rory stated, thinking of two of her old friends. They'd kept in touch since graduation, however, and sometimes gathered in Hartford to have lunch and chat.

"Who?" Kim asked, confused. Ah yes, just like Madeline and Louise.

"Two girls I went to school with. They used to hate me, but we're sorta close now." The girls nodded and dismissed it, and began talking about hair color. Rory joined in the conversation whenever she knew enough to interject, and they passed the afternoon in civil discussion. When Jess appeared beside her to tell her they were leaving, and she said goodbye to Regina and Kim, she felt that the day hadn't ended badly at all.


	18. A little late, but there you go

**The White Stripes own the lyrics…I know they never indicated that Jess or Rory were Stripes fans on the show, but peoples' music tastes do change over time, at least a little. And it's my story, so therefore I get to subliminally order you all to listen to White Blood Cells. **

**I'm so happy – they're showing episodes with Jess on ABC! I just watched his debut, and I realized something for the first time; everyone says that Amy Sherman-Palladino changed the storyline, because she first said that Jess's dad left two years ago, and then she changed it to the Jimmy storyline. BUT she never said the guy who left two years ago was Jess's dad, it just seemed like it was implied. What she DID make Luke say was Liz "Married the hotdog king, had a kid, he left…" in the same episode- that's Jimmy! Look for it! **

**ladyjane: Hoorah for cake! **

**OnLoveInSadness: Don't I know the feeling…**

Lorelai rang the doorbell to her parents' house, and Emily practically ran into the hall to open the door. For four weeks now, Rory hadn't shown up for Friday night dinner. She was in California with THAT BOY. Emily put her hand on the doorknob and lifted her head. 'Don't make it five weeks,' she silently prayed, and then put on a fake smile and opened the door. Lorelai stood alone on the front step, shifting nervously. She hated coming here without Rory.

"Lorelai, how lovely to see you. Alone." She swung the door open all the way and walked away from it, gritting her teeth.

"She sends her love, Mom," Lorelai said as she took her coat off.

"That's very nice. Tell her thank you for me." Emily marched into the parlor, heading straight for the drink cart.

"Emily? Is Rory here?" Richard entered the room sounding hopeful.

"She's still gone, Richard." Emily poured a generous amount of alcohol into her glass, before offering her husband and daughter any.

"She'll be home soon mom, I swear."

"You say that every week. I want to know exactly when soon is."

"I don't really know, I think she's just playing it by ear."

"Well if you don't talk to her, she's going to end up staying there forever. Lorelai, you're losing your daughter and you don't even see it!"

"Emily, now, Rory's not a child anymore," Richard tried to pacify, but his wife wouldn't listen.

"She's going to throw her life away to be with this boy, and we'll never see her again."

"Mom, don't tell me what to do with Rory, because I'm just as lost as you. Fact is, she can do whatever she wants, and if my opinion doesn't matter to her, then yours sure as hell isn't going to." Lorelai threw her head back and drank her entire glass of wine, feeling a headache coming on. The Gilmores were silent until the maid announced dinner.

Meanwhile, Rory carefully brushed her hair. Jess had something planned for tonight, but refused to tell her what. All he'd said was that it required formal wear. She'd let Lily help her pick out a short brown dress that tied in back of her neck, leaving her entire upper back exposed. Rory loved the soft material, and she'd had a great time hanging out with Lily. She was spending more time with Jess's family now, at least Lily and Sasha. Jimmy wasn't really up for shopping days or chick flicks, but she still got along with him.

She brushed her eyelids with pale eye shadow, and stepped back to look at herself in the bathroom mirror. A knock at the door made her smile and step into her shoes.

"Come in," she called, taking one last look in the mirror. She looked pretty good, for her.

Jess opened the door and found her sitting on the counter, buckling the little clasp on her heels. She looked beautiful tonight. He'd made the effort and donned straight pants, a collared shirt, and a jacket. He'd known the jacket he wore to the author's convention would come in handy. Jimmy had advised him to wear a tie with the ensemble, but Jess settled against it.

"You look nice," was his only greeting as he leaned against the doorframe, taking her appearance in. She nodded towards her shoes, where she was struggling with the clasp, and he moved towards the counter. Taking her foot in his hand, he easily did the clasp with surprisingly deft fingers. They locked eyes as he finished, and bent over to kiss the curve of her foot left naked by her strappy shoe.

"So stop being so secretive, what have you been plotting?" He put his hands in his pockets and shrugged, smirking. She sighed and stood up, taking the arm he offered. They walked through the house, Jess's heart beating far faster than it was supposed to. Tonight HAD to be perfect, or he'd never forgive himself. He'd come up with the idea about a week ago, and had spent every waking moment since then planning it.

He covered her eyes with his hands and led her outside to the patio, before planting a small kiss on the nape of her neck, and letting go. She looked at the scene in front of her, a huge grin coming to her face. The small, two-person table that normally sat in Jess's kitchen had been moved outside, and a burning candle sat on it next to a single rose in a skinny vase. A CD player sat nearby, 'Hard to Explain' by The Strokes playing lightly.

"What's this?" Rory asked, crossing her arms and fighting to keep from smiling.

"Prom." He stated simply, guiding her towards the table.

"Aww, you're so cute. You didn't have to do this."

"I'm trying to make up for everything. You never got to go to prom, therefore I bring it to you." He pulled Rory's chair out and she sat down, still beaming. He sat across from her and took her hand.

"I wish things had happened differently. I wish this was Star's Hollow, and Lane and Dave were here, and I was going to school."

"Shhh. Things turned out okay in the end. We're together, aren't we?" He smiled back at her, and reached under his chair, taking out a small plastic box. He opened it and slipped a pink corsage onto Rory's wrist.

"There. A little late, but there you go." She stared at the flower on her wrist, melting. He had no idea how adorable he was being.

"I'd lean over the table and kiss you if the candle wasn't here." Jess stood up and walked over to her, bending over so he was right in front of her. She leaned in and kissed him tenderly, lingering.

Once he sat down again, he reached down and took a piece of paper out from under his chair. Rory wondered what else he had stashed under there, but he handed the paper to her, and all was forgotten. It was a menu, written in Jess's fluid, small handwriting, with a very small selection on it.

"Hmm, I'll have the Angel hair pasta, and the red wine, and the lemon cake." He grinned as he stood up again and took the 'menu'. "When did you have time to make this?"

"When you were out with Lily today."

"So all that serious writing you had to do was…"

"A complete and total lie." He stepped inside to get their food while Rory sat and grinned like a maniac. Tonight was going on the list of best nights in Rory's life. Jess had obviously gone to great lengths to make this perfect, and he was pulling it off. He stepped outside, balancing two plates and closing the door with his foot.

"I'm having diner boy flashbacks," she teased as he set her food in front of her. He'd spent the afternoon cooking the simple, scrumptious meal, and waited for her sign of approval before eating his own.

"Oh, yummy!" He smiled to himself, and dug in.

Lorelai ate her desert, some sort of peachy thing, in silence. No one was speaking at the Gilmore house. Everyone chewed and preoccupied themselves with their own thoughts. Each thought about Rory.

"We'll hopefully see both of you next week," Emily stated as Lorelai left fifteen minutes later.

"Bye Mom," she returned, but the door was already closed. Sighing, Lorelai climbed in her beloved Jeep, and drove to Luke's.

She sat at the stool she'd claimed as her own long ago, and gave Luke her best puppy face. Shaking his head, he took a mug down from the shelf behind him, and filled it with coffee.

"How'd they take it?" Luke asked, handing her the cup.

"Like they always do. I've come to the conclusion that they hate me, and the only reason they were semi-nice to me all those years was because they liked Rory."

"She'll be home soon, and then they can go back to being semi-nice to you."

"I keep telling myself that, but she doesn't show any signs of getting ready to come home at all."

"Well, she can't stay there forever, right?"

"I don't know. I keep thinking this is Rory, there's nothing to worry about, she'll do whatever makes the most people happy. And then I put myself in her place, and I think, what if you moved to the far corners of the earth?"

"California isn't exactly the far corners of the earth, Lor."

"…And I wonder, would I just forget all my responsibilities and obligations, and follow you like a puppy? And I mean, Rory can write wherever. The only thing that's really holding her in Star's Hollow is us. You, me, Lane, and everyone she grew up with. Not all kids live at home forever, and though it'd kick ass if Rory was one of the exceptions, I want her to be happy. What if it's time for her to move on?" Luke didn't say anything, just handed Lorelai a tissue from the box under the counter as she started to cry.

As they finished eating, Jess cleared the table and glared at Rory, as if daring her to make the 'diner boy' comment again. She smiled smugly and kept it to herself, but he knew she was thinking it. When he came outside again he went over to the small stereo he'd brought outside, and sifted through the stack of CD's next to it.

"Rancid, or White Stripes?" he asked, holding up two cases.

"Quite the range to choose from there," she commented, joining him by the CD's.

"Yea, well I've had to expand my tastes in music. They refused to forward my Punk Planet magazines here," he explained.

"White Blood Cells," she decided, naming a Gilmore treasure. He put the CD in, and 'Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground' began to play softly. He took her hand and pulled her towards the center of the patio, where he pressed her against him. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Rory swayed to the music, dancing with her Jess.

"I never want to leave here," she confessed quietly, into his shoulder.

"I never want you to leave," he responded guiltily, wondering if he should be persuading her to go back to her mother.

"What are we gonna do, Jess? I can't just stay with you forever and pretend I have full intentions of going home."

"Then you should go," he said sadly. He wanted her to be happy, even if it wasn't with him.

"I don't want to go."

"Rory…you go home to Lorelai, or you stay here. It's what it all boils down to."

"You'd let me stay here? Like, live here?"

"Of course. But you have to do what's best, and I don't know if moving to California falls under that category."

"You did it."

"Because I had nothing in Star's Hollow. You have everything there, that's your life Rory."

"But you're my life too now. Are you actually telling me to leave?"

"I want you to make the right choice. I don't want you to feel like you have to stay here just because you love me."

"I-I don't know what to do."

"I don't expect you to make up your mind right now."

"How much time do I have?" The song ended, and 'Hotel Yorba' began. It was a difficult song to dance to, but they were just holding each other and rocking back and forth anyway.

"I'm not going to give you a deadline to choose, but you need to do it. You can't just avoid making a decision and tell yourself this is just temporary."

"I want to stay," she admitted, biting her lip.

"Lorelai," he said with a sigh.

"She doesn't need me."

"But she's your mom and your best friend."

"I could call her all the time. And visit. And E-mail. Maybe even snail mail, we've always wanted to try that."

"Okay, that's scenario number one. Scenario number two, you go home."

"I'd miss you too much."

"We're hypothetically speaking here, Rory. What would happen to us if you went back to Star's Hollow?"

"Nothing," she said sadly. "Nothing would happen, because even in long distance relationships, there's the implication that if things work out, they'll get married, or at least live together someday." She danced in silence, before saying what was on her mind. "And I know you won't go back to Connecticut." He sighed in her ear, not wanting her to ask him that.

"Rory, I'd go back if you honestly wanted me to, but I don't think it would work. As long as you live there, you care about what everyone thinks. We go there, we're always going to have issues. We're always going to have something to argue about. What if that kills us?" She nodded against him, realizing he was right.

"Jess…as hard as it is to imagine a life without Lane and Miss Patty and Kirk and Mom, I can picture it. I can't picture a life without you anymore. I don't know how I did it, college, and work, and life itself, without you for so long. I can't go back to being the person who doesn't have you in her life."

"Then stay," he whispered, no longer trying to convince her to think rationally. He'd heard her reasoning, and he no longer had the willpower to keep from begging her not to leave him. What would he do if she went back? The house would be empty; hell, his life would be empty.

"I love you," was all she said, but it was very clear what her choice was going to be. She'd make a Pro/Con list, she'd consult her mother, and she'd spend several mornings alone on the beach pondering it. But in the end, they both knew what choice she'd make.

As she mused about a life with Jess, she thought down the road. She'd never tried to picture herself grown up, with kids and a husband, because it had seemed so far away. But her latest words rang in her ears, as the words of the song reached her.

_It might seem silly  
for me to think childish thoughts like these  
but I'm so tired of acting tough  
and I'm gonna to what I please  
lets get married  
in a big cathedral by a priest  
cause if I'm the man that you love the most  
you could say I Do at least_

He heard the words as well, smiling as he lost himself in a conventional day dream.

**Gah, no flamers!…If this is already the plot of someone's story, I never read it, and I decided to do something different. Well, actually, if you want to send me a flamer review, I'm not stopping you. I'm just saying I prefer being showered with praise for my original ideas. **


	19. I'll tell you when I get there

**LivingintheOCsucks: Glad you're enjoying this.**

**Encarta: Aww, you make me feel so loved. **

**Sony31: You're my 200th review! Thanks hon! **

**Everyone: It's gonna take a little longer than normal to get the next chapter up. Not too long, because I tend to lose my train of thought for the story if I go too long between updates. But unfortunately, my sister and I are being shipped off to our aunt's house for Spring Break, and, to make a long story short, the computer is only for "work". Blech. Please enjoy this, and send me lotsa pretty reviews! If I can sneak on the computer for just a few minutes and read some, I think I'll be considerably cheered. **

"Guess who's back?" came the raspy squeal from the diner door. No one had to turn around to identify the source of the voice. This had been happening a few times every year since Liz and TJ got married.

"Hey bro, we're back from the past," Liz said as she slid into a seat beside Lorelai. Lorelai waved in greeting, but didn't stop shoving forkfuls of scrambled eggs into her mouth.

"She's late," Luke said in explanation for his girlfriend's behavior. "So, uh, how was the fair?"

"Oh, it was great! TJ and me got this great spot by the main exit, so when people are fixing to leave and they want one last little souvenir, there we are. It's so much fun, you have to just come and hang out one of these days."

"One of these days," he agreed in his Luke-like way, meaning never.

"So, me and TJ haven't been through this old town in a while. What is it babe, eight months?" TJ had entered right at that moment, looking pleased that he had found the diner without assistance.

"Seven and a half," he said precisely, nodding at Luke as he took a seat on Liz's other side.

"Right, seven and a half. So what's the gossip?"

"Liz, how about you come by the Inn later, and we'll catch up. We'll have lunch, we'll gossip, we'll-Oh my God, look at the time. I have to go, I'll see you in a few hours! Bye Luke!" She ran out of the diner, pulling her coat on. Liz turned back to her brother.

"I can't wait a few hours, give me some headlines!"

"Do I look like Miss Patty? Because if I do, I want to know what you've taken in the last 24 hours."

"No, you don't look like Patty, and if she was here I'd ask her. But she's not, and you're the next best thing."

"I am not the next best thing,"

"Yes you are." Luke rolled his eyes and got two coffee mugs down.

"Can you handle a big-boy cup, or should I get a sippy-top?" he asked TJ, who didn't catch the sarcasm.

"I can handle a big-boy cup, thanks for asking though." Luke stared hard at the man for a few seconds, before shaking his head and going to pour the coffee.

"Just one little itsy bitsy scandal!" Liz pleaded, giving Luke her best impression of a puppy-dog. There was very little likeness, but it was the face she used when she was out of ideas. Luke sighed.

"Fine. When's the last time you talked to that kid of yours?"

"Don't change the subject, and why?"

"He showed up in town two months ago."

"Here? This town?"

"Yep. I thought you two talked."

"We do, pretty frequently. First Sunday of every month."

"Right, because that's frequent. What has he told you he's been up to lately?"

"Well, he's still in California, and he did some traveling with Jimmy's wife's kid."

"Wow. You do realize you don't know anything about him?"

"Luke, he's young and therefore mysterious. I figure, hey, at least we're talking. The personal stuff we'll get to later. So tell me why he was here?"

"He had to pick something up."

"I thought you sold the car years ago, what else could he be picking up?"

"Rory." Liz blinked.

"Lorelai's kid? That Rory?"

"Yup."

"Why would he be…OH! That's so cute! I never would've thought Jess had it in him."

"Yea, tell that to Lorelai. She was supposed to be gone a few days, she's been out there for two months."

"Well, brother of mine, you can't fight love."

"That's right. You tell 'em, Lizzie," TJ echoed.

"So how did he do it? Did he sweep her off her feet?"

"No, he just showed up, completely surprised everyone including Rory, and somehow managed to make her mad enough to come with him. It was all this crazy town could talk about for weeks."

"It's still adorable. And she's still there, which means he's doing something right."

"Or he's holding her against her will."

"Luke, come on. I know Jess isn't always the nicest kid, but he wouldn't do that."

"I know," Luke admitted with a sigh. "We're just scared of losing her, I guess." Liz nodded, being able to relate. TJ nodded, because his wife was doing so.

Rory sighed, going over the list in front of her again. She was trying to make a Pro/Con list, but it wasn't telling her anything. She had little in the Pro Star's Hollow column, but whether it was by intention or oversight she didn't know.

"Hungry?" came the question that broke through her thoughts, forcing her to look up. Her boyfriend was standing in front of her, bearing a sandwich.

"For me?" she asked in a happy tone, thrilled that Jess had been sweet enough to make her food.

"Mine. I'll make you one, though."

"Peanut butter and jelly!" she gushed, smiling up at him. He bent over to kiss her, and went inside to get her sandwich. She settled back in the chair, and stared at the list again. She was just stalling, she was going to stay. It was just a really big step for her…she'd never lived more than thirty minutes from her mom, and now she was moving to California. It felt better to know that she'd gone over every aspect of the plan, and that it still seemed like a good idea. Making lists and charts helped keep her calm.

But she knew that she'd have to tell Lorelai soon. She'd been here so long, her mother must suspect it. But she had to tell her, and she had to go see her one more time before she officially made the move. And she had to get her stuff.

"I think I'm gonna fly back to Connecticut to say goodbye, and get some of my things," she said to Jess when he returned with her snack. He nodded, kissing her forehead. She'd never officially said she was staying. It had been more of an unspoken communication that they both were aware of. Her vocalizing it, and closing her notebook with a sigh, just meant that the waiting period was over.

Later that night, she called Lorelai.

"Giovanni's house of lingerie, this is Marissa speaking," her mother said breathily into the receiver.

"You are never to answer the phone again," she scolded her. Lorelai had developed some creative ways of answering the phone. Rory would never forget the time Emily Gilmore had called "The Lorelais' house of whores".

"Daughter!"

"Mother!"

"Guess who's back for a few weeks? Liz and TJ, and according to Luke, Liz is completely thrilled that you're with Jess."

"Well that's good, because things are going really well." Rory began to panic. She was going to tell her mother she was moving in with Jess, just like that? And Lorelai would accept it?

"That's good. Now honey, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, I have to ask for the five thousandth time, when are you coming home to me?"

"I was actually thinking sometime this week." Lorelai perked up.

"This week! That's soon!"

"I know!" She couldn't do it. She couldn't tell Lorelai, she didn't like Jess. She never even fully accepted Rory's decision to visit him. She couldn't tell her she was staying.

"So, I'll see you in a few days. And I want to talk to you about something serious."

"What's up sweetie?"

"I'll tell you when I get there." Maybe, hopefully she'd have the nerve by then.

"Well, okay. If you say so, it can wait. So…what did you do today?"

"I finished a chapter, went for a run along the beach-"

"Whoa whoa whoa, you were exercising?"

"It's fun. Jess does it all the time, and I insisted he let me join him today."

"Voluntarily?"

"You know, some people do enjoy it. Now, I'm not saying I'm going to go join a fitness club or anything, but it was nice to just run. It's kind of therapeutic."

"I'll take your word for it. How's Jess?"

"He's fine. He got this inspiration strike yesterday, and he's been furiously typing pretty much ever since."

"Don't forget to water and turn him."

"I won't. Although he's been remembering to take care of himself remarkably well; he even made me a sandwich today."

"If that's not love, than what is?"

"I know, right? Luke makes you burgers, Jess makes me PB and J, and Sharon helps Ozzy make his own."

"Yea, but we have it better than Sharon, because our men have respectable mentalities."

"Then again, neither of them have been on Ozzfest."

"You're right. I'll slip Luke something in his tea tonight, by tomorrow he'll have severe brain damage!"

"And to think, all he did was make you a burger…"

Rory had decided to fly home. The bus would take too long, and it would be lonely. Jess was staying behind to continue working on his book. In addition to having frequent strokes of inspiration, they'd agreed that his being there when the town heard Rory was leaving them wouldn't be wise.

"They just called your flight," Jess said, his voice betraying amusement. Rory had been staring out the window for over twenty minutes, and hadn't looked up when the announcement was made.

"Oh, that was it?" Jess sighed, and reached over the gap between their metal seats to hug her.

"She won't be mad. Not at you anyway. Stop worrying, remember the list." She nodded, inhaling deeply. Jess smelled like soap and salt. To her, that scent was the sweetest thing she'd ever smelled, and she'd miss it while she was in Star's Hollow. Her only comfort was in knowing that she'd swiped one of his t-shirts to sleep in while she was there.

They stood up and Jess walked her to her gate, one arm casually draped over her while he carried her luggage with the other.

"I love you," he said, standing on his toes and kissing the top of her head.

"Love you too," she returned, pulling his face down so that she could give him a proper kiss.

"My best to Luke and Lorelai. Liz too, if you see her." She walked forward and handed her ticket to the attendant, before heading for the little door that led to the ramp. She turned just before she went through, and waved at Jess. He nodded in return, and she exited the airport.

"You're taller!"

"Mom, I'm not taller. Even if I was at an age where I was still growing, I wasn't gone that long."

"I disagree, two months is far too long to be away from your favorite mommy." Rory smiled sadly, as her and her mother walked arm-in-arm out of the Hartford airport.

"Everyone will be so excited to see you. In the past three days, I've had five people ask me if they could throw you a party, 12 people ask me if they could come with me to the airport, and 42 people ask me if you changed you plans and got here early."

"It's nice to be loved."

"Well, we can't help it. You're so fabulous that the world stops spinning directly on its axis when you're not around. I swear, the center of gravity shifted."

"To?"

"California."

"We're going to rent you some old Billy Nye tapes when we get home," Rory commented sarcastically.

They pulled up in front of the diner, and got out of the car.

"Rory!" came from at least four directions. She yelled 'Hello!' back as loudly as she could, before going with her mom into Luke's. The owner came and gave her a big hug, before heading off to get them coffee.

"Tell us all about California!" Miss Patty gushed. Rory looked around and saw that most of Star's Hollow's gossip chain had gathered in Luke's. Luke himself rolled his eyes, and began getting more cups out.

"It was so beautiful. And warm. And it smelled pretty."

"Tell us all about Mr. Mariano," Patty said, slyly. She stuck an unlit cigarette in her mouth, scowling at Luke, and pretended to smoke it. Luke's non-smoking-only policy had hit her hard.

"He's doing okay, I got to meet his Dad and his family."

"The man who made Jess leave?"

"Jimmy's nice, and anyway, Jess would have left regardless," she defended.

"Are you two officially a couple?"

"Yea," Rory said with a happy-blush, what he'd said to her the other night coming back to her. 'We're going to live here in this kingdom by the sea, me and my Lorelai Leigh,' he'd said in reference to the Annabel Lee poem. She'd giggled and blushed, curling up to him in the white cotton sheets of their bed. 'Someday I'll make you my wife and then everyone will know I love you and you're mine.' That had been a drowsy afterthought, one that Rory would hold in her heart.

"How is the long-distance thing going to workout? Is he moving back here?"

"No, he's not moving here. It'll cause too many issues. We've got it all worked out, though. Luke, can I have some pie?" The women were so excited to have the town princess back, they didn't notice her casual change of subject. As he fetched her pie, though, Luke did. And he knew something was up.

"I can't believe it! An entire meal and not one crack at our eating habits! You need to go away more often!" Rory smiled as her mom amazed over Luke's behavior, and felt a slight tug at her heartstrings. She had to do it. She wanted to do it soon, so it could sink it. She didn't want to tell her, but she wanted more than anything to return to Jess. So she took a deep breath.


	20. This was my choice

**It appears I have incurred the wraths of many people by going away for a week. I'm sorry, take it up with my crazy mother! But yea, I didn't want to leave you guys hanging, so I thought I'd finish off chapter 19 and post it before I left…and it appears, I created a cliffhanger of monumental proportions. I apologize. So, without further ado, let's pick up where we left: Rory took a deep breath. Exciting stuff. **

"I think you should ask Luke if he wants to move in with you," slipped out of her mouth. For a second, her and Lorelai stood there, staring at each other. She hadn't meant to skirt around the issue. She'd planned on telling her mom straight-out that she was going to California- permanently. However, one of the pro's from her list slipped out instead.

"Um, okay. But I think that'd be weird. It's always been just me and you, and I don't want to lose that roomie thing we have going for us."

"Well, here's the thing. I'm going back." Her brain was screaming at her to just get it over with, but her mouth was taking its sweet time.

"To California?" her mother asked, sounding confused at a bit hesitant.

"To Jess." Realization dawned on Lorelai, and Rory looked past her so she wouldn't have to witness the emotions rushing through her mother's eyes.

"Honey…no." Rory looked at her sharply, wondering if she'd heard her right.

"No? You're forbidding me to go? I'm not asking for you permission, Mom, I'm telling you I made a decision."

"No! You were mine first, he can't have you!" Lorelai stomped her foot childishly, tears pooling up behind her trademark blue eyes.

"You were lucky, you fell in love with a guy who lives within walking distance from your house! I didn't; my guy lives on the other end of the country. And if I have to go to the other end of the county to be with him, I will."

"Rory, please don't do this to me," Lorelai begged, tears falling freely now.

"I'm sorry mom, but I love him. And…and Luke can move in with you, and you can pick the movie every night, and you can use my room as an extra closet…" Rory hadn't noticed herself start crying as well, but she had. Sobbing, Lorelai pulled her into her arms, and they stood on the sidewalk in front of Gypsy's, crying and hugging.

After a while, Luke walked up to them. Taylor had told him where they were, and mentioned that something appeared to be wrong. He approached the weeping ladies, and draped his arm over them. Leading them home, they held onto each other and continued crying. No one who saw them knew why, but Luke had a pretty good idea his nephew was involved.

Rory awoke on the couch, with her mother half-draped over her. Grunting, she wiggled out from underneath her and yawned.

She'd told her. They'd cried. She was sad that Star's Hollow soon wouldn't be her home, but then she thought about what she was getting in return for giving her old life up. A pair of dark, playful brown eyes…and a smirk that held more tenderness for her than it betrayed.

Jess. She'd been away 24 hours, and she missed him. She debated getting up to call him, but Lorelai stirred.

"Wake up, sleepyhead," she whispered, shaking her lightly. Lorelai opened her eyes, all mascara washed off of their fluttering lashes and now resting on her cheeks.

"You're back," she stated, smiling. At once it faded. "But you're not staying."

"I had to tell you in person. And I wanted to get some of my things," she admitted.

"When are you going back?"

"I was thinking of hanging out here for a few days, do a little bit more mother-daughter bonding before I move."

"Move. It sounds weird. We've lived here forever, both of us." She pulled herself up so she was sitting, and the two simultaneously crossed their legs Indian-style.

"Do you hate me for doing this?"

"I could never hate you, babe."

"Don't hate Jess. This was my choice."

"I don't hate Jess, I'm just a little shocked that things are moving so fast for you guys. I mean, Luke and I have been dating for what, six years? And you stay with Jess for two months, and decide to move across the country for him."

"You and Luke have the luxury of taking it slow; neither of you are going anywhere. Me and Jess don't have that option. It was either this, or give him up for good. I can't do that, Mom."

"You really love him, don't you?" Lorelai asked, cocking her head to the side. She smiled sadly, and held her arms out. "Aww, my baby's a woman now." Rory snuggled in her mother's arms, feeling just as safe as she did in Jess's embrace. They were the two most important people in her life, and they'd always protect her. She hated being in the position of choosing one or the other. But in the end, Lorelai would always be her mother. Jess would not always be so readily available.

"So much. I've never felt like this before. The only time that even comes close is when I was seventeen and we'd sit out on the bridge, reading to each other. It may sound crazy, but I honestly want to be with him forever."

"You're showing it too. Moving is a big step, especially when it takes you from one coast to the other."

"I'll call. All the time. And I'll visit, and write, and I won't shut you out."

"I appreciate it," Lorelai said, playing with a piece of Rory's soft, brown hair.

"I'm sorry; I know this must be hurting you. But I can't leave him. Not now, not ever."

"I know. I can't stop you, and even if I had that kind of power, I wouldn't be able to bring myself to do that to you." They shared a smile, happier this time, and stood up.

"Coffee?"

"Do you even have to ask?" The quickly changed and rinsed their faces free of last night's tears, and headed into town.

"So after breakfast, how about I tell Michel I'm taking a few days off and we can hang out before you officially change your address?"

"Sounds great."

"You'll have to go to Friday night dinner tomorrow, and tell your grandparents. You will NOT make me do that when they finally get suspicious and realize you've been gone for three years. I'd start planning what you're going to say now, so you can let them down easy."

"Will do." They sat down at a table in Luke's, and waited for service.

"I'm going to miss you. I can't say I'm thrilled about this, but if it's something you need to do, then I'm not stopping you. It's not like I have any say in this anyway; you're grown," Lorelai said quietly so only Rory could hear her. Rory reached across the table and took her mother's hand.

"You have no idea how much I'm going to miss you. I love you, Mommy."

"Same here, kiddo." Lorelai squeezed, and Luke walked over to their table.

"You two okay?"

"We're fine," Lorelai said with a grin, releasing Rory's hand so she could take Luke's. He looked down at their hands, and Lorelai cleared her throat.

"Moveinwithme?" she asked quickly, holding her breath. Luke blinked.

"What?"

"You could finally use your dad's office for an office, and relocate all your flannel shirts and baseball caps to my house."

"I don't mean to offend, but I don't think I could take living with the both of you."

"Well, lucky for you, Rory's moving out."

"What?"

"I know. I was a little traumatized when I first heard, but I'm in the first stages of acceptance by now." She placed her free hand over her heart dramatically.

"Rory's moving out? To where?"

"Guess," Lorelai responded, a little dryly.

"No." Realization hit quickly, harshly. "You are not going to LIVE with that deadbeat nephew of mine."

"What about your deadbeat nephew?" Having perfect timing, Liz walked into the diner, TJ on her tail.

"Yea, I am," Rory said to Luke, her eyes daring him to find something wrong with her decision.

"Rory! I heard you were in California with my kid!"

"You heard right," she said, wondering how much Liz knew.

"How is he? I haven't talked to him in weeks."

"He's good. It's nice to see you again," she tactfully changed the subject.

"Oh yea! The fair was incredible, but it's nice to be home…"

That night, mother and daughter stood in their kitchen, preparing snacks for their movie night.

"So did Luke give in yet?"

"I think it'll take a while, but I'll wear him down. He'll move in if for no other reason than to shut me up."

"You know, if he says 'no', and you don't want to be alone, you could get a cat," Rory suggested with a grin, knowing her mother's fear of becoming an old 'cat-lady'.

"Egad, no! No kitties, no matter how cute and fluffy they are!"

When her mother had fallen asleep during Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Rory turned the TV off and covered her with an afghan. She tiptoed into her old room and closed the door. Pulling her phone out, she remembered the secret calls she'd made to Jess years ago. Lorelai either had no knowledge of them talking for long hours, or she believed Rory was calling Dean.

"Talk," the phone rudely answered. Grinning and shaking her head, she responded.

"I told her."

"You did? How'd she take it?" His tone became much warmer as he realized who it was.

"Well, she didn't ducktape me to the 'Welcome to Star's Hollow' sign, but she's pretty depressed. I think she'll survive, though."

"Does everyone know?"

"Just her and Luke. I'm going to tell the town and my grandparents sometime in the next few days, and I'll be home by next week."

"That's too long. I miss you."

"I miss you too," she replied, realizing the conversation was about to get very sappy unless she steered it away.

"So, where's your novel heading?"

Rory took a deep breath, and Lorelai wrapped her arm around her daughter's shoulders.

"I just realized that I have less than a week to say goodbye to everything," she whispered quietly.

"Having second thoughts?"

"No. Just wishing it was easier to let go." Lorelai rang the doorbell, and the two hung back, waiting.

"Hello Lorelai- Rory!" Emily stepped onto the front step- something she'd never done while greeting guests- and hugged her granddaughter.

"You're back! Why didn't you tell me she was back?" she snapped at Lorelai.

"We wanted it to be a surprise, Grandma," Rory mollified, smiling at her.

"Come in, come in! Richard! The girls are here, both of them!"

"Rory's here?" her grandfather called from his study.

"Come see for yourself!" Ten seconds later, Richard Gilmore was walking in.

"Rory! I can't tell you how thrilled I am to see your face again!" He pulled her into another hug as Emily began fixing drinks.

"Rory, what can I get you?"

"Whatever you're having sounds great, Grandma." The four sat down on various couches and chairs in the posh living room, and the elder Gilmores looked at each other and actually grinned.

"How was California, Rory?"

"It was great, I met some interesting people." Sasha appeared in the back of her mind, urging her to make Jess wash his sheets free of the sand they often accumulated. Rory didn't mind the sand anymore. It was one of the things that she'd come to identify with Jess. It was as familiar to her as the faint taste of smoke that always lingered days after he smoked the occasional cigarette.

"And I'm assuming the ocean was lovely?"

"Beautiful, big, and blue." She looked around the room, mentally taking notes. This would most likely be the last time she attended a Friday night dinner for quite some time.

"Did you get any work done on the beach?" Richard sounded genuinely interested in her trip, while Emily sat there and beamed.

"I did, actually. It was very calming, just sitting by the ocean and writing."

"I'm glad something good came of this trip, although you are never to leave us hanging like that again, young lady!" Lorelai choked on her wine.

"What's the matter, are you alright?"

"Fine, Mom, just went down the wrong tube." Lorelai shot Rory a look, saying 'tell them now', and Rory shook her head. She couldn't disappoint them during before-dinner drinks. Maybe during desert…


	21. Jess won

**Encarta: Agreed, Lorelai is important too!**

**I would like to dedicate this chapter to all of the people who, like me, cry every time they watch "Here comes the Son". Just to reassure you that yes, there are others like you. I strongly hope people who read this actually do cry, or else I'll feel like a loser. Ah well, there's Narco-trashing below. Go on, read read. **

"This is great, Grandma."

"Thank you dear, it's Austrian Cheesecake." Rory took another bite, relishing the taste. She'd forgotten Emily's talent for hiring skilled cooks, even though she herself didn't know how an oven worked. Lorelai sent her another look (she'd been doing that all night), and Rory sighed.

"Grandma, did my mom tell you I was visiting someone in California?"

"Yes, she did." The cheeriness went out of Emily's voice, and was replaced by faux politeness.

"Jess told me to say 'hi' to you."

"Well that's very nice. Next time you call him, tell him I return his hello."

"Don't hate him Grandma, you never really met him."

"Oh, I met him alright."

"That was a bad night for him. And he's changed, so much. Even Mom can stand him now." Her mother glared at her, suddenly involved.

"Yea Mom, he's halfway decent now." 'You owe me' she mouthed to Rory.

"I still can't see why you'd go visit him so soon, and for so long. I mean, from what I've heard, he didn't do such a great job of keeping in contact with you, and then you just pack your bags and fly out to California, where the only person you know is this boy?"

"We took a bus," Rory began, but saw the look of horror in Emily's eyes.

"A bus? That's his mode of transportation, a filthy, smelly, overcrowded bus?"

"It wasn't that bad. Anyway, Jess and I are together now." Richard, as unfamiliar to the mind of a young girl as he was, nodded. He'd suspected his Granddaughter wouldn't be gone so long on a friendly social visit. He'd guessed right when he'd thought Rory was involved on some level with this Jess character.

Emily, however, was stunned.

"Why?" was all she could ask. Being born and bred in a life of privilege, a man's wealth was one of the things that made him appealing. It was all fine that Rory dated middle-class men when she was in high school, but she'd thought Rory was over that. She'd dated their friends' son Logan for a while, another corporate son, Finn, and some other young men introduced to her by Richard and Emily.

And now she and that ruffian were together?

"Because I love him, Grandma." The three others in the room looked at Rory, stunned. Even Richard was stunned along with his wife that she'd reached this stage. And Lorelai's mouth hung open after hearing her daughter freely admit that to her parents.

"Rory, you're young. You're bound to think you're falling in love, you're even supposed to. Sweetie, it's called puppy love, and it's always mistaken for the real thing." Emily's tone was soothing, like she was speaking to a ten-year-old.

"Grandma, I'm not that young. I've been in 'puppy love' several times before. That's how I know this is real. I'm moving to California to be with him."

A shocked silence fell over the table. Lorelai was the only one who continued to eat her cheesecake, while Richard and Emily stared.

"You're moving to California?" Emily asked as if in a daze.

"To be with this boy?" Richard hadn't foreseen this much, not at all.

"Yea. I'm leaving in a few days, but I'll visit. And call and write," she finished, saying exactly what she'd said to her mother, and exactly what she'd say to everyone else when she told them.

"Lorelai, you can't let her ruin her life like this!" Emily turned on her daughter, once again blaming her for Rory's unexpected behavior.

"Rory's a big girl, Mom. If she wants to do this she can, it's not my decision. And this cheesecake is rocking my socks."

"Rory, please. You'll regret this, it may look like he's changed, but he'll leave you again. And then you'll be heartbroken, and alone, and far away from your family when you need them."

"Because you know him so well, right?" Rory retorted bitterly. When Emily hung her head and stared at her lap, Rory hurried to apologize. "I really don't want to fight about this. I've made up my mind, I'm going to Venice Beach to live. With Jess. For good. I don't want to leave with you hating me, I really hoped this would be a nice, memorable goodbye." Emily nodded, and then called for the maid to clear the table. Richard returned to his study, and Emily escorted the girls to the door.

"I really didn't want to hurt you," Rory apologized as they left. Emily stood still, pondering how to respond.

"Rory…if he ever hurts you, or does anything wrong to you, you will always have a place here. Do you hear me?"

"Yea, but he won't. I'll miss you, Grandma." The two hugged, and when Rory pulled apart, she ran inside the house with a strangled sob.

"She didn't squeeze Dad to death yet," Lorelai explained apologetically.

"You're okay with this?" Lorelai took a deep breath as she tried to find the words to explain what she was going through.

"As her mom, I'm scared of losing her. As her friend, I want her to take this chance. And I want it to work out." Emily nodded. She mumbled a goodbye to both of them as Rory came back, dabbing at her eyes, and the two left. Richard walked into the entrance, and stood next to his wife as they watched Lorelai's beloved Jeep pull away from the house.

"I'm going to miss that little girl."

Rory had missed attending the monthly town meetings. Her, Lorelai, and Luke walked in a straight line towards Miss Patty's, already late.

"Everyone, walk slower. And be more dramatic."

"What?" Luke asked his girlfriend, clearly confused.

"Charlie's Angels here, kids. I wanna be Farrah Fawcett!"

"Ooh, I'm Kate Jackson!"

"Which means you're stuck with being Jaclyn Smith, Lukey."

"Who are these women again?" Mother and daughter looked at him, open-mouthed.

"Where the hell were you in the seventies?"

"Outside, playing baseball with the other normal kids."

"I'm making you watch every episode I have on tape!"

"Don't worry; she only has 30 out of 115," Rory whispered to him. He groaned, and walked up the steps to the dance hall. Rory stopped, and took a deep breath. The older couple turned towards her, concerned.

"I'm fine," she said, answering their unspoken question. "It's just hard. Saying goodbye so much, so quickly."

"You don't have to go back right away. You could stay here for another week, watch Charlie's Angels with me and Luke."

"I'm not watching Charlie's Angels," Luke interjected.

"Wanna bet? Anyway sweetie, you could stick around a bit longer, couldn't you?"

"It's easier getting it all over with quickly," she replied. Looking at the quite streets, she reminisced about all the times she'd done something as simple as walk down those Star's Hollow roads. Thoughts of racing Lane, dodging the occasional car, came to her. But just as quickly, they were replaced by memories of walking leisurely around, her mouth sealed to Jess's. It was funny- she used to have problems walking and chewing gum at the same time. She'd grown accustomed to walking AND having Jess's tongue down her throat at the same time. She made a mental note to 'walk' down the boardwalk with Jess one of these days.

Luke pushed the door open, and the entire gathering's heads snapped back to look at the late arrivals. Most of them stirred excitedly when they saw Rory. Everyone knew she was back, but she and Lorelai had been hermits the past few days. They stayed inside, watching all their favorite movies, ordering food, and talking. They'd only been to the diner that once, and several people had missed her then.

"Rory Gilmore, long time no see!" Taylor exclaimed from his position at the front podium. "Young lady, you have been sorely missed."

"I missed you all," she said earnestly, beaming at her neighbors. Babette waved at her jovially, Patty winked, and Lane was bouncing up and down in her seat. She let her mom know she was sitting with Lane and Dave, and approached them. Lane jumped onto her husband's lap, making an empty seat for Rory.

"I missed you," Rory whispered, hugging her best friend.

"Same here. How's things at the store?" Lane had taken over at her family's antique store after her mother had gone back to Korea to live with her cousin. Dave helped her run the place, and the two rehearsed with their band in the midst of chairs and tables.

"Great, but why are we talking about me? I want to hear all about you! I only got ONE phone call while you were out there!"

"I know, there were a lot of people I wanted to call. To make up for it, I will now be sending you a Rory newsletter, packed with interesting little facts about my day-to-day life."

"Good, I miss knowing what's going on with you. How were things with Jess?" The two stopped their whispering when Dave cleared his throat, and they noticed everyone watching them.

"Ladies, I'm thrilled Rory is back, but could you please have your little reunion at another time?"

"Sorry Taylor!" Rory apologized, giggling. She listened to the town going-ons for the rest of the meeting, until Patty took the floor.

"Taylor, I know this isn't official town business, per say, but I want to welcome Rory back as a town." Everyone nodded, and Rory stood up to growing applause.

"Rory, sweetie, we're so glad to have you back. Star's Hollow wasn't the same without you." Rory frowned, and looked at her feet.

"Rory, are you alright?"

"I've got a little announcement, Patty. I'm moving to California in a few days." Stunned silence greeted her broadcast, and she sat back down. Beside her, Lane stared along with everyone else.

"What?"

"I'm going to live with Jess," she said, quieter. Dave let out a long, low whistle, while Lane stuttered.

"But-but you can't!" Lane said, clearly having no idea as to WHY Rory couldn't, but not wanting her to just the same.

"I am."

"Don't try to talk her out of it, her mind's made up," Lorelai called from the other side of the room. The townspeople looked confusedly between the Gilmores, Rory's announcement still sinking in.

"You're moving in with that hoodlum?" Taylor asked, his face completely puzzled.

"And I know you'll all be happy for me, and support my decision," Rory finished, instructing people in how to receive this.

"Is Jess treating you like a princess, Baby?" Babette asked worriedly. Rory grinned.

"In his own Jess-like way, he is." Babette nodded, satisfied. If Jess was being good to Rory, this was good. This was great, in a tear-jerking kind of way.

Taylor adjourned the meeting in a daze, and everyone talked animatedly amongst themselves as Rory left the building. She walked out to the bridge, and sat down. She remembered being out here in the day time, a few months ago. He'd asked her to come as a friend, and at the time she hadn't known what would be waiting for her in Venice Beach. Her life, it turned out.

She heard footsteps on the bridge several minutes later, and turned to see Dean approaching her.

"Hey," she called. She'd be glad to see anyone who wouldn't chastise her.

"Why are you going?" She didn't know if he'd been at the meeting, but he'd heard somewhere if not there. One thing was for sure, he was not the haven she'd been hoping for.

"Jess makes me feel alive again. In just two months, he became my world. I don't know how to forget that, and try to live without him again." He sat down beside her, making her uneasy. This was her and Jess's spot. Dean had never belonged here.

"Do you really think he's not going to screw you over again?"

"No, I don't," she said honestly, searching his face for true concern. All she saw was anger, jealousy.

"Well, then it's true then when they say love is blind."

"Jess is different. He's not the same person he was when you knew him. You, on the other hand, are the same spoiled, resentful, sulking teenage boy you were back then."

"I just want you to be happy Rory," he said tersely.

"NO, you don't! You just don't want me to be with Jess! You want to feel like you won that particular battle! And as much as I should probably tell you that there were no losers or winners, Jess won. He won me. You have Lindsay, who Mom tells me is pregnant, congrats by the way, and I have Jess. So I'm happy, and if you'd be big and get over this macho need to beat him, you'd be happy too. Now go away, this is my and Jess's spot."

"Is your name on it?" he asked sarcastically. She stood up, and began counting boards. When she reached the desired board, she got down on her stomach and leaned over the water.

"Do you have a lighter?" she asked, used to Jess having one on him at all times, just in case.

"Sorry, no. I'm not your pothead boyfriend." She looked sharply at him.

"Jess doesn't do that anymore. He did in New York, but that was before I even knew him." She knew this from his book, and from several early morning conversations they'd shared under covers. Dean, however, frowned. He'd just flung that at her to make her see how much she didn't know about Jess. He didn't think she'd know whether or not Jess had done anything of the sort. She did, and it surprised him.

She sighed, and rummaged through her pockets. Her jacket had stayed behind while she was in California, so she didn't know what would be there. A candy wrapper, a receipt, a watch whose clasp had broken…

She took the watch out, feeling ingenious. Pressing the button that caused a tiny, blue-green light to illuminate the face, she held it up to the wood.

"Come here," she commanded, and he slowly obeyed. Getting down to the same position she was in, he leaned over and saw the small light faintly revealing JM + RG carved into the wood, and what looked like it could be a circle surrounding it. A circle, or a heart.

"He carved it with his pocketknife," she said, reminiscing, "And wouldn't put a heart around it. He said it was too 'The Little Lady of the Big House'…Jack London" she clarified when his face showed blank. She'd forgotten not everyone was as versed in literature as Jess.

"Anyway, I took my keys and tried to put a heart around it, and he just sat back and smirked, knowing it wouldn't work. You can kinda see it, though, if you look hard enough." She retuned to gazing at the little carving, not noticing her thumb start to scream in pain from the little metal button digging into it. Dean stood up and walked away, realizing that he wouldn't get through to her. She had always been like this when it came to Jess. He fumed, remembering her words. 'Jess won. He won me.' He shook his head violently, telling himself that he was worried about Rory's safety, and that his rivalry with Jess didn't have anything to do with this feeling of jealousy welling up inside him. He had to fool himself into thinking that; he had a baby on the way with Lindsay.

Meanwhile, Rory would end up falling asleep on the bridge, her arm dangling over the side and almost skimming the water.


	22. My daughter, Traci Lords

**Encarta: I agree. Dean reproducing is terrifying, but I had to throw that in. Makes him seem like MORE of a jackass if he already has a pregnant wife when he confronts Rory about Jess. And making Dean look like a jackass is so fun…**

**pubnk: Yesh! Fellow 'Here comes the son' criers. **

**Erinsailorditz: I heart loyal readers. **

Rory packed the last of her shorts into the box, and grinned at her mom.

"I can seriously have this dress?" Lorelai gaped, holding up the dark blue article.

"It's too hot in California. You can have my jackets, sweaters, and some of my pants."

"I don't want the feminist sweaters, but I'll take everything else!"

"I'm taking a few warmer things for when I travel and suddenly find myself in a normal climate, but other than that, they're yours. And I promised Lane she could have some, but you get first pick because you're here on time."

"We can probably chalk that up to our friend Dave, but she'll be here…eventually. Can I have this tank top? It looks great on me; I borrowed it while you were gone."

"I'll be taking that," she said, removing the item from her mother's loving hold.

"Mean," Lorelai commented, sticking her tongue out.

"Is Luke moving in?"

"Still no word, but I can be very persuasive."

"Don't be vile," Rory said, making a face.

"Hey, I didn't make that face when you were sharing the details of your steamy sex life with Jess."

"Which I never did, so either you were having a bizarro dream, or you're making up excuses for your floozyish behavior."

"I like that word! Floozyish! I'm going to use that in conversation!" Rory rolled her eyes and grinned at her mother's hyper antics. Lorelai was psyched for tonight's party. She, along with the help of a few friends, had thrown together a quick goodbye party for Rory, and they were determined to remind her of what she'd be missing. Lane's band would be playing, Patty's ballerinas would be performing, people were making a huge Rory collage to be hung in Patty's, and they were all signing a huge sheet of paper with words of luck and absence.

"So when are you going to call Christopher?" Lorelai asked, her giddy mood slipping a few notches.

"Thanks for reminding me, I forgot," Rory said appreciatively.

"You forgot?"

"Well, we don't talk much, and he's not here. It's not really goodbye for us, just 'hey Dad, I'm moving to California to live with a BOY', and he'll freak out and ask me to put you on the phone and they you'll argue and I'll regret surrendering the phone. Then I'll steal it back, tell him I'm an adult now, and hang up. After that, it will take six to eight months before we're talking again."

"That's not a nice plan."

"Well, he's not going to take it very well. He acts like I'm the same age as G.G.!"

"That's just cause he loves you," Lorelai said, her voice softening. Rory picked up the cordless from her dresser, and motioned that she was calling him. Lorelai nodded and left the room, not wanting Rory to put her on.

"Hey, this is Chris and Lexie's, leave a message," the answering machine announced breathily, and Rory cringed. She couldn't stand her father's new wife. What forty-something woman went by 'Lexie'? She was a good mom to Rory's half-sister G.G., though, and she'd helped Chris get over Sherry. Maybe she wasn't that bad after all.

Beep. "Hey, Dad, it's Rory. Just calling to inform you that I'm moving. I can get my exact address to you later, because the only time I've seen it is on mail, but the general vicinity is Venice Beach, California. Before you start wondering why, I'll be frank. I'm moving in with Jess Mariano, my boyfriend. I'm sure you remember hearing all about him, and I'm sure you're pretty disappointed in me right now, but this is what I want, so please don't make me feel like the whole world is against me. Love you, talk to you guys soon. Bye." She hung up, and Lorelai peeked her head back in the room.

"Done already?"

"Answering machine. I don't know if he'll call back or not. If he does and I'm not here, just give him our number."

"Will do.

Rory clapped and laughed as Patty's ballerinas twirled around, bumping into one another and getting caught on their own feet. They were adorable. And their mothers all sat by the gazebo, taking pictures excitedly. She closed her eyes for a moment, a feeling washing over her like the waves she'd grown so fond of. The old Rory never really thought about getting older, settling down, and having kids.

The new, moving-in-with-her-boyfriend, living-across-the-country-from-her-mommy Rory was definitively thinking about a lot lately. Not that any of it would become a reality for quite some time. It was just nice to think…

Lane sat down next to her, grinning from ear to ear, and interrupted her thoughts.

"What are you so happy about?" Rory asked, honestly curious. Lane said nothing, but her eyebrows went up enough to clue Rory in. "I see, something dirty. Uh…did you and Dave do it in the deserted dance studio?"

"Of course not, today is not about me at all! It's about you, girl, and I just realized I never asked you how Jess was."

"He's fine. He's working on his book as we speak. I believe I mentioned he was a talented writer, and he's working on a story about this white girl growing up in an all black neighborhood, or ghetto, whichever you want to call it. Anyway, her dad is killed by some people really opposed to him and his family, and the rest of the family goes to live with her mom's sister. So she's now in this white suburbia, and she's not used to anything there, she's grown up listening to rap music and braiding her hair in hundreds of tiny little braids, and she doesn't fit it at all." Rory stopped to take a breath, and Lane jumped in.

"You know, I didn't mean how is he in the general sense of the world, I mean how is he…" Her eyebrows rose again, and she nodded expectantly.

"Oh! That," Rory blushed, trying to fight the smile playing upon her lips.

"No comment?"

"No comment needed. He's perfect." The two fell into a fit of giggles as Lorelai walked up.

"Oh no, I just walked in on some serious girl talk, huh?" More giggling greeted her. She was reminded of the time she'd told Sookie about her and Luke making love for the first time.

"Keep it PG-13, ladies. There are small children around. And Taylor."

"It's nothing Sasha doesn't know, so it can't be that bad." Lorelai's eyes widened.

"You talked to Jess's step mom about THAT?" Lane and Rory's lungs began to ache from all the giggling they were doing. Lorelai rolled her eyes and stood up.

"My daughter, Traci Lords," she commented loudly as she walked over to Luke.

"What's that about?" he asked, looking over her shoulder at the two best friends.

"They're talking about what Jess is like in bed." Luke's eyes snapped shut, and he slapped his forehead.

"I could have gone a whole lifetime without ever knowing that."

"You're welcome." Luke walked away, shuddering, as Lorelai grinned and watched Lane and Rory.

"…better than Dean?" Rory blinked in surprise.

"What?"

"I asked you once if Jess was a better kisser than Dean. I was just wondering if Jess still won, hands down." Rory shrugged.

"Well, if I had to judge, I'd say…Jessy." A silly smile lit up her face as she said his name in a sing-song tone, blushing.

"Jessy?"

"Don't tell him I said that. He only lets me call him that when we're alone, and even then he gives me a mean look."

"Sorry, this is just strange. I mean, Jess is a good rebel-without-a-cause, lost-soul kind of name. Jessy sounds like a sweet, mama's boy kind of name."

"Jess is sweet. He just doesn't like people to see it."

"What's the sweetest thing he's ever done for you?"

"Besides buying my basket and saving me from some possessed sprinklers, he made me my own prom." At Lane's clueless look, she continued. "He cooked real food, not just Easy Mac, and we danced, and he got me a corsage!" Rory's voice practically left her as she gushed, just remembering that night. Following the dance they'd shared, he'd pulled her inside and they'd spent the night in a pile of sweaty, entangled limbs under his sandy sheets. The more time she spent away from it, the more she loved the sand. It's coarseness against the smooth fabric was like Jess's stubble against the soft skin of his handsome face.

"That is sweet," Lane admitted. She saw Rory slipping away into daydream-mode, and tried to reclaim her best friend's attention. Rory was not going to space out this close to her moving day. "What are you going to do once you get there?"

"Oh, well, I'm going to finish my book. Hang out with Lily and Sasha, and try to make some friends who aren't Marianos."

"So, no future plans?" Rory sighed.

"We haven't really talked about that. Well, he told me once he wanted to marry me someday, but he was really sleepy. I don't know if that qualifies as 'talking', or if he accidentally put it into a speech-bubble instead of a thought-bubble."

"Oh my God, that's so…Oh my God!" Lane shrieked and pitched forward, hugging Rory. "Oh my God!"

"Lane, air!" The Korean relinquished her hold on Rory, and sat back.

"It doesn't matter it you haven't officially talked yet, he's thinking about it! What about you, are you thinking about it? I mean, I know it's only been two months, but you two are so meant for each other!"

"You freely admit that?"

"Hey, he makes you happy enough to move across the country, you make him happy enough to give you your own little prom and mumble stuff before he goes to sleep! Destiny, thy names are Rory and Lane."

"Yea, I guess it is destiny. A few months ago, I never dreamt I'd even see him again, much less be thinking about that."

"So you are thinking! You're thinking! Oh my God! Tell me everything!"

"There's nothing to tell, I've just been…thinking about it."

"Rory, let me tell you a little about my personal fantasy. Dave and I, married and playing regular gigs in New York with our band. And every morning, after we get home from our show, we get back into bed and pretend we were there all night, and then the kids wake up."

"Aww, you have dream-kids! Do they have names?"

"The boy is Joshua, the little girl is Yoko."

"Wow. Yoko Rygalski. That's an interesting name. Especially when it's paired with Joshua."

"I know, but I picked these names out a long time ago, and I love them. And someday, hopefully sooner rather than later, when Dave and I have kids…I'll tell him about Yoko."

"Here's hoping it's soon," Rory said with a smile, laughing when Lane blushed and nodded in agreement.

"So what are your dream-children named?"

"I actually haven't gotten that far yet. I'm just starting to fantasize the backyard wedding."

"Backyard? That's so…not you."

"You forget- Jess's house backs up to a beach." She grinned and took a bite from the cookie just handed to her by someone. Someone turned out to be Liz.

"Hey Rory, mind if I talk to you for a sec?"

"Depends. Are you going to warn me not to hurt Jess?"

"No, no angry mothers here. I just wanted to tell you that I think this is great. Jess didn't exactly deserve another chance after what he pulled, but you gave it to him, and things turned out great. You two are adorable, even thought I've actually never seen you together. But I can picture it, and it's so cute. Well, I'll let you two get back to talking now, good luck in California." Rory accepted a quick hug as Jess's mother walked away, that word sounding weird in her head. Jess's mother. Liz was nice, but she'd never really been a mother to her son. Sasha filled that position, long-overdue.

"So…now that you've had time to think, what are the kids' names?" Lane asked excitedly after Liz retreated.

"I had one minute to think, and someone was talking to me the whole sixty-seconds!"

"You have to have some ideas, you're a chick. We all do it. My mother told me she picked my name out when she was eight."

"Did she know where babies even came from when she was eight?"

"No. She was going with the angel-wings story. So, tell all."

"I don't know. IF we get married, and IF we have kids, two very big IF's, we'd probably name them after authors. Mark, Emily, Tobias, Jane…whatever."

"Meaning whatever book you were reading when said child was conceived?"

"No, silly, meaning whatever name we liked and agreed on." She bopped Lane on the head childishly, and the two somehow found themselves in a tickle war.

In Boston, the Hayden family entered their apartment, exhausted.

"That was an interesting show," Lexie remarked of the "Nemo on Ice" show they'd attended with their daughter G.G. Chris grimaced in response, and hit the button on the answering machine. At first, he was thrilled to hear Rory's voice over the device. Soon, however, it turned to an upset frown.

"Chris? What's wrong?" He said nothing, just angrily grabbed the cordless and began to dial.

**My sincerest apologies. I have as of late gotten very very angered at my parents, and thrown a vase which hit another vase and both broke. And, among other punishments, I am banned from the computer for two whole weeks. So the final chapters will come as soon as I'm allowed back on. But for now, I'm so sorry. I should have known throwing things was not a good idea (I have to go to counselling now. I am very upset.) **


	23. Punkass Punk

**sPERSON- I really didn't know if it was G.G. or Gigi. I had both on my computer at different times, and finally decided G.G. because her real name is Georgia. I did do some research, however, and TwizTV's Gilmore Girls scripts, which so far has been what I consulted for Tristin, Lindsay, and Babette. It said G.G., so I'm going with G.G. **

**hp/dr fan- I'm sorry you didn't like my chapter. If you were to offer some criticsm, constructive or otherwise, it might help you enjoy it better. If you don't have any, then I suggest you read something you do enjoy. **

**miloluver- Awww… I can't believe I'm the only reason you go online! Advice: It is my personal opinion that I have good taste (cringe), so check out my favorite stories. That'll give you lots more reasons to go online. **

**someone5- I am thrilled to have a number one fan. And I will try and refrain from throwing objects until I have this story completed. **

**Everyone: Thank you for your support of my predicament! I'm back now, and I just finished off this chapter. Hot off the press, but I'm hoping it won't mean I made more mistakes than usual. Normally I miss them anyway when I go back and check. It was so amusing to log on to my email account today and see all the author alerts- I had like 40 because I love that little button. So now I have to find someway to organize them, and then read everything. While I do that, here's chapter 23. **

Rory half-dragged Lorelai through the back door, tripping over a kitchen chair. She swore under her breath as the two fell heavily, waking Lorelai up.

"What? What's going on? Where am I? Who's attacking?"

"It's me, Mom, we fell. I commend the lady who decided to leave that chair in this strategically placed position in front of the door."

"Mmmhmm. Bed." Sighing, Rory grabbed Lorelai's arm and pulled her to her feet.

"Why were you up so late last night?"

"Planning…Rory…party." Her arms screaming in protest, Rory elected to simply dump her mother's almost-lifeless body on her own bed. She lay down beside Lorelai, nostalgia hitting her hard.

"Hey." Lorelai broke the silence after a while. "I can't believe this room is gonna be empty."

"I thought you were asleep."

"I slept on the way home. I should be good for 36-48 hours."

"Of course. Does Folgers know about you?"

"They'd better, as I am their best customer." The two fell into silence again, each quietly breathing and preoccupied with their own thoughts.

"Is Jess the one?" Lorelai asked later.

"Yup."

"It's ironic, us going for Luke and Jess. Kinda like those identical twins who got married at the Inn to –surprise- another pair of identical twins. Not like that? Um, hang on, I'll come up with a better example."

"I know what you mean. They're really closely related, as are we."

"I'm really proud of you for being able to do this, Rory. It took me and Luke forever to admit we had feelings for each other. You and Jess just seemed to fall perfectly into place. I envy you, but I'm also glad I'm not you. I have it easier here with Luke." Rory nodded, feeling the same way. Jealous of her mother's relationship, but treasuring her own.

"Do you ever wish things had gone differently?"

"I used to. But if Jess hadn't left, he wouldn't have grown up. He wouldn't have become this totally amazing person who is so much like the old Jess, but so much more."

"Do you regret him not being your first?"

"I more so regret Dean having been my first. My and Jess's first time was so incredible, and I think it would have been great but not perfect if we'd done it here." Lorelai nodded, feeling more at ease with Rory's words. She began to nod off, but stopped when the phone rang.

"I'll get it," Rory groaned, getting up. She picked the cordless up off her dresser, and pressed 'Talk'.

"Rory Gilmore!"

"Hi Dad, what's up?"

"Please tell me you're joking! Your mother put you up to this, you're not serious."

"I'm completely serious. Don't do this to me, Dad," she warned, rubbing her eyes.

"What are you thinking, Rory? You're not supposed to be the spontaneous one who moves across the country, that's me! That could be your mother if she wanted it to be! But it's not you, this isn't you Rory! Somehow, you didn't inherit either of our minds, so you're supposed to be the rational one!"

"I made a list," she pouted, sick of Christopher's constant excuse. HE made mistakes, he knew LORELAI make mistakes. Yet, Rory couldn't.

"Who the hell is this kid, I want to meet him. And then kill him."

"You will stay away from him," she warned.

"Some punkass…punk, thinks he can just give my daughter and ultimatum and force her to move across four time zones!"

"He didn't give me an ultimatum, Dad. Will you calm down, you're going to have a panic attack. Take a deep breath."

"I'll take a deep breath when I get you out of this mess. How could you be so stupid, you don't just leave your entire life behind to be with some guy, Rory!"

"Sweetie, let me talk to him." Lorelai had gotten up unnoticed, and was holding her hand out for the phone. Despite Rory's prediction that her and Chris were just going to fight, she waited for Rory to hand the phone over. Wordlessly, she complied with her mother's wishes.

"Christoper? It's Lorelai. I hear you have some problems with Rory's new living arrangement, am I right? I am, huh. Well, let me say something before you sic the mafia on Jess. Leave Rory alone. This is her decision, no one else can make it for her. What are you afraid of anyway, losing touch with your daughter?" She spoke the last line sarcastically, earning a sharp retort from Chris. "Yea, well, maybe she IS our daughter after all. You cannot decided that for her, babe. Last time I checked she was 25, and fully capable of making an informed decision. Hang on, I'll ask her." Lorelai covered the mouth of the phone. "Rory, Jess didn't hold a gun to your head and force you to agree to this, did he?"

"Not that I recall."

"He didn't hit you over the head with a piano, did he?"

"That one I'm less clear on, but I'd still say no."

"Chris, she's going according to her own wishes, and she is fully reasonable. Now if you'll excuse the Gilmore Girls, it is late, and Rory's plane leaves in 27 hours. Goodbye. Rory, wanna say goodbye to your dad?" The phone exchanged hands.

"I'll talk to you soon, hopefully." She tried to end the call quickly, but Chris wasn't done.

"California, eh?"

"Yup. Where the sun never stops shining."

"Sweetie, I really do just want what's best for you. Your message kind of shocked me, but I don't want this to come between us."

"Neither do I."

"Yea, so…I need time to digest this. I'll call you sometime there, and I WILL be talking to this punk."

"The punkass punk. Real clever there, Dad." Chris's scratchy laugh came from the other end of the call.

"Yea, when I'm mad, the witty banter kind of comes to a screeching halt."

"Talk to you soon, bye." They ended on fairly good terms, and Rory climbed back into bed next to her mother.

"Thanks."

"See, that wasn't so bad," Lorelai said in Connecticut, as Christopher sighed heavily and sank down onto a recliner.

"Chris? What's wrong, honey?"

"Rory's not a little kid anymore," he remarked wistfully, his mouth smiling but his eyes sad.

"What happened? Rory's boyfriend?" Lexie tried to piece together everything Chris had told her about Rory and the current situation.

"I should have known he was going to be trouble. I mean, I never met him, but he was at the wedding." Lexie didn't ask what wedding, she didn't want to disturb her husband's calm tirade. "I leave her for a second, to answer the phone. It was Sherry, calling about G.G., and I look back, and this guy has his arms around her and they're kissing, and there's some touching going on… And I'm just thinking to myself, 'I saw her with Dean five minute ago.' And not that I was a huge fan of Dean, but he was nice, and well-groomed, and polite. So I see her with this guy, and I get a bad vibe. He doesn't look like he'd respect me at all, he's a complete mess, and he's trying to put his hands on my DAUGHTER'S waist. Little punk! And the worst part is, he drove her to that. To be the kind of girl that cheats on her boyfriend when he's in the same place as her. God, I could have killed him. But Rory looked like she had enough problems without this guy's brains splattered all over her dress, so I just went to talk to Lorelai." Lexie blinked, not understanding. She still moved closer to rub his back, and whisper soothing words to him.

Mother and daughter awoke the next morning side by side. Lorelai's cheeks were covered with tears. It was Rory's last full day here. Rory's cheeks ached from smiling in her sleep. She must have been full out Cheshire-cat grinning, she realized, because the muscles were ablaze. She couldn't help it; she was thinking about her conversation with Lane. And she'd dreamed about raising a small family of dark-eyed children on the beach, reading to them from the classics, teaching them to appreciate good literature.

"My, you're chipper this fine morning," Lorelai quipped as she yawned. Rory copied her, and stared at her ceiling. She knew every crack, every chip, every stain.

"Good dream," she explained, closing her eyes again.

"Was it dirty?"

"Nope."

"Did it involve Jess?"

"Yea."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you supposed to be dreaming about all the alone-time you'll be having with Jess?"

"Not everything has to be dirty, mom."

"Shows what you know. Anyway, what do you want to do today?"

"Watch TV, eat stuff guaranteed to rot my insides, walk around town, and go to Luke's."

"Done." And it was done, all of it. They spent the entire day vegging out, like they'd done when Rory was ages four through twenty-four. They seemed to be suspended in time, watching new shows and old reruns, eating the same food they'd grown to thrive on, and not talking about anything of substance.

On their way to Luke's, just as the sky was beginning to darken, they took the long way. Hands in pockets, they strolled down the familiar streets, waving to people as they passed them. They heard snippets of conversations about Rory as they ambled, listening intently to each discussion.

"He doesn't deserve her," Gypsy nearly spat, angrily watching the Gilmores pass her shop.

"He's a lucky man," an older lady called out to her near-deaf friends.

"…Never thought she'd do this. We're proud of her," Patty's musical voice floated from inside her studio. Smiling at each other, they completed their journey.

"Luke, we're dying of starvation, so come wait on us before we drop like flies!"

"Please, you two have more than likely been eating ice cream and cookies all day. You are not starving."

"Growing…weak…need…burger." Loreali pretended to collapse on the nearest table, which happened to be occupied by Kirk and his sons.

"Hello Lorelai," the three chorused.

"Hey boys. Would you spare some of your vittles for a hungry, dying woman, and her hungry, dying daughter?"

"Do not feed them, Kirk," Luke warned sternly as he guided Lorelai towards an empty table.

"Luke, Rory has to build up her strength for a long flight back!"

"Fine, I will feed Rory. You, on the other hand, have no excuse."

"Thanks Luke," Rory said with a smile, sticking her tongue out at her mom.

"Unbelievable. This is treason! This is blasphemy! This goes against everything our country stands for!" Rory watched the two banter back and forth, sipping the coffee Luke had handed her ("Traitor!"), and wearing an amused smile on her lips. Just as Luke was beginning to break down, her cell phone rang.

"Outside!" Lorelai exclaimed, pointing at the sign gleefully. Payback for not supporting her on the food matter.

"It's starting to rain," Rory pointed out, and Luke sighed.

"Just this once," he said, acting like Rory was going to be back all the time. Rory grinned widely at him, and answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey." A warm feeling spread over her.

"Jessy!" she shrieked, forgetting in her moment of pure happiness that he had instructed her NEVER to use that name in public. A diner full of curious customers, all of which were staring at her right now, would qualify.

"What have I told you about that?" his voice was mock-serious, although she could tell he was a little irritated underneath.

"Sorry," she apologized quickly, ignoring her mother's raised eyebrows.

"I'll let it side if you tell me you missed me."

"I missed you," she said truthfully, ignoring the kissy-faces Lorelai was beginning to make.

"Good. Because I'm fucking bored. There's nothing to do without you here," he complained childishly.

"Get much writing done?"

"Some. Not as much as I'd hoped."

"Your editor isn't going to be very happy with me," she teased, shooting her mother a look. Lorelai had moved on to kissy-noises, and they were very distracting. Not to mention embarrassing.

"Well, he'll just have to get over himself. What is that noise?"

"My mother, being FOUR." She threw a wadded-up napkin at her as Lorelai began to add dialogue.

"Jessy…I love you Jessy…"

"Excuse me for a second." She put the phone down. "Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, act your age!"

"Oh, full name," she pouted. Shaking her head, Rory picked up the phone again.

"Sorry about that. She doesn't know when to stop," Rory explained apologetically. Seeing the rain drops sliding down the diner windows, she stood up. "Mom, I'll be back in about ten minutes, order me something good!" The diner occupants watched her walk out into the rain, still talking on her phone. She paused at a corner and laughed into the mouthpiece. Her wanderings took her to the gazebo, where she sat and watched the rain as she lost herself in sweet conversation with Jess. She was gone about fifty minutes more than the ten she'd promised her mother, and when she returned, her burger had been eaten.


	24. And you have to believe it

**White Stripes own lyrics, although I don't make a big deal about the song this time. Yay for you! **

**miloluver: I've considered making a sequel, but what I've decided is to write a really long epilogue to the story, set in the future when Rory and Jess have kids. It'll be several times the length of my other chapters, but I really wanted to keep all the Pennames stuff together in the same story. Look for it. It will more than likely be chapter 26. **

Rory pulled her wet jacket off as she came in the door.

"Hon, you need to change before you get sick and die."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence in my immune system."

"Oh, anytime. So what did you and Jess talk about?"

"Just stuff." She couldn't really remember a distinct topic, they'd skipped around.

"Okay, stuff. Any stuff in particular?"

"Well, I distinctly recall the words 'Hemingway' and 'Guillotine' being used several times, and in combination, but we really didn't have a subject."

"You do realize that you were gone for over an hour, don't you? Is it possible just to talk about nothing for that long?"

"You do it with Luke all the time!" Rory defended.

"True, but he's right in front of me. I don't think we've ever had a phone conversation that lasted more than five minutes."

"I'll take what I can get. And why are you so interested in what we were talking about?" Rory said this as she slipped out of her wet pants, and into an old pair of modest jeans from her high-school days. Back then, she'd looked like some bizarre combination of tomboy and nun. Luckily, she'd outgrown that stage.

"I dunno, I just want to know what you're going to do once you're all settled in."

"Meaning?"

"I don't know what I mean, I'm just talking off the top of my head. The acid rain water could have affected it, and made me start talking nonsense, but I want to know if this thing with Jess is going anywhere. What I mean to say is…how soon are the grandkids coming?" Rory almost choked in surprise.

"Mom, we're definitely not even close to thinking about that yet!"

"Ah, but you're a chick."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"Because unless A LOT went on in California that we don't know about, I think it's safe to say you are. Aren't you?"

"Yes, of course I'm still a girl, weirdo. I'm just saying that maybe I'm a little more career-focused than most 'chicks'."

"Rory, no one loves their job more than you do. But you could be on your deathbed, and still write a book. I don't think getting pregnant is going to interfere, other than the select male characters who die horrible, gruesome deaths at the hands of a hormonal woman."

"What is with the sudden interest in me getting pregnant?"

"I've just been waiting for the day when the topic of YOU being a mommy comes up, and now seems like a good time."

"Mom, as much as I love Jess, we're not ready to go there yet," Rory claimed defensively. Well, they weren't. Although she was starting to think like 'a chick'.

"I know, I don't expect the two of you to be contemplating parenthood already, I'm just saying, when it happens…be married." Rory looked sideways at Lorelai from the couch they'd plopped down on to shed their shoes.

"I'm not trying to be mean, but who are you to give me advice about that?"

"Harsh," Lorelai responded coldly, settling back into the cushions.

"I know, I'm sorry. I just mean after everything Grandma and Grandpa put you through when they were trying to force you to marry Dad, I'd think you of all people would understand that not everything is black and white, as in the perfect sixties black-and-white prime-time family."

"Rory, I would have given anything for Chris to be the guy. But he wasn't. And it wasn't easy being by myself. I promised myself that if there was anything I'd raise you to believe in, it was the importance of waiting to start a family until you found the guy."

"Jess is the guy, but what does that have to do with being married?"

"It's easier on everyone involved? You, him, parents, children, friends."

"Or maybe you're just feeling very, very…single."

"I've been dating Luke for six years!"

"Exactly. Dating. Has he said anything about getting married?"

"Sorta." Lorelai stood up and headed for the kitchen. Puzzled, Rory followed.

"What did he say?"

"Oh, I don't know, something about not seeing the point?"

"You're kidding me," Rory said in disbelief.

"I wish I was, babe."

"Luke doesn't want to get married?"

"He says it complicates things." Lorelai's voice went from sad to sadder.

"But-but he's supposed to be moving in! Why not just say 'what the hell' and make it legal! He loves you, and he wants to be with you. So what's so hard about signing a paper, and wearing a piece of jewelry?"

"I don't know, but he's pretty firm in his decision." Rory sighed angrily, and stomped over to the CD rack.

"Whatcha doing?"

"Looking for a CD. It's too quiet in here." Finding a good one behind a Used album (which she didn't comment on, as she was trying to help her mother out), she put it on. Lorelai smiled as one of her favorite songs came on, and she bobbed her head to the music.

"Said thirty-nine times that I love you to the beauty I have found…" she sang, as Rory joined her back on the couch.

"Talk to Luke," Rory urged. Lorelai exhaled slowly.

"Honey, maybe it's best this way. I mean, we're still together. We still love each other, and we've still got our little coffee-will-kill-you bit going."

"I don't think Luke means that to be a bit," Rory commented, but Lorelai waved it aside.

"Someday, maybe he'll change his mind. Until then, I'm not unhappy. But, precious daughter of mine, you changed the subject."

"I didn't have anything to say, me and Jess are just…enjoying being young and in love. There'll be a time for talking about marriage and kids and all that, but until then, it's just me and him."

"Promise you'll tell me when that time comes?"

"Hello, of course! Just because I won't be living here anymore doesn't mean that you don't get to be my advice-giver, my confidante, my shrink!"

"Thank you sweetie, I always wanted to be a shrink. It rhymes with pink, so my office will be pink, and everyone will go there so I can help them think, and they can look at blobs of ink."

"Listen to the pretty music, mom."

"Heck no, you can call me butter cause I'm on a roll! Okay, so the office will stink like coffee, not saying that coffee smells anything less than heavenly, and they can fink all about their crappy love lives to me, and I'll just sit there and blink, while I stare at the rug, which will be made of mink."

"You're going to make a rug out of a poor, defenseless animal?"

"It's not my fault it rhymed with shrink!"

"Thank you for not at least incorporating 'dink' and 'wink'."

"Watch me."

A whole week without Rory. Not as unthinkable as it felt like. Previously, he'd spent almost seven years without her. And before that, seventeen long and empty years. So seven days should have been a piece of cake, right?

Instead, the house was empty, the bed was empty, HE was empty. He'd always been introverted, and thrived best when he was alone. But without her laughter and her presence, the seconds dragged by.

He sighed for what could quite possibly be the hundredth time in the past ten minutes. Ten sighs a minute. This was not good.

He sighed again. And again. And again, before he finally threw his hands in the air.

"I give up," he said to no one in particular. Glancing down at the small table where his laptop sat, he tried to concentrate. His eyes wandered from the screen across the table to Rory's seat. She'd loved the café style two-person table. It was situated strategically at the end of the counter, so you could simply glance sideways out the sliding glass door to the ocean as it rolled in. And it was large enough to hold two plates, but small enough that their knees touched underneath. He sighed.

He would have sat there all day and pretended to try and work, but luckily his day was interrupted.

"Delivery," Sasha's voice rang out as she entered the house, keys in one hand and a casserole dish in the other.

"Kitchen," he called, placing his hands above the keys. It at least looked like he'd written something this past hour. His stepmother entered the room and threw open the fridge door with her foot.

"Takes two minutes to heat up, it'll go bad in four days, and there's no meat in it."

"Thanks, although I'm curious as to why you brought me food."

"Haven't seen much of you this week, and I wanted you to be well fed."

"So the fact that Lily's trying out recipes for her Home Ec project doesn't have anything to do with it."

"None at all. By the way, if you like it, let her know." She walked over to where Jess was sitting, hands on her hips.

"Get much writing done while Rory's not here?"

"Nope."

"That's about the sweetest thing I've ever heard."

"Why are you still here?"

"Wanted to see how you were doing. And Lily still has yet to find a decent recipe for her dinner project."

"I'll eat it and let you know."

"It's much appreciated. Pay special attention to how filling it is." She smacked his head affectionately, and then turned to grab her keys and leave.

"Sasha?" Something in his voice made her put her keys back down.

"Yea, kid?"

"Do you ever worry that Jimmy's going to pull a disappearing act?" The question made Sasha blink. Deciding that she had to put down more than her keys for this one, she crossed the room once more, and sat down across from him.

"Where is this coming from, Jess?" She pushed the screen down onto the keys of the computer and watched him drum his fingers on the table. "Is this about Rory?"

"Yes."

"You're afraid she thinks you're going to run off again?"

"No."

"Then I'm sorry, but me no comprehendo."

"Her."

"You think Rory's going to be the one to split?"

"I didn't say that," he said, getting mad.

"Then what the hell are you talking about? That girl's crazy about you, she wouldn't do that to you."

"Where is she now Sasha? She's in Star's Hollow, saying goodbye to practically her entire life. People who knew her before she could walk. People who saw her grow up. People who warned her to stay away from me."

"You're worried about them convincing her to stay there? Don't you think if she was ever going to take their advice, it'd have been a while ago?"

"I'm worried that she won't be able to leave them." There. It was out. He'd confessed what he'd been worrying about for days- she'd realize that it'd been a mistake to move her life. She'd forgotten how much Star's Hollow depended on her while she was in Venice Beach, and she wasn't going to come home to him.

"You're an idiot, you know that?"

"It's my middle name."

"You have a great thing going, and instead of cherishing it, you're worried about losing it. Going back to your earlier question, I know that Jimmy could leave whenever he wanted. I just have to trust him. And you have to trust Rory."

"I do. I'm just unfamiliar with the idea of giving up an entire life just to be with someone."

"Watch daytime television; it'll give you some good advice about that. Just don't have an affair with a nurse who happened to marry your brother in Las Vegas for a night years ago, and then impregnate your childhood sweetheart who's being blackmailed by her sexually-harassing icky old boss."

"Someone has a soap fetish…" he sang lightly, earning a death-glare.

"Forget I ever tried to help you."

"I'm joking; you know I value your input."

"I'm still going home now." She stood up and once again took her keys from the countertop. "I leave you with one last piece of advice- if you're unfamiliar with the idea, it's because you've never had something like that to give up. Trust me when I say that this isn't easy for Rory, but she's going through with it. She loves you. And you have to believe it." Normally Jess would have pointed out that Sasha had given him more than one piece of advice, but instead he turned his head sideways so he could look out the glass doors at the water.

Sasha left quietly. Jess sighed, and then stood up and headed for his room. Grabbing a jacket from the back of his closet, he got into his car and headed for the city.


	25. Correctest

**Sigma Bond: What can I say? Your 'comment' not only stimulated my brain outside of school hours, it made me almost fall out of my swively chair laughing. Thank you for clearing that up ;-) **

Lorelai put on a brave face for Rory as they walked through the airport, arms around each other's waists. Rory had sent two boxes filled with clothes and books the other day, so the only baggage she had was her carry-on messenger's bag, which was currently clunking against her hip next to Lorelai's hand.

The outing wasn't limited to only mother and daughter, though. Her flight time had leaked out through the Star's Hollow grapevine, and at least thirty people had driven themselves to Hartford, and were standing as close to the gate as the suspicious police had allowed them. In their midst were Taylor, Luke, Patty, Babette, and Dean, to name a few.

"So Jess is picking you up?"

"Correct."

"And you will call to tell me when he does so?"

"Correcter."

"And you will leave out the part about the happy reunion?"

"Correctest."

"Then I guess all that's left for us to do is wait, and pretend we don't know them." She motioned towards the group of friends, and they waved excitedly in return.

The two took seats near the gate, and quietly flipped through the magazine Lorelai had bought a few minutes ago.

"Jean jackets are back in," Rory commented.

"I'll take ten."

"Zebra is out."

"Guess I gotta go naked tomorrow."

"And last but not least, Britney's back in rehab."

"I keep losing money on that girl." Rory lifted her eyes from the glossed pages to smile at her mother. Lorelai smiled back, feeling the sadness bubble up inside her stomach again. Turning back to the high-class rag in front of them, they waited for Rory's flight to be called.

As much as Lorelai silently prayed that it had been delayed, or crashed, or simply couldn't leave because California had finally fallen off the face of the earth and the pilots no longer knew the coordinates, her number appeared on the giant black-and-green screen across from them. Seeing it, the two Lorelai's stood up simultaneously and Lorelai the mother tucked the magazine into Lorelai the daughter's bag.

"Plane reading." Nodding, although fully intending on reading Lord of the Flies, Rory watched the screen and waited for them to be loading. As she did this, she scanned the other flights that were scheduled to depart, and had recently arrived. She noticed a plane had landed only minutes ago from LA, her destination, and focused on her own flight once again.

Her phone rang, startling both of them out of their trance. Rory opened it, and smiled when she saw "His cell" light up on the screen. She'd played with it just this morning, as she stood in front of her mirror and hyperventilated. But then she'd pulled her Jess-box out from the back of her closet, and sifted through it. A few books that contained intimate notes (Howl he could read and just leave interesting thoughts and comparisons in the margin. Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair, he could not. She still blushed when she read them.) A picnic basket. A Clash shirt. The dress she'd worn at Sookie's wedding. The dress she'd worn at the dance marathon. Distillers tickets. A CD by The Shaggs.

And, just like that, her nervousness had evaporated. She'd closed the box and put the address on it, before carrying it to the still-closed post office. Leaving money and a note, she left it by the door. No one would disturb it. It was Star's Hollow, after all.

She'd returned to the house and debated calling Jess, but it was 3am in CA. So instead, she'd played with her address book. She'd cried when she changed 'home' to 'Lorelai and Luke', and she'd smiled insanely when she changed 'Jess Mariano' to 'home'.

"Hello?" she asked playfully, pretending she didn't know who was on the other end.

"Are you on the plane yet?" he asked exasperatedly.

"No, they're not boarding yet. Why, do you miss me?" Lorelai pretended to make a face at Rory's teasing tone, and was poked in retaliation.

"Not at all," he breathed, feeling relief wash over him. He'd been afraid he would miss her. "For curiosity's sake, what are you wearing now?" Her eyes widened slightly as she giggled, nearly forgetting her mother's presence.

"I promise I'll be home soon," she stated, a silly grin still on her lips.

"Blue shirt, grey skirt?" She looked down at herself, and to her surprise, was wearing those colors.

"Yea…what are you up to?" Suspicion overcame her, making her stomach flutter and her heart thump giddily.

"I think I just saw your mom drop something…you'd best bend over and pick it up before airport security sees and tries to arrest the both of you." She shrieked and spun around, searching behind her near the incoming gates.

He was leaning up against a red and blue wall, smirking as he hung up. She dropped her bag at a startled Lorelai's feet, and began running and pushing past people. Reaching him, she jumped, literally, into his arms, and he spun her around a full 360 degrees before remembering to act uninterested and unfazed in public. He put her back down, smirking, and she leaned in for a short, sweet kiss.

"What are you doing here?" she asked in amusement, as he put his arm around her and began to walk her back to her bag.

"Couldn't concentrate."

"That still doesn't explain how you ended up on the wrong side of the continent yet again."

"Just keeps happening."

"I'm so glad you're powerless to stop it." She leaned her head on his shoulder and grinned up at him. He returned it, before facing Lorelai.

"You don't have the best sense of direction, do you?" she asked, now holding Rory's bag.

"Lorelai."

"Jess."

"Are you aware that half the population of Star's Hollow is here?"

"Yea, they're trying to keep a respectful distance. Um, why exactly are you here? You're going to see her in a few hours anyway."

"I was very bored," he explained, trying to look serious.

"Uh-huh."

"And I thought to myself-" he was cut off as Rory stepped lightly on his foot. Whatever sarcastic remark he had been about to make, he kept to himself. Impressed, Lorelai looked over at the townie bunch.

Babette had tears in her eyes. That was to be expected after the whole twirly-thing. Dean was clenching and unclenching his fists, as Lindsay regretted agreeing to come today. Luke stood there, shocked at his nephew's sudden appearance, and even more shocked at his tender reception of Rory.

At that moment, the plane that would take Rory (and now Jess) back to California was announced. Jess disentangled himself and Rory to allow her to jump into her mother's arms as Lorelai let loose a large sob.

"You REALLY want this, right?" mother asked daughter, holding her tightly.

"More than anything," daughter replied to mother, reassuring them both in their moment of sorrow. Rory gave one last squeeze, and let go of her mother before it became too hard. She stepped back against Jess, her teary blue eyes an exact replica of her mother's.

"Call when you get home."

"'Course." Jess took her hand and led her away as she waved back to her mother. Lorelai smiled at the two of them, choking back her tears, and felt Luke's presence as he approached.

"What was that about?"

"He came across the country to see her a few hours earlier." She stopped waving as the two turned a corner, and were out of sight.

"That was dumb."

"That was adorable," Lorelai corrected. Luke rolled his eyes as he reached for her hand, and led her in the opposite direction.

Rory pulled on the back of Jess's neck, and he moved closer to accommodate her. She smiled into the kiss as they walked down the nearly-deserted boardwalk, recreating their Star's Hollow days. From a bench nearby, Lily looked up and saw the two approaching. She thought to wave, but decided against it. They wouldn't have noticed it anyway. They were in their own little world. Shaking her head and mumbling something about PDA to herself, she returned to her book.

They wandered around until kissing and walking became too hard to do in combination, and then collapsed on a nearby beach.

"Pretty water," Rory muttered, too emotional for complete thoughts.

"Pretty Rory."

"Pretty Jess."

"I'm stopping before this gets dumb." Rory snuggled up against her guy, staring out at the setting sun.

"This is really nice."

"I agree."

"I feel like we should…promise something, or confess something."

"And you feel this way because?"

"I don't know. It'd be fun?"

"Will this be a passing urge, or do we have to go and get emo?"

"Nope. One promise, one confession each." He stared at her for a minute before quietly agreeing.

"You first."

"Okay. I promise I will always be there for you to talk to when you're scared or hurt or confused. Your turn."

"I promise I will always trust you with whatever I'm going through. I won't try to deal with it by myself. And I'll always be here for you likewise."

"I…don't know what to confess," she admitted with a laugh, breaking the silence that had settled after their informal vows.

"This was your idea."

"I know, but I can't think of anything you don't already know. Help me."

"When did you first realize you were into me?" She stared at him skeptically, squinting.

"That's your idea of a confession?"

"I wanted to know." Simple and honest.

"Okay then. What do you want, when I first realized you were special, or the moment of truth when the angels started singing hymns of 'Rory Gilmore likes the bad boy'?"

"Both."

"That's not fair, that's two confessions!"

"I'll reimburse you, two from me too."

"Fine. When you drew the chalk-outline." He looked a little confused as to how that would elevate him in her eyes, when she explained. "I was standing there with Dean, and I looked up and saw you leaning against a light post, completely out-of-sync with the entire town, with this adorable smirk on your first. You were so different from the crowd standing around me, from my boyfriend next to me. You were new, and somewhat dangerous. You were brave. You were what I wanted to be. And you looked really good in the light outside." He burst into laughter as she finished.

"That's when I realized you were intriguing, and that I wanted to get to know you! Don't laugh!" He smirked at her, making her smile. "Fine, but you owe me another confession."

"First you finish."

"Well then, when I figured out that I 'was into you', as you so eloquently put it, I was in school. Calculus, I believe, and I was extremely bored, and my mind started wandering. And it went to you and when you came downstairs to the diner in Luke's old hat and shirt."

"Go any further?"

"I was just thinking about how funny it was, which led to thinking about how funny you were, which led to more leading and more thinking about you. And then it kinda hit me full force, that I wasn't thinking about you in a friendly way. And then it did a U-ie, zoomed back and hit me the other way that I didn't think of you in a friendly way. But now it's your turn, and you owe me three confessions."

"Bracebridge. Where I first realized I liked you as more than the beautiful, shy bookworm. Swan. What beaked me and gave me a black eye right before I met your Grandmother. Me. Who stole the bracelet Dean gave to you."

"YOU stole my bracelet?" She looked taken-aback, never having suspected him.

"You were fiddling with it at the auction picnic and left it on the bridge. I didn't know it had anything to do with him, so I borrowed it for a little while."

"Why?"

"Because it was yours." He didn't seem to feel the need to elaborate, and after she thought about it, she didn't either.

"Heh. A swan." He sighed, realizing the weight of the ammunition he had given her. But she didn't say anything else in that moment, just listened to the harmonious sounds of their breathing, and a yawn which one of them started, and then (as all yawns do) was echoed by the other, and then the first, and then the second, and on and on.

"Thank you," she said after awhile.

"For what?"

"For being you, for telling me that stuff, for coming to pick me up at the airport, for coming to Star's Hollow in the first place, for inviting me to stay here…"

"All in a day's work."

"I love you."

"I know this. I love you too."

"Know what we should do?"

"Huh?"

"We should get married." Jess looked at the tiring girl beside him, not sure if it was the salty air and warm sand making her say that.

"Should we?"

"Why not? I'm here, you're here, and we both plan on being here for quite some time."

"Yea, but that doesn't mean we have to make it legal yet."

"If we already know we love each other, it's just a piece of paper, and some nice words, right?" Salty air and warm sand aside, this was her speaking.

"Yea."

"I'm not saying tonight, Jess. I'm saying soon."

"Soon sounds good." It was her turn to look at him, judging how serious he was.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"So…are we engaged now?"

"If you want to be."

"And we're getting married sometime in the near future?"

"That's the consensus."

"Can we get married on the beach?"

"That goes without saying."

"Can we invite Mom and Luke?"

"Only if Luke wears a suit."

"Are you going to wear one?"

"No. I said if Luke wears one."

"Can I wear white?"

"I'm not going to stop you."

"Can we have a baby?"

"We'll see. Any more questions?"

"Can I kiss you now?"

"Maybe." He was cut off by Rory's lips on his own. He discovered, as her face brushed his lovingly, that her cheeks were damp. "Are you crying again?" She gave a short laugh.

"I've been having a very emo day." He pulled her back to him with one movement of his arm, and silenced her tears- tears of sadness, joy, hope, and everything in between.

**_A/N: I didn't know exactly when to end this, so I finally decided that Rory and Jess planning their humble wedding on a beach was the perfect way. However, the story is not over. Look for a super-long upcoming chapter, the epilogue, which takes place as vignettes several years in the future. I'll post it as the twenty-sixth chapter, just to wrap this thing up. It'll be in vignette form, just because I have a lot I want to do with it. _**


	26. Epilogue

**StephieM- Thanks for being my 300th reviewer!**

**hp/dr fan- All is forgiven ;-) **

**Note- You guys have no idea how much you have meant to me these past few months. I've written fanfiction before, but this is the most acclaimed site I've posted at. And my first fic here, my first Gilmore Girls fic ever, I get this many reviews. I'm completely blown away by all of my readers support, even if they haven't been reviewing…I can still feel the love. A new story (literati, of course) is in the works, and I'm a little scared for it. This story just took off, and suddenly it had tons and tons of fans. I'm hoping the next one will have similar effects, but I don't really expect it- I'm not that good, and I know it. So thanks a thousand times for your support. Not that anyone's reading this paragraph anyway. **

**BTW, I hope everyone catches the Bronte references. **

_Epilogue _

"Hold your horses, I'm coming!" Rory exclaimed as she dug through the couch cushions in pursuit of the ringing phone. She reached the last cushion, and still no phone.

"Jess!"

"Fridge!" She scampered across the living room area to the kitchen, not even questioning why the phone would be in the refrigerator. He was right- it was behind a jar of honey mustard. She answered it just as it was about to give up, and go directly to the answering machine.

"Hello," she said, out of breath.

"13."

"Uh, 22?" she answered, recognizing her mother's voice, and guessing Lorelai was spurting off random numbers again.

"Nope. 13."

"13 what, mom?

"13 years with Luke, and yet still single. Huh. Weird."

"Mom, please don't be allusive. I have four babies with colds, despite the fact that we live in extremely hot California, and I got little-to-no sleep. I'm too exhausted to read between the lines."

"Luke finally gave in and proposed!" Rory shrieked, causing her husband to come running.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his frantic dash from the bedroom, and his common cold-affected eyes making him look half-rabid.

"Mom and Luke are getting married! You did say 'yes', right?" she quickly asked for clarification.

"Hell yea!"

"Mom and Luke are getting married!" Jess gave an exaggerated thumbs-up, before retreating down the hallway.

"Tell me everything!"

"Well, we were just sitting at the table, eating spaghetti, and talking about how much our jobs sucked. Even though we're both our own bosses, but never mind that. So then he goes, 'you still want to do that thing?', and I was like 'what thing?', and he got all nervous, and was like 'you know, the thing.' So I was all confused, and I'm sitting there like 'bungee jump from the statue of liberty? Because that was just a joke,' and he's getting all frustrated, and I'm getting all confused, and he finally just yells 'Do you wanna get married or not?'!" Rory screamed again, and jumped in place.

"And then you said yes…"

"And then I said yes, and he gave me a pretty little ring, and it was so perfect!"

"Oh my God, that's so great! When are you thinking of having the wedding?"

"Well, in a few weeks."

"You're kidding! That's soon!"

"I know! It's going to be pretty casual, and as small as we can get in this town, and since it's outside I wanted to do it just before it got too cold to go sleeveless."

"Wow, when do you want us to come out?"

"Anytime really soon, I need your help planning!"

"Done. Just let me wait until Jess and the girls recover, and we'll all be out there."

"Perfect! In addition to getting married and FINALLY getting to see what phenomenal present my mother has for me, I get to see my daughter and my granddaughters again!"

"And you son-in-law," Rory reminded teasingly.

"Bring him along if you have too…I guess the children will need a babysitter while you and me are out tasting all the yummy cakes, right?"

"That's why I'm making him come," Rory affirmed.

"Good. I gotta run, me and Luke are going to tell the town at the meeting, so we have to get going."

"Tell Luke I love him!"

"Will do. Tell your hubby he's not so bad either." They said affectionate goodbyes, and hung up. Even though there was a great physical distance between them, they still had managed to remain close. There hadn't been as many visits as planned, but they still talked often.

Rory trotted back to her and Jess's bedroom.

"We're going to Star's Hollow next week."

"Oh joy."

"You will behave."

"I'll turn into surly teenage-me."

"I fell in love with surly teenage-you," she teased.

"Yes, but now you're used to full sentences and commitment, and all that jazz."

"I think you can speak in full sentences for a week."

"We'll see."

"I can't wait to tell the girls, they'll be so excited!"

"Can't see why…"

"Oh come on, weddings are fun!"

"I went to enough of my mom's weddings to know that's not the case."

"Oh yea? What about Sookie's wedding? Because that was a good wedding." He smirked at her.

"One exception. Weddings still suck."

"Liz and TJ's wedding. Mom and Luke got together."

"That was going to happen sooner or later anyway."

"OUR wedding. That didn't suck so much, did it?" She lay down beside him, praying she didn't get sick from the close contact. He turned to look at her, his eyes full of something she was familiar with, but never could find words for.

"That one was okay." He twisted so he was closer, and kissed her cheek before pulling away. Rory smiled at him, then stood up and went across the hall to check on their youngest daughter, Anne.

"Mommy," she stated pathetically when her mother walked in.

"Annie, sweetie, are you still sick?" She nodded and stuck her thumb in her mouth. Rory moved over to the bed, stepping over the pile of children's books on the floor. "Let Mommy take your temperature."

After about five minutes of squirming, Rory managed to keep the thermometer in the three-year-old's mouth long enough for it to register.

"99.7. Poor Annie, can I do anything to make you feel better?"

"Winnie the Pooh." Rory sighed, and went to the small TV sitting in the corner. She set up the desired movie and left the door ajar on her way out. A quick peek back into her own bedroom revealed Jess to be out like a light, so she continued upstairs.

They'd had the extra floor, housing three rooms and a bathroom, built during Rory's second pregnancy. The house was far too beloved, and held too many memories, to move out of. But they couldn't be a family of four in a two-bedroom home.

From the landing, there were four doors. One led to the kid's bathroom, one opened into Jess and Rory's study, a good place to write when the rest of the house was in child-induced chaos. The other two doors separated Emily and Charlotte Mariano from the rest of the world.

"Em? Can I come in?" she asked, knocking on the middle child's door. She heard a squeal, a mad dash across the room, and a flying leap into bed, followed closely by covers being yanked over one's head. She pushed the door open and entered the room, arms crossed.

"Did I just hear someone out of bed?"

"Nope."

"Huh. I thought I could have sworn a little girl named Emily was standing over here," she walked to where the sprint had started, "And when she heard something at the door, she ran across the room," Rory quickly moved from one end of the room to the other, "and then she…jumped into bed!" Rory landed next to her daughter, extracting a high giggle from her. She peeled the covers back, and looked into the smiling brown eyes.

"Feeling better?"

"Maybe."

"I think you're well enough to help me clean up." Immediately the girl started to cough.

"I'm sick."

"Sure you are."

"I am!"

"Well then, I guess I'll have the hidden pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream all to myself, seeing how it's only for non-sick people."

"I feel better."

"That's what I thought. C'mon, let's go eat." Happily, she scrambled out of bed, and ran downstairs. Taking one last look around the pony-inspired room and seeing toys everywhere, Rory wondered how long ago she'd felt well enough to get up. She looked in Charlotte's room on her way down, seeing her oldest sleeping peacefully. Blowing a kiss to the little girl, she closed the door, and descended the stairs.

Emily was waiting on a stool next to the kitchen island, the only place big enough for the five to eat at together in the house. She'd already gotten out two spoons and two bowls, which sat eagerly beside her. Grinning, Rory retrieved the snack from the back of the freezer, and began dishing it out.

"Wanna know a secret, Em?"

"Yes!"

"Grandma Lorelai and Grandpa Luke are getting married!"

"Cool!"

"And guess what else? We get to fly on a plane next week to Star's Hollow, and see their wedding. Isn't that neat?"

"Yea!" Rory handed the bowl over, sitting beside her daughter.

"I think a new dress might be in order." Emily was the girl-girl of the three, so she smiled.

"Charlotte won't like that," she giggled. She was right. Charlotte would fight tooth and nail not to wear a dress, but she'd forget about it as soon as she had it on.

"Grandma Lorelai gets a new dress too. It will be white, and long, and pretty."

"Like yours!"

"Yes, like Mommy's wedding dress from the pictures."

"Can I see your dress again?"

"Honey, the pictures are in a box under Mommy's bed, we can get them out later."

"Please?" Bottom lip out now. Rory sighed.

"Fine. But try not to wake Daddy up." The two crept into Rory and Jess's room. He was breathing just heavily enough that it could be called snoring, without actually being unpleasant. In fact, it was extremely comforting. Rory rummaged under the bed, feeling for a heavy book, while Emily climbed on the bed and proceeded to bury Jess in pillows.

"Leave him an air hole," Rory commented sarcastically as she emerged victorious. She patted the heavy, leather-bound book as she waved Emily out of the room. Just as she was about to leave herself, she stopped, and cupped Jess's cheek with her hand. Smiling to herself, she brought her hand back to her lips, kissed gently, and placed her fingertips on Jess's mouth. Then she followed her daughter outside, closing the door behind her.

Emily waited eagerly in the hammock, swinging her feet back and forth to rock it. Rory hopped on and opened the book. It started with a few old pictures of Rory and Jess. Old, as in when they were seventeen. There was one of her sitting at the counter in the diner and nursing a cup of coffee. Jess was standing directly behind her, running his fingers up and down her arm. Neither was looking at the camera, and she couldn't even remember who'd taken the photo. There was another photo of the two of them lying out on the Independence Inn lawn, him reading aloud and her staring up at the clouds.

A few pages into the book, and Rory's 'visit' to California was shown. Her and Jess writing in the sand, eating, reading.

Next was Emily's favorite part- the wedding. The ocean was a dark blue behind them, and the sand was glowing dully. The couple stood, hand clasped, in front of their small audience. An ancient priest, Jimmy, Sasha, Lily, Lorelai, and Luke. The women dabbed at their eyes as then men looked on proudly. Rory and Jess saw none of them, just stared into each others eyes. It was a windy day, which became evident in the way Rory's long and straight white dress was blowing. The material had been so soft, and light. It hugged at her upper body, while flowing over the bottom half. It was very basic actually, just some white fabric held up by spaghetti straps. Lorelai had made it for her. It had been perfect.

Not long after was her pregnancy with Charlotte. Mr. and Mrs. Mariano in Star's Hollow for one Christmas, her belly swelling and his arm around her. He was staring at her as if she was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen, while she laughed at the sailor jokes her mother was making. A few pages later was the hilarious photo of Jess's face while she was in labor. Pictures from the rest of their life after that one miraculous day when Charlotte had been born followed.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

"NO!" Rory sighed and stared down at her daughter.

"Charlotte, you are not excused until you take three more bites."

"I don't wanna eat it, I'm sick! I'll barf it up!"

"Lovely. Jess, a little help here?"

"If I tell her to eat it, and then I myself refuse, does that make me a hypocrite and a bad parent?" He stabbed at the food on his plate with his knife, making a face.

"Never mind," Rory said exasperatedly. "Everyone, finish whatever you can. Then it's time for medicine and then BED." Four sets of brown eyes frowned at her. She simply brought her fork to her mouth, and continued eating her noodles.

After dinner, Jess attempted to give Anne a bath while Rory got the older two dressed, read-to, and in bed.

"Goodnight, Miss Charlotte," she said as she kissed the small forehead and turned the light off.

"Hall light, Mommy!" Emily yelled from her room. Rory complied, and then made her way downstairs. Anne was already fast asleep.

"Look at you, Superdad," she quipped as she picked up a towel in the bathroom. Jess came up behind her and snaked his arms around her waist.

"Huh. It looks like the kids are in bed early."

"Yes, it does, doesn't it?"

"Seeing how this never happens, we should take advantage of it…don't you think?" As Jess spoke, his hands crept upwards, and slid under her shirt.

"Honey, I love you, but," she stepped away from him, pushing his hands down to his side. "You're contagious." He huffed indignantly as she giggled and made her way into the living room to begin cleaning up the mess of dollies and books.

A few days later, they were piling out of Rory's beloved minivan (Jess had said 'No way are we going to be a minivan family'. Rory had said 'For the love of God, I'm pregnant! You do not want to incur my wrath!') at the airport.

"Okay, we're running late, so we need to hurry if we want to make our flight!" She glared at her husband, who stared innocently back at her. HE'D been the one stalling them, spending over an hour gelling his hair. 'I hope he gets plane-hair,' she thought bitterly as she hurried her family into the building.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Lorelai bounced up and down on the balls of her feet.

"We haven't seen Anne since she was potty-trained!"

"I love how the way you measure time revolves around bodily functions." Lorelai disregarded her husband-to-be, and continued to strain her neck.

"Do you see them yet?"

"No."

"They should be here by now! We've been waiting for over an hour!"

"That's because you insisted on getting to the airport an hour early. They'll be here on time."

"But what if they're not?"

"Then…they'll be here a little later. But they'll still be here."

"But what if they don't come? I mean, Rory's been really busy lately, what with a sick family and all, and maybe she overworked herself and then she passed out from exhaustion and Jess forgot to take her to the hospital so she died- OH MY GOD! MY BABY'S DEAD!" Luke looked heavenward.

'Please, make them come' he prayed silently. Perhaps as a wedding gift, his wish was granted. "Lor, there they are!" Instantly, his fiancée was sprinting towards the gate. Luke sighed, and followed her.

"Oh my God! You came!" Almost-Mrs.Danes grabbed Mrs. Mariano and engulfed her in a bone-breaking hug, which was eagerly returned.

"Of course we came! Why wouldn't we?" Lorelai pointedly glared at Jess, and Rory rolled her eyes.

Rory and the Mariano offspring crowded into Lorelai's new Jeep, this one blue, as she tried to convince Jess to go with Luke.

"We'll sit in uncomfortable silence for thirty minutes."

"Not a record for you."

"He'll try to break the silence, and end up saying something that pisses me off so much that I grab the wheel and steer us into a ditch."

"So don't grab the wheel."

"Dirty!" Both looked up at Lorelai as she grinned from the driver's seat.

"Don't make me go with him, Rory," Jess pleaded.

"Sorry babe, girls only!" She sat down shotgun to Lorelai and slammed the door.

"See you in Star's Hollow!" Throwing up his hands at the retreating vehicle, Jess didn't notice his uncle come up behind him.

"That was pathetic."

"Forgive me for not wanting to repeat our last visit's incident."

"All I said was 'She's a great woman'! You were the one who went ballistic on me and almost killed us!"

"It was the way you said it."

"Oh, and HOW did I say it? In what way could I possibly have complimented your wife that made you try to steer us off the road?"

"You said it like 'she's too good for you'. Made me mad."

"Yea, I figured that when we ended up in a ditch."

"How about we not talk on the ride back to Taylorsville?"

"Fine by me. And would you stop calling it that?"

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

At the wedding shower, the citizens of Star's Hollow fawned over their honorary princesses as Jess hung back and smiled to himself watching his daughters. A pair of hands covered his eyes, and he smelled a flowery scent overwhelm him.

"Come join in the festivities."

"I'm fine here, thanks."

"You're making it seem like you're not happy for them," Rory warned, sitting down on the grass and pulling him along.

"I'm not. In fact, I couldn't be more upset." She raised her eyebrows, surprised.

"What?"

"Them getting married makes us step-cousins. That's a little too weird for me. I liked it better when Luke was afraid of commitment." Rory smacked his thigh, glaring at him.

"Take it back!"

"You touch my leg again, people will call it incest," he continued smirking, amused at her reaction.

"You know it's not. Admit it, you're happy for them."

"Never."

"You are impossible."

"You married me."

"Believe me, that can be changed." Jess pulled her closer to him and kissed her head.

"You wouldn't get rid of me. Who else would get up in the middle of the night, drive into town, and buy you chocolate-chocolate ice cream just because the regular chocolate which we already had didn't meet your needs?"

"You did that once, and you act like I'm permanently stuck with you because of it."

"And that was just a normal night. When you were pregnant, damn, did I have to go on some weird food runs at weirder hours."

"Fine, you win. You're an angel," she granted, brushing her lips to his. He increased the pressure, and soon they were fully making-out in the middle of town. The only thing that stopped them was a cookie hitting Jess square in the eye. Both looked up sharply at Lorelai standing over them, grinning triumphantly.

"I knew that'd get your attention!"

"Did you need something?" Jess asked her sarcastically as Rory slid off his lap, straightening her jacket. Used to warmer climates, the whole family wore jackets or sweatshirts in the Connecticut spring.

"Actually, yes, we need more ice. I was going to ask you if you'd like to go over to the market and get some, seeing as you were looking a little bored over here by yourself, but never mind, I see you're now otherwise occupied."

"No, it's okay. He can go get ice," Rory answered, standing up.

"I didn't exactly volunteer."

"Really now?" A look passed between them, one that spoke pages in RoryJess language. He sighed.

"How much ice?"

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Jess stepped into Doose's already experiencing bad memories. Rory confronting him after she got back from Washington. Running into Rory and Dean kissing on his way to buy Superglue (why had he needed Superglue in the first place? He couldn't remember any pranks involving the stuff, so why the dire need?). He couldn't remember a single good moment that had happened in the place.

He navigated his way through the deserted market, noticing that it hadn't changed much. The door opened behind him and someone came in, whom Jess ignored. He was on a mission, and he didn't want to be bothered by stupid townies.

"Jess?" He turned at the voice, groaning internally. It couldn't be…

"Well well. Dean Forester. Never made it out of Star's Hollow, did you?" Jess hadn't seen Dean on any of his previous visits, for good reason. Dean lived in Woodbridge now, had moved there after Lindsay finally divorced him. He came back Friday afternoons like this one, however, to pick up their son Trevor for the weekend.

"Actually I did. AND I told people where I was going." The jealous-boy turned jealous-man held himself rigidly, staring down his enemy.

"What are you doing here?"

"Getting my son from Lindsay."

"Didn't work out between you and Malibu Barbie? Pity. Then again, after Rory Gilmore, or should I say Rory Mariano, nothing really seems worth it, does it?" Dean locked his jaw, fuming. The exact same things that set him off years ago still did, apparently. Smirking, Jess grabbed a bag of ice in each hand.

"Ring these up for me, would you? Or do you at least have a respectable job now?"

"You're insufferable. I cannot believe Rory put up with you for this long."

"Seven years, bag boy." It was an answer he was proud to give, Dean was stung to receive, and the taller man couldn't find a retort to. Shaking his head, Jess headed towards the cashier.

"You're Lorelai's son-in-law?"

"Unfortunately."

"These for her party?"

"Yep."

"Take 'em." Flashing a grateful half-smile, he exited the stuffy establishment, and returned to Rory.

"I just saw Dean walk into Doose's. There wasn't any bloodshed, was there?" she asked apologetically as he handed the bags to party officials. Kirk's boys.

"Only if he killed himself because his life sucks, whereas mine is perfect." He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder. She groaned.

"You were mean to him weren't you? Will you ever grow up?"

"Call me Peter Pan." She sighed exaggeratedly as he detangled himself to go retrieve Emily. The former dance teacher was already absorbed in conversation with the little girl, who was describing their life back in California.

"And I'm four and Annie's three and Charlotte's six and Mommy and Daddy write books and we live next to the beach and Aunt Lily comes to visit us sometimes and she cooks for us and Mommy can't cook but Daddy can cook and Grandpa Jimmy is silly and Grandma Sasha is fun like Grandma Lorelai and did you know Grandma Lorelai and Grandpa Luke are getting married and we were sick last week but not Mommy because she took all our tempetures and Mommy is reading me and Charlotte and sometimes Annie but not really cause she's just a baby Little House on the Prairie, and when she does Daddy pretends to cut up his wrists and then he read us a book called Slaughterhouse Five and Mommy got really mad and they yelled but they kissed and made up and Mommy let me have ice cream last week because I was better but I was just pretending to be sick and do you know my Mommy's Grandma is named Emily too…" She stopped to take a deep breath, and Jess took advantage of the lapse in constant conversation.

"Hey."

"Oh hi Jess, I'm just getting acquainted with your lovely daughter here."

"Yea. Em, we're going to Grandma Lorelai's parents for dinner."

"Okay, bye Miss Patty."

"Goodbye darling, I'll see you at the wedding. And your handsome father."

"Patty, I'd advise you stop staring at my ass. Rory may be generous, but she's not prone to sharing." Patty raised her eyebrows in an amused manner, and sashayed off with the internal confidence Patty always seemed to carry with her no matter how much she tipped the scale. It was how she'd roped in ex-husband number five.

"Daddy-"

"Let's go back to the Inn and get you dressed, what do you say?"

"You said the a-word."

"You're hearing things. When we get home, I'm taking you to the doctor so he can shine a light in your ear and find out why. It's probably all that television you watch."

"Can I have a piece of gum?"

"No, because you'll spoil your appetite, and I'm sure the Gilmores have something freshly slaughtered and baked in nut-flavored, expensive matter."

"But if I don't get gum, I might forget that you told me that I was hearing things, and tell Mommy what you said."

"Boy, I tell you. The parenting books never said anything about your four-year old blackmailing you."

"I like strawberry gum."

"And if I say no?"

"Mommy will cross her arms and stare at you like this." She imitated Rory.

"I like the fact that you're smart and someday you're going to kick everyone's BUTT in academics, but right about now, I wish you were a dumb kid."

"Gum." He sighed, reached in his pocket, and pulled out aforementioned bribe.

"You're going to get me killed."

"I love you Daddy." She took his hand and he guided them towards the Dragonfly, rolling his eyes every time she tried to blow a bubble.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

The Gilmore/Mariano tribe ate in silence, observing each other. Luke watched Emily Sr. out of the corner of his eye, still wary of her twisted, self-centered plotting. She'd threatened his relationship with Lorelai before. And she'd never approved of the Jess/Rory union.

Lorelai likewise watched her parents, as the two of them watched Rory and Jess. What the couple had intended to be a small, secretive ceremony her grandparents had seen as a deliberate attempt by "Jess" (dragged out to a two-syllable word, and accompanied by a sneer on the 'ss' hiss at the end) to keep them away from one of the most important moments of Rory's life.

Jess watched Richard as he watched him, sending unspoken messages between the two of them. 'You know you're beneath her. You're beneath all of us.' 'And yet, she's with me. Not any Yale blue-blooded boy you tried to pick out for her.' The two didn't know each other well enough to read minds, but each knew each other's motives, and that was enough.

And Rory watched her girls, shooting them motherly glances whenever an elbow was placed on the table, or a face was made at the yellowy sweet potatoes.

"So, Lorelai. Who is your wedding party composed of?"

"Rory and Sookie."

"And Luke, who will attend you?"

"My brother-in-law and Sookie's husband."

"That's lovely. I've always thought that a properly balanced wedding party gave the ceremony a certain sophistication. At Sharon Corran's wedding, she had nine women and four men. A complete disaster, before the bride even walked down the aisle." Rory was the only one who pretended to look interested in her grandmother's story, while Jess scoffed loud enough that Richard could hear him. He shot the man an angry glance ('Would it kill you to act dignified in public?'). Rory sighed at both men, and glared at Charlotte.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

The night before Lorelai's wedding, Rory sat on her mother's bed and brushed Lorelai's chestnut locks. They weren't grey due to the miracle of hair dye, but you could see signs of aging in the older Gilmore's graceful features. She was radiant, as always, and wore her age well.

The smooth silenced was interrupted only by the swishing of the hairbrush until Lorelai placed her hand over Rory's and stopped the brushing, and turned around.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Be married."

"Mom, you and Luke have been together more than a decade. He's been living here for years. This is just announcing to the world that you two love each other and are going to grow old together, there's nothing to know."

"Nah, there's gotta be a catch. How come you and Jess make it work?"

"It just…does. There's no formula, no rule book, no instinct. You just have to have faith I guess, and stick with it no matter what. If things suck, you have to know they'll get better."

"Is it hard?"

"Sometimes, I guess."

"Whentimes?"

"That's not even a word."

"Rory, I'm trying to grasp the whole concept of marriage, so I can be 200 sure when I walk down that aisle tomorrow. You have a perfect marriage- pretty husband, pretty kids, pretty house. You're my reference."

She was expecting a smile or a hug from her daughter. Instead she got an un-ladylike snort.

"Please. No one has a perfect marriage, especially not me and Jess."

"You guys always seem good when I talk to you," Lorelai responded, surprised.

"We're not quite Whitney and Bobby, but we have our moments we're not so proud of. We're actually pretty together most of the time, but when things get ugly, they get REALLY ugly."

"But everything gets all good in the end, right?" Lorelai looked like an eager teenager, trying to confirm the ending to a movie she'd missed.

"Forgive, don't forget. I think I live by that."

"But everything will be okay?"

"Everything will be okay. That I can promise. Marriage is like…a roller coaster. I know that's a really bland and overused comparison, but it is. Sometimes everything seems so perfect, and the two of you are in perfect harmony, and nothing can come between you. Sometimes you're hiding in the bathroom because you don't want your children to see you crying. It's scary and exhilarating and sometimes really difficult. But the good always outweighs the bad." She set down the brush and both laid back against Lorelai's overstuffed pillows.

"'Night baby."

"Goodnight my pretty little bride. Tonight's your last night as a single woman." Lorelai smiled.

"I can't wait." The room was quite except for their slowing breathing.

"So Will and Jada fight?"

"Go to bed mom."

"Not when I just found out you and Jess are Mr-and-Mrs-Smithing it."

"We are not Mr-and-Mrs-Smithing it. Please sleep."

"Totally ruins the mental picture I had of you guys now that I know you're normal."

"No beauty sleep makes for an ugly bride." Lorelai's gasp was indignant as ever.

"I am offended to the highest degree of offense!"

"Lay your head down."

"Now that I know you're not perfect, I don't have to listen to you anymore."

"Close your sleepy-weepy eyes."

"Oh, I can hear it! 'Jess, I said get me a beer now, DAMMIT!'"

"One more peep and I'm sleeping in the living room." That shut Lorelai up for several minutes. Before Rory dozed off, she heard a tiny 'peep!' drift mockingly into the air. Lorelai lay on her back, facing the ceiling, wide awake. 'Everything will be okay' she repeated to herself. Her last fear extinguished, she joined her daughter in slumber land.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Lorelai was a beautiful bride. She stood at the tiny alter erected on the Dragonfly lawn letting the presence of loved ones around her seep through her sleek white dress and into her newlywed's skin. Well, she wasn't quite a newlywed, more like an almostwed. But in a few minutes, she'd be a newlywed. Like Jessica Simpson. Kind of.

Rory stood at her mother's side, beaming at the dark head she'd brushed last night. Watching Rory's form in her close-fitting pink dress was her husband, bored with the ceremony, completely focused on his wife's hips.

Rory caught him staring as Lorelai and Luke read the vows they'd written themselves. Luke had spent weeks agonizing over his. Rory had helped Lorelai finish hers the previous day. But both contained the same amount of commitment and devotion. Back to Jess, Rory shot him a look. When two people are together for a long enough period of time, sometimes words are no longer needed. In fact, they tend to get in the way. Jess practically heard Rory directing his eyes to the bride with one glance his way. He smirked back before turning and obeying her. She blushed as she caught the smirk in her blue eyes, knowing full well what it meant. They were at an Inn. They'd meet upstairs later.

The rings were slid onto the third fingers, and Mr. and Mrs. Diner Man kissed. The group applauded, and the group proceeded inside to eat a fabulous meal made by the famous Sookie. Toasts were made, cups were drained, and plates were practically licked clean. The bride and groom swayed on the portion of the inn designated for dancing (the living room, where chairs had been pushed aside), and sometime during the night Rory left the wedding party's table to venture over to her husband and their three stooges.

Placing her hands delicately on his strong shoulders, she squeezed briefly and he tipped his dark, messy head back to smirk at her.

"Patty, do you mind looking after the girls for a few minutes?"

"Of course not, honey. I'll take them for more than a few minutes. Have fun," she finished slyly. The Marianos' relationship reminded her of her third marriage.

Standing up silently and taking Rory's hand, Jess headed for the stairs.

"And just where do you two think you're going?"

"Up," Rory answered her mom.

"Only the bride and groom can do dirty things at the wedding!"

"That's not a rule."

"It is on 'Wedding: The Lorelai edition'."

"Bye now."

"Ne me quitte pas!" Rory and Jess climbed the stairs, remaining hand clasped the whole time.

They reached the door of the room Jess and the girls had slept in the previous night. He dug through his pockets for the key as Rory impatiently leaned closer to affix her cherry lips with his ear.

"Ror, I can't find it if you're doing that." Ignoring him, she tilted her head to lick the tiny indent behind his ear while wrapping an arm around his waist. He abandoned his search, taking her face in his hands and joining their lips and tongues together in a dance of true and lasting love. Jess was completely unaware of Rory slipping her hand into the pocket she'd seen him drop the key in earlier. The door swung open after a brief struggle with the stubborn lock and Jess almost fell backwards, having lost that which was propping him up. He looked around wildly as Rory slipped out of his arms and into the room.

"How'd you do that?"

"I unlocked the door. I can teach you how, if you want."

"I couldn't find the key when you were doing that to me, how did you?"

"Apparently I have more self-control than some." He didn't object to that, just rolled his eyes and closed the door. Rory laughed as she turned towards the closer bed, and found it covered in nightgowns, footsie pajamas, and stuffed animals.

"I take it this is the communal bed?"

"Pretty much. I still don't see why they couldn't stay at Lorelai's house."

"Because Luke was in my old room, I told you that." Luke wasn't at his old apartment over the diner because it now served as an office, just like his Dad had kept it. And it helped house a portion of Lorelai's wardrobe.

"Okay then, I don't see why they couldn't stay in THEIR bed. Two beds, all three of them are in with me."

"They love their daddy."

"You're staying with me tonight, right?"

"Duh. Like I'd stay in that house with Mom and Luke upstairs in the thick of their wedding night!"

"Good." He placed a hand on each of her shoulders and steered her backwards to the untouched bed.

"Bossy," Rory commented as he gently pushed her down and followed suit.

"You know you love it." He finished the verbal part of their conversation as he slipped the pink straps off Rory's shoulders and bent his head to lightly bite the soft flesh.

Downstairs, Charlotte Mariano turned towards Miss Patty and pulled on her dress.

"Where are Mommy and Daddy?"

"They're busy, sweetheart."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Rory helped Jess with his tie as he ran his hands up and down her re-clothed body.

"Stoppit, you're making me loose my concentration," she whined. He smirked.

"What ever happened to little miss self-control?"

"Shut up." Finally satisfied with her work, she stepped back and began looking for her shoes. He looked down at his tie and the smirk got wider, remembering. She looked over at him and saw his face.

"What are you thinking about?" It was almost a groan. That was an evil, evil face he had on.

"Ties are very useful things."

"And?"

"They make for good leashes, blindfolds, bindings." She blushed, hopping aboard the same train of thought. To hide her burning cheeks, she ducked down and began searching under the bed for her strappy heel. A pair of feet approached, and then she saw thighs as he lowered himself next to her.

"You're turning red," he teased. She loved when he teased her- she always felt like a naughty school girl. Of course, it may have been because he only teased her about naughty things. Liking the reaction he'd gotten out of her, he continued.

"Remember that time when we were visiting your mom, and we convinced her to take Charlotte and Emily for an afternoon out?"

"Yes I remember, no need to continue." She wanted him to continue, they both knew it.

"And we played 'high school' in your old bedroom?"

"I said I remember, Jess."

"And I actually got you to put your Chilton uniform on." He sighed, recollecting.

"Hey, if I recall, there was a leather jacket on the floor with the plaid skirt." Two can play at this game.

Her shoes forgotten, they sat on the floor smiling into each other's eyes for quite some time. Finally, Rory snapped out of her trance and glanced at the cat-shaped clock. And winced.

"We've been up here for like an hour."

"It's not like no one knew what we were doing when we went upstairs. We DID have to walk through the dance floor to get up here."

"I know, but we left Patty with the girls. I feel bad making her watch them for this long." He could have protested, saying Patty had obviously been happy to take them, but Rory evidently did not want to be away from her mother's wedding for too long, so he reached under the bed and produced a shoe.

"How long have you known that was under there?"

"If I told you, you'd be mad at me."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

They returned to the reception, which was still in full swing. "Daughter!" cried Lorelai as she swooped in and took Rory from Jess. Jess approached Patty's table, where his daughters were coloring on pieces of colorful paper Patty had somehow procured.

"Nice hair, Jess," she said with a knowing smile.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Lorelai Danes was torn. She was completely thrilled that she was departing for her honeymoon the next morning, with her handsome new husband. But she was close to crying because her daughter and her daughter's family were leaving in a few hours.

"Move," she pleaded, following Rory around the kitchen as she tried to make coffee.

"We've been over this twice so far today mother. Grow up."

"Please?"

"Oh, well, since you said please…"

"I knew you'd see it my way!" She scuttled off to go throw some lingerie and juicy dresses into a suitcase for her honeymoon, making a mental list of all the reasons Rory should stay with her.

"California is dangerous!" she yelled down the stairs.

"I'm heading back to the Inn to get away from the insanity!"

"You can't escape it, it's hereditary!" she called back as she heard the door open and close. She grabbed a tissue and blew her nose as she dug through her sock drawer.

"That's one mean child I have…OOH, sexy!" She held up the pair of fishnets, Rory forgotten.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

"Lorelai, you have to let go of her."

"No. Don't wanna." She tightened her hold on Rory, not wanting to give her daughter up.

"Mom, please. I'm having trouble with the inhaling and the exhaling." Admitting defeat, she backed off, and kissed each of her granddaughters.

"I love you, and I love you, and I love you."

"Plane's loading," Jess said in an annoyed tone of voice. He never liked goodbyes, especially the Lorelai brand of. They were too sappy.

"Take care of your family, Jess."

"I will."

"Okay, I'm going because this is really hard."

"Bye mom. Have fun on your honeymoon." Loreali turned and headed towards the front of the airport while Luke said his final goodbye.

"Uh, what she said. Take care everyone."

"You too Luke." Rory pulled him into a hug, inhaling his scent. He had always smelled like Daddy. Luke had been the father Chris never could be. She pulled away, and walked towards the gates. Like ducklings, her children followed her. Luke stood alone with Jess.

He turned to his nephew. "She's a great woman, Jess." He smirked, resembling the younger man, as he shook his hand. "I mean it, no slight towards you intended."

"I know." Jess turned and followed his girls to the plane which would take them back to the golden land.

The end.


End file.
